No Motivation for live...

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by _overcomer_, May 21, 2018.

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  1. _overcomer_

    _overcomer_ Fapstronaut

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    It`s now 2years since I have started with PMO :( And since then, the motivation and strength has decreased in Gemeral. Less will to learn for the study, less motivation to meet people. Less motivation to make sport... .


    I really want my old live back. It was such a good and motivated live. Focused on important things. HOw can I "get a new grip on life..."???


    My mind feels weak :(. O my, what can I do.

    I despair of life
     
  2. _overcomer_

    _overcomer_ Fapstronaut

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  3. Ridley

    Ridley Fapstronaut

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    I would advise centering yourself. You can get through this, but you need to relax and pay attention to what's going on in your body and mind. Try doing this:
    For one week, I want you to try doing these things:
    • I want you to meditate for fifteen minutes after work every day (if you haven't entered the workforce yet, do it after school). You don't need to be an expert on mindfulness or spirituality. Just focus on your breathing. You don't need to try to control your breathing. You don't need to take special kinds of deep, intentional breaths. Just breath normally, allowing yourself to take in as much air as your lungs need and letting out as much as your body is willing to let go of. If your mind drifts away from your breathing, that's fine, it's perfectly normal. Thoughts and memories will come up while you meditate, and you will be distracted by noises and itches on your skin. Allow these thoughts and sensations to pass through you like water passing through a screen, observe them and acknowledge them, and then let go and focus on your breathing again. If you do this, you will get a much better understanding of your body and how it fits in with the rest of the world. It's really important to be in tune with your body, and it will help you relax more.
    • I want you to write in a journal for at least ten minutes before you go to bed each night. It doesn't matter how much or how little you write, but the important thing is that you open up and are completely honest with yourself. This journal is for your eyes only, and you don't even have to go back and read it if you don't want to. The purpose of the journal is to take the storm of emotions and feelings in your mind and put them onto a piece of paper, so you can let go of them and see them for what they really are. You may start writing about things that you didn't even know were going on in your head, and sometimes you will discover things about yourself that are really surprising. When I started journaling, I would often start by writing about my urges to watch porn, but I would end up writing about how I was abused as a child instead. Over time, I discovered that one of the reasons I watched porn in the first place was to escape from some of the horrors I was going through at home, and that understanding gave me so much insight into how to tackle my addiction and get my life back. Addiction isn't always the root of your problems: sometimes it is a symptom of something deeper in your life. Rejection, loneliness, depression, trauma, and other challenges in life are often at the foundation of your addiction, and it is often more important for you to understand what those challenges are than it is for you to force yourself to stop watching porn through sheer willpower.
    • Pick a productive activity (or several, if you like). This can be whatever you like, as long as it gives you a sense of fulfillment or purpose. This could be writing, playing a musical instrument, exercising (that's a good one), going for walks, calling a friend or family member, helping other people on this forum, working on a personal project, or cleaning up an area in your living space. Every time you have an urge to watch porn, go through these three steps: 1) Acknowledge the urge for what it is. Put a label on it. If you must, say to yourself out loud "I have an urge to watch porn right now". 2) Do your chosen productive activity for at least fifteen minutes. 3) Forgive yourself for being addicted and celebrate the fact that you did something productive with your time. Every time you do something productive instead of watching porn, you are free. Porn is slavery, and your freedom is something to be celebrated. In time, you will realize that porn is doing nothing for you, and that there is nothing to give up when you quit watching porn.
    Do these three things for a week, and then come back to this thread and tell me how you feel.

    If you're ever struggling, feel free to post more on here or even send me a private message. This is a very supportive community, and I'll offer whatever advice I can. You can get your life back, and your freedom begins the moment you stop watching porn.
     
    _overcomer_ likes this.
  4. _overcomer_

    _overcomer_ Fapstronaut

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    thank you
     

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