I struggle not with PMO, but what's right and wrong. When you realize the miracles of retention only peak around a week, what gives? I'm not one of life's losers. I'm a normal, decent looking 5'11 guy. My friend group in college consisted of over 15 people all across the world. Pretty girls like befriending me. Idk, I have a gentle vibe and voice. I have always had a great crew of friends. It wasn't until NoFap came into my life have I felt extreme decay in my well-being and sanity. At first, life feels amazing. I go so many days, but then I flatline, experiencing extreme physical and emotional discomfort, and relapse. A relapse. I feel like everything about my personality has been stripped away. I no longer want to see or talk to my friends or look into the eyes of anyone. I bail on social occasions. I become awkward and shy. Things I never once experienced before I learned of NoFap. What is the problem of PMO? The answer seemed obvious long ago, but not now. Dopamine dopamine dopamine they all say. Successful people I know PMO. One of my very attractive girl space friends PMOs, and her life is thriving. My main guy friends who rake in girls PMO. Where the hell is the magic in NoFap? What is self-improvement? Nofap feels like an overrated placebo pill for people who have used PMO as escapism. I'm a 20 year old male for crying out loud. Speak of desire! Are we confusing addiction with biology? Many of you have no idea what a real addiction is like. I'm talking about addictions that literally kill you. One of my friends who is a survivor of about every drug on the planet (I have heard his full life story, it's a miracle he is even alive, let alone became a Christian.) He HATES people being "wussies" over PMO. It's all like life is falling apart when you PMO, the choice is a matter of life of death. It's not. Compared to what you could be addicted to, you are in the paradise of addictions. Something that only internally affects you, (and physically affects you if you PMO 3+ times a day.) I go through suffering, only to act like a dick to everybody I know during a flatline, then to relapse and avoid everyone. It tears me a part, there is never an equilibrium. I just want to be me, without feeling like I need NoFap, or feeling like I should avoid it. I need some help.