Hi guys, I joined Nofap recently & I've had conversations with some of the members here. It's good to be here! So, going into hindsight,here's my story: I started when I was 18, late as compared to some of you, thanks to connectivity issues & good home atmosphere.Sweet Home Sweet! But,as I left my home for my college, rifts started to appear in my brain. Initially, I used to be very sad after acting out & punish myself really hard for doing something that was kind of impure. By making myself sad, I used to get that reason that would aid my studies. Every time I was little distracted,I used porn for getting that attention to redirect me. I crawled through like this for sometime. Then, after some time even that remorse & regret would be gone. Hell now, what do I do? How do I redirect myself to studies? There was no answer. I was feeling brainless.Like on the outside.Even this type of myself carried through the time. Now, when heights of mediocrity & non performance was rising at it peaks, I couldn't contain myself. I did 4 times in a row a day. I feel like I'm paying for this behavior of non performance. Now its high time to quit as I almost finish my graduation. I've people asking me for my downfall indirectly & making fun of me, giving me zero-to-fraction of attention,making me feel like I didn't exist. I couldn't tell anyone my reason. Hoping for someone to hear me out & accompany me.