I feel so left out because I'm the last child of the family and my parents broke up before i was even born, I've lived a decent healthy life, but it seems like never felt safe, I always talk back to anyone who got in my way or attacked me, because I was thrown around with hardly any guidance, lately I was told as a joke on multiple times that "you are the last mistake you know that?" or "if you're never born, do you think we would've been living in a better house?" I knew from the start, no one wanted me, even those who do, do because they use me for their own benefit some way or the other, I'm smart and worked so hard on myself to reach this point, that's why I don't understand when I call close friends they're either busy with themselves or just never answers my calls, are they avoiding me? what did I do wrong? I'm going through so much right now and I can't seem to find someone who would listen to my mess, I've reached a point where I want to lock myself in my room and start a fire to end my life, I'm not crazy, in fact I've never been addicted to anything except PMO, but it seems like I no longer worth anyone's attention, or maybe I'm really crazy but I have not noticed yet, who knows.