No GF... Feeling like no girl wants me?

Discussion in 'Loneliness' started by Arbiter, Jun 4, 2018.

  1. Arbiter

    Arbiter Fapstronaut

    I really dont know whats the matter...

    I think im pretty handsome, I workout alot at the gym and practice healthy habits, but it seems like every girls that I try to get into a relationship with just rejects me blatantly or just fades away, and this has happened twice already... it makes me kind of sick and tired actually.

    Why?? Why does this keep happening to me? Why do I have to sit in loneliness all my life and see everyone else get love and attention??

    Dont get me worng, I have a pretty normal social life which I would consider even good, Im not shy or anything, but oh boy how do I miss affection man...

    Do you guys know any help?
  2. TheNewPat

    TheNewPat Fapstronaut

    There must be some things your personality lacks. Because it doesnt matter how attractive you are, if you have the personality of a brick, shes gonna ghost ya.

    Read self improvement books? Spirituality books? Make some female friends (ugly girls if thats what u need) that u arent attracted to. Learn how to be fun and interact with a female as a person,instead of an object to make u feel less lonely or for pleasure.

    I don't mean to be harsh or critical, it's just been the case in my life that every time i'm having a pity party about something, it turns out that if I change something about myself, the problem gets fixed. Not once has the problem being society or anything outside of myself.

    Just the opinion of an average looking 28 year old thats fucked around 25 girls.

    p.s We have the same clean time, lets do this bro.
    Last edited: Jun 5, 2018
  3. Truegamer007

    Truegamer007 Fapstronaut

    You must do this. I used to feel the same way as you. What you need is not a girlfriend but female attention. Every time you approach a girl you like, think "Can we be friends?" and move on from there. Most girls are happy to have guy friends cause most guys are just out to fuck them. Trust me, once you get enough female friends, that feeling of hopelessness and desperation will be gone.
  4. whoami33

    whoami33 Fapstronaut

    Twice? Doesn’t seems alot.
  5. superstorm250

    superstorm250 Fapstronaut

    If you’re getting girls on dates with you, then you’re still doing better than me. I’m almost 25 and I’ve never had a girlfriend, but I have been on one date 3 years ago and that did lead to us hooking up, nothing since then though. It just feels so much more hopeless now because inexperience can be such a turn off to girls and I don’t think any will want to be a 25 year old guy’s first girlfriend. One thing I especially hate though is when people ask me about my love life. It happened again yesterday at my seasonal job that I do every year and I was asked by a girl who used to like me last year (she was underage at that time) and a girl that I used to like and I’m pretty sure she liked me too (but I fucked it up) and they both have boyfriends now and were talking about their relationships, and then turned to me and asked me about my relationship status and why I don’t have a girlfriend.

    I basically said that I care more about money than having a girlfriend and don’t want to spend any on a relationship, then jokingly playing it off that I’m too greedy to get a girlfriend. They tried to poke some holes in that excuse, but it helped me dodge any other questions about it and saved me from having to reveal how inexperienced I am. I’d rather come off as a greedy prick instead of a total loser.
    Adam smithsonian30 likes this.
  6. TheNewPat

    TheNewPat Fapstronaut

    Dude... stop caring what others think. Youre assuming what they're going to think, but its wrong.

    "im not what i think i am, im not what others think i am, im what i think others think i am"

    Its a horrible life to not be honest and feel the need to create a false image of who you are.

    You obviouslyhave some kind of friendship with these two ladies. They feel comfortable around you and talk to you about stuff. That should really lift your spirits. A lot of men in the world seem to repulse woman, perhaps because they have no personality.

    The reason they were asking is because they're genuinely interested. So tell them. Tell them everything. Why not?? Because you think theyll laugh??

    If someone told you something deep and personal would you ever laugh at them? No? You'd feel connected.

    The next question they'll prob ask is ifur a virgin. I can understand if u wanna lie about that. I mean you shouldn't. But its fine.. say youve hooked up before but nothing ongoing. Joke and say, so basically i am a virgin. Hehe.

    Seriously. Be honest bro...

    They prb want to help.. will start telling u all sorts of things from females viewpoints. Theyll also probably try to get you to come out n hook you up with a friend.

    Im not trying to push shit on u dude. Just coming from personal experience. ... its so much better when we stop making this fake image of who we are.

    Life is so short.. before you know it, we will be old and thinking of our youth. Do you want to have no story because you faked it?

    Peace n love bro.
  7. superstorm250

    superstorm250 Fapstronaut

    I don’t care at all what others think of me, its just that I’ve heard several stories of guys in a situation similar to mine who have been honest about this with girls and their whole attitude and demeanor towards the guy changed after they found out, even though they were only platonic. That or you’ll get pitied, which did happen to me at this same job when a girl who used to work there directly asked me if I’ve ever had a girlfriend, she pitied me and then a year later she asked again and when I said that nothing had changed, she then asked me if I’m gonna be a confirmed bachelor for the rest of my life. So there’s at least a very good chance that they would’ve pitied me if I was forced to reveal that to them instead of dodging it like I did.

    And yeah the follow up question if I had been forced to reveal it probably would’ve been about wether or not I’m a virgin, at least I can honestly say that I’m not to that one. I still feel like this is better left hidden unless they force it out of me, which I will try to do everything I can to prevent from happening. I don’t know if I would want any help from them either, first of all because I don’t think anything will help because of how unattractive inexperience is to most girls, so that’ll probably ruin any attempt to date right away. And I don’t think I’d want them to set me up with anyone either because I have PIED, so even if I got to the point of going to bed with a girl they set me up with, I probably won’t be able to perform because of that and she’ll break things off with me after that, and the two girls that I know could even find out about it through her since we all know that girls like to talk about their sex lives with their friends that are other girls, just like guys do when we get together with our friends.
  8. Arbiter

    Arbiter Fapstronaut

    From my experience asking a girl out directly just doesnt seem to work.. I always have to face rejection and embarrassment after that

    Now one thing that I am thiking of maybe become friends with a girl that I like, then get closer and closer and hope its going to the intimate direction? I honestly dont know, because the last time I had a girlfriend she actually approached me... I think it just doesnt work the same way if a guy does that to a girl.

    Or maybe I just need female friends anyway, just like I treat any other person.
    What do you guys think?
  9. ALEX_88

    ALEX_88 Fapstronaut
    NoFap Defender

    depends on the approach you have with girls, try to really know them without thinking about going to bed. Amplify your circle of people, you know many girls, you will see that the right girl will make you understand with his look
  10. Trying to be the friend is a quick way to nowere, rejection is good because it helps you move on to someone else. I don't know what happened with your last gf but here are some tips
    1. don't be to avaible that means talking on the phone and texting limit it to once every other day NEVER TALK ON THE PHONE ALL THE TIME AT THE START OF A RELATIONSHIP your killing what could be talked about in person on a date
    2. When on a date try to touch her hands shoulder back to , no touching puts you in the friend zone
    3 U set the time and place to meet if she is setting the time and place your on the road to single ville
    4. always go for a kiss on the first date you have to at least try
    5. keep first dates short and less money NO FANCEY RESTURAENTS OR BIG EVENTS

    These are some on the tips I learned the hard way in dating and being frustrated for years if you don't want to face rejection stay home
  11. Adam smithsonian30

    Adam smithsonian30 Fapstronaut

    Im 20 and still got no gf ,i dont think they (girls) mind if become my first ,i think they fell more special ,same goes for you my friend
  12. _Xavier_

    _Xavier_ Fapstronaut

    If you are handsome and healthy, it is not your physical appearance that is the problem.
    I do not know if you are a pleasant person, but if you have friends and are sociable you probably are okay to be around, so not too much of a problem lets say with caution.
    I would however put my money on the type of women you are choosing. Are you choosing women that are capable of being interested? Are these women kind, caring, compassionate, and empathetic? Or are they hot, cute, or "your type?"

    A lot of the problems we face with "women" is really just the types of women we choose.
  13. _Xavier_

    _Xavier_ Fapstronaut

    Oh man.. If he/she want to text or talk, let them. Some people have meaningful conversations rather than the surface-level banter. "Do you want kids?" "Are you planning on getting married, working, staying at home?" ... These are great questions to filter out the women that you don't match with and will help you save SOO much time. Imagine spending 4 years with someone that you break up with and realize you are older, uglier, and have less to offer a great woman! If you are only there for the sex, maybe 1,2,3,4, and 5 are great ideas, but if you want marriage, this kind of stuff will not impress the best potential marriage partners out there.

    I used to buy into this shit too. "All women are similar," "Women just want a 'confident' man with no emotions and the best moves." Sure, the women that you can fuck the first or second night would love this, but they are the riskiest to get married to, the worst to have children with statistically (in terms of safety for your children).

    I recommend the book "Real Time Relationships" in my signature. It has all the things you need for love and I think it puts a very strong case forward. Try to read it without feeling extremely uncomfortable. I think you feel that way because it is true and you (and I) know so little. We were taken advantage of and lied to repeatedly by everyone around us for our entire lives.

    Maybe I'm just mad and misunderstood the points here, but I'm not sure.
  14. SeaUrchin

    SeaUrchin New Fapstronaut

    Sometimes when I talk to guys who have issues getting girls to go out with them it's because they've shown themselves to have ego problems. Usually when I've decided to stop talking to a guy that is great on paper it's because he wont stop talking about himself and never listens. Idk if that would be you but you could kind of watch yourself to see if you interrupt a lot or never listen.
    _Xavier_ likes this.
  15. elevate

    elevate Fapstronaut

    Two girls = every girl.

    You pretty much lost confidence and any sort of mental strength because things didn't go the way you expected it to with two girls.

    Do you really expect every girl you're interested in to be interested in you? Everyone is supposed to like you? Everything is supposed to work out in your life? Do you like every person that you meet?

    Losing your shit after trying twice isn't going to get you very far in life.
  16. greedie

    greedie Fapstronaut

  17. greedie

    greedie Fapstronaut

    im sorry to tell you that its you.thing dont just happen to us, we create things.thats the bad news.the good news is that if you create it than you can create something else.but once you swallow that bitter pill, i promise you your life will get better.hope that helps man
  18. NoBrainer

    NoBrainer Distinguished Fapstronaut

    I hate to burst your bubble, but 2 isn't a very big sample size. Failure is part of success man. Keep trying.

    Well, that's good. Take what you have and run with it I'd say. Do what you love to do, and eventually someone will come along who likes you back. :)
  19. The L0rd

    The L0rd New Fapstronaut

    Hello there ! The fact that you are working on yrself is awesome . You don't need girls to tell ya this ... I have the perfect cure for you ! It will take you about 25 hours but if you trust me you will stop Beeing lonely !
    1. Search for PUA community and read about it
    2. The game - Neil Strauss ReAD IT
    3. Look on thepiratebay or buy The Pimp - RSDJulien ( if you can t find it I ll send ya a copy )
    4. Meditation: the first and last freedom - REAd IT
    If you did all of this and still. Lonely it means you did smth wrong PM me and I ll have a Skype meeting with you . I want to help you man !
  20. Jackb97

    Jackb97 Fapstronaut

    You're thinking that the girls are the catch. You can be the catch if you will it.

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