No PE while on PMO and PE while on NoFap

Discussion in 'Rebooting in a Relationship' started by Mr. R, Jan 20, 2020.

  1. Mr. R

    Mr. R Fapstronaut
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    Hey, this just freaks me out a little.

    I started nofap while in a sexual relation with my girlfriend, i remember i could usually last 5-20 minutes easily, but this was also the time while i regularly used PMO and i felt i did not have Premature Ejaculation.

    But my PMO (heavy user since 14 years old to 26 years old)was horrible and it was messing up my life, after one time, when i could not get hard to my girlfriend when we wanted to have sex - i decided to quit PMO.

    Couple of relapses on the way and after 30 days or more of NoFap, i noticed my penis is so sensible that i could not even enjoy sex session with her. I ejaculated under a minute all the time, doesn't matter if she was doing oral, with her hand or just plain sex. Every time i felt, its so sensitive to simulation and i could not help it but to orgasm in 30 secs or so, no way those kegel exercises or focused breathing will help me, if i put it in and after 2-3 strokes i already come.

    So eventually we broke up and found another girl while i was on 80 days on Nofap, eventually she started stroking me with her hand i already felt, i am going to ejaculate if she does that for 2 to 4 times more. My heart was pounding and i could not even get hard, but still felt, i am going to ejaculate so fast. I canceled the sex act, because i felt something is wrong or it's just the flatline.

    I am nearing 90 days and i ejaculate under a minute - am i really so screwed up?
    Any of you boys over 180 days and having normal (longer than a minute) sex sessions with their girls? And not having Ultra sensitive penis??

    I just want to enjoy intimate sex with my loved one just as much she wants to enjoy it with me, but with my so sensitive organ i cant do it and it makes me so confused.

    Thank you for reading and ideas.
     
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  2. Psalm27:1my light

    Psalm27:1my light Fapstronaut

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    So, my husband used porn from 11 yrs old . When we married on our honeymoon he took forever to come! All I could think is “ what the hell is wrong? Is it supposed to take 30 minutes???”. He always took a long time and let me tell you, I hated it. when he started his reboot about 4 months clean he was finally having hard erections, no pied and he would come as soon as he entered me. Omg! I will take that any day over de. He was always good about getting me to o. Now he’s a year clean no de, no pied, and no pe. I’d say he last about 5-10 minutes, he has more control. I will take 5-10 minutes of feeling like he’s there with me over 30-40 of “ I wonder who he’s thinking about” ! There are ways of making love that don’t center around your dick and orgasm. Karrezza was awesome during his reboot. If we want longer love making we agree to do karezza if we want shorter we talk about that as well. Any sex is better without porn!
     
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  3. Mr. R

    Mr. R Fapstronaut
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    I had a girlfriend who was enjoying more penetrational lovemaking, and i kinda assumed she feels as good as me, while doing PIV lovemaking. And when i came as soon as i entered her, she felt a little sad and disappointed not getting to enjoy longer session of lovemaking thus also making me feel the same. But i am surprised that you could take pe any day over de, because isn't it too fast for a woman, i mean she don't even get to o from PIV. Thank you, i will look up this Karrezza lovemaking.
     
  4. Galaxian21

    Galaxian21 Fapstronaut

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    If y’all are a little adventurous, you might try experimenting with a cock ring; if the fit is right (there are a thousand different types) it will help prolong your orgasm. Also feels amazing for both parties. Stay away from the tight ones that make your dick turn blue!
     
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  5. Psalm27:1my light

    Psalm27:1my light Fapstronaut

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    Lol, there are other ways to orgasm. He only had pe for a short while. I despise de. De makes a woman think she’s not turning her guy on. Holy crap, the first time he had pe I felt like a goddess!! I felt like damn he’s into me.
     
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  6. Faceplanter

    Faceplanter Fapstronaut

    I have had similar issues after dropping pmo. They are getting a little bit better, but it's really hard to know what normal is when you've been using pmo for a long time.

    One problem I think I had beyond just the sensitivity issue was that the reboot and a return to Os was starting to put pressure on me mentally and not letting me relax as much as is needed for PE to not be an issue.

    It is still a work-in-progress for me. I'm not as bad as what you're describing, which I was, anymore. But, I'm also not in the range of 5 to 10 minutes that I agree would be a good range.
     
    Mr. R likes this.
  7. Therein may lie the problem . . .

    I also suffer from some extreme hypersensitivity which led to a number of embarrassing situations in the last 2 years of NoFap . . . but I think, for me at least, most of it is mental.

    In fact, when I was in highshool, I used to compete in a particular sport until one day my keys were rubbing in my pocket the wrong way and . . . oops. :oops:
    From that day forward, it seemed to happen over and over again, especially during competitions, and I ended up just barely holding onto my varsity status. I remember consciously deciding to masturbate before competitions, but nothing seemed to help. I think it was the fear of ejaculation that would put me into such a state of anxiety that it became inevitable.

    Not too surprisingly, this PE problem went away as I got more and more into PMO, which evolved over years into DE. I thought it was "cool" that I could hold out for so long, but the women of NoFap (like @Psalm27:1my light) showed me that DE was quite the opposite.

    Flash forward: Recently, after nearly 300 days of hardmode, I got into a relationship. I was sure that everything would work out great . . . if I could just continue to avoid orgasms for the rest of my life and we could practice karezza.
    That didn't work out so well. She was unhappy that she was having orgasms and I wasn't. For a while there, I thought I might lose her over it as she suggested that maybe we just weren't "sexually compatible". So, I decided to stop holding back and . . . PE!! :eek:
    And the more nervous I got, the worse it got, until the time when I ejaculated as soon as I was inside of her. I was so humiliated and so anxious about losing her that
    I relapsed three times over the next few days. Not with porn, but . . . I ejaculated while doing sit-ups. And while taking a shower. And again while taking a shower, both times just from the spray of the water. I hadn't been edging, I didn't touch myself and I wasn't even erect any of those three times!!! :confused:

    But, here's the good news. Some of the women on here assured me that it's not the end of the world. I talked about it with my girlfriend (after she bought me some de-sensitizing cream) and I really haven't had much trouble since.

    I really think that it's more mental than anything. Hopefully that helps!
     
    Last edited: Jan 27, 2020
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