NoFap Helps Your Mental Game

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction Recovery' started by CoolRandomDesiDude, Apr 10, 2021.

  1. CoolRandomDesiDude

    CoolRandomDesiDude Fapstronaut

    TLDR: NoFap helped me train my mind and charisma

    I want to share with you guys what NoFap will do to your mental game and charisma. I have never really paid attention to this side of PMO abstinence and I really missed out on some benefits and even fell to some trigger that made me relapse and binge afterwards. I feel like NoFap itself is a mental bootcamp of training your mind to work for you instead of consistently doing shit that fucks you over.

    The pre realization started on the day of my driving test. I was on a 5 day NoFap streak upto that day. However my mind immediately gave up after I made a mistake early on, and afterwards, the test was a shitshow. I failed, and have to wait one month now, but my parents after seeing the report told me that I best forget driving for 1-2 years because my mind is immature. It was at that point that I realized that it wasn't necessarily my skills or preparation or whatever holding me back. It was my mind. I was a perfect driver during my lessons to the point that my instructor just laid off on the wheel. All the mistakes I made on the test, they were newbie mistakes. Of course the pain of failing after I busted my ass was so bad, I decided to indulge in PMO and that was a reset to everything I worked on. This is another thing my mind tricks me to do, use it as a coping mechanism. Lose a provincial championship by 1 point? Wank. Get a bad report card? Wank. Screw up a jazz solo? Go home and wank.

    From that moment onwards, I decided to make a manifesto to improve my mind. I managed to get the binging run done with on the last day of March and continue strong with a streak as of today, due to the implementation of the act decelerating the former and accelerating the latter. Here is the manifesto:

    1. Hammer and Nail philosophy: This is something I learnt from football, and it is that the hammers do the hitting and the nails are the ones who get hit. The default position is always the nail because you don't need to do anything and unfortunately, many are nails. They do not get off their ass to get what they want. To be the hammer takes mental fortitude and you need to take the lead block. Hop in without doubt and commit to the decision otherwise you will be planted on the turf. For me, this means being assertive and not like, just wait another day/hour.

    2. Focus: I need to cut out whatever diversions take me off the main path. Things would be so much more catalyzed if I put a 100% effort towards one thing, and not let a good chunk get siphoned off to some unwanted waste product that will get me nowhere

    3. Resilience: One mistake is not the end of the world. Comebacks are started when one gets their shit in order. But if I consistently keep dwelling on past mistakes, that ain't gonna get me anywhere. After the mistake, I should start clean and play a new game. Tomorrow is another day. The next hour is another chance. Heck, why not start again the next minute.

    4. Do not guarantee the future: It is okay to envision your future standing in the long term, but in the short term, I always get caught up in the fruit I will reap when I haven't even passed the task yet. It just leads to more disappointment when you fail and detracts away from the holistic factors. Stay in the present. This is the only time that one can change.

    5. Recognize my mental tricks: They are sneaky, and will creep up on you. The hard part is that there is no vaccine-type training field where you can induce weak urges, fight them, and then graduate to bigger shit. You have to be thrown to the wolves for this to work. However, at least consciously recognizing that you are in danger is very key. It will disguise itself in many different perspectives. This is why I do not like counting streaks because it is common fodder for my mind to use against me. The one moment you say no, your will power builds. It is a muscle that has short term soreness and long term gain.

    6. Trust myself: Alluding to academics and my drivers test, there isn't something that I have not prepared or studied. One thing I like about me is that I often outwork and outprepare competition. However, my mind always wants to run at the slightest chance of resistance. I must stand strong and show what I know.
    This manifesto helped me maintain my streak. The temptations have been cut down numerously due to my vigilance. I am actually making good use of review time in school, and have had the endurance to last throughout the day and get shit done. This cuts down on the amount of work I get at home, leaving me more time to work on myself. I am also emitting this aura which is attracting both guys and girls to me thanks to my rehearsed knowledge in charisma. I am able to go up to teachers and ask them upfront about what I need. I am more engaged in class and am answering problems that I used to be underconfident about.

    However, another challenge appeared during this streak. A week back, I posted something political on my social media and some jackasses came to my house to harass me and my friend about it. We almost went to the police. I was fuming over that and considered breaking my streak, but I prevailed. I thanked God for giving me a challenge to test me and I passed it. I decided to take some lessons from the whole ordeal. I learned to become more unapologetic towards my stance as I often felt the need to explain it to everyone. It's my personal opinion and I should own it. The second was to stop posting my beliefs on social media because it is a shitstorm and there is no research skills whatsoever on there. Best not to lose brain cells arguing with uneducated people, who want to drag you down with them. I learned to isolate my political beliefs from the discussions I have with some friends, because we have 180 degree opposite stances and war will break out if we involve it in our conversations. Politics in general is all doom and gloom with media fueling the fire and one will have peace of mind if they engage less in it. NoFap helped me navigate all this by having a cool mind within all the anger pent up. It also reminded me that there is light at the end of the tunnel, which came to me a week from that ordeal.

    I had a presentation encompassing all my extracurriculars yesterday. I made a kickass presentation that encompassed all the things I did from community service to my YouTube Channel to my achievements as a tri-sport athlete. I am in a tough academic program which grants college credit so it is close to a miracle that I am able to juggle all these with my studies. I came in well dressed, well groomed, and ready to kick ass. The presentation was top-notch. This fascinated my classmates, who had the same questions as to how I was so well rounded. Throughout the whole day, my charisma just exploded. I had great conversations with my guy friends, and girls started gravitating towards me, wanting me to talk to them. This continued even after school ended. On the bus, I attracted compliments from strangers.

    Now that I have momentum, I need to use it in a good way and knock over all opposition. My next goal is to ace my exams, which are a tall task given my previous academic performances, but I have the key now, and that is the improved mental state. Many have left me for dead. NoFap will help me defeat this, and prove everyone wrong. May not have been the best throughout the last 2 years, but it is a good chance to make a change. Better late than never. The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago, the next best time is now. You all can dictate life on your terms with NoFap on your side.

    Share your thoughts below and please, if you have any suggestions to help my causes, do not feel afraid to share.
    mentorr and Candun like this.
  2. mentorr

    mentorr Fapstronaut

    A really strong post and interesting to read. I'm a fan of the hammer and nail philosophy - easy to understand and makes sense.

    Good luck to you my friend, wishing you all the best.
    CoolRandomDesiDude likes this.
  3. CoolRandomDesiDude

    CoolRandomDesiDude Fapstronaut

    Thank you man. The hammer and nail philosophy took some time for me to understand, even throughout football, but it is much more simpler when you boil it down to the two classifications. It is not about which guy is bigger in the drill, but rather who's mind is more hardened. It is more of a mental game. You will take hits, in football or life, which is a foregone conclusion, but it hurts less when you attack the opposition rather then cowering away. I was reading this great article on a millennial motivation page that I think got taken down a month ago, but it had a great example of that sums everything up:
    "The hammer scores touchdowns, shuts down the offense, and dates cheerleaders. The nail takes the bus home, bruised, and ices his ego"