NoFap is ruining my life.

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by Master-Keaton, Aug 7, 2020.

  1. Master-Keaton

    Master-Keaton Fapstronaut

    I struggle not with PMO, but what's right and wrong.
    When you realize the miracles of retention only peak around a week, what gives?
    I'm not one of life's losers. I'm a normal, decent looking 5'11 guy. My friend group in college consisted of over 15 people all across the world. Pretty girls like befriending me. Idk, I have a gentle vibe and voice. I have always had a great crew of friends.
    It wasn't until NoFap came into my life have I felt extreme decay in my well-being and sanity.
    At first, life feels amazing. I go so many days, but then I flatline, experiencing extreme physical and emotional discomfort, and relapse.
    A relapse.
    I feel like everything about my personality has been stripped away. I no longer want to see or talk to my friends or look into the eyes of anyone. I bail on social occasions. I become awkward and shy.
    Things I never once experienced before I learned of NoFap.
    What is the problem of PMO? The answer seemed obvious long ago, but not now.
    Dopamine dopamine dopamine they all say.
    Successful people I know PMO. One of my very attractive girl space friends PMOs, and her life is thriving. My main guy friends who rake in girls PMO.
    Where the hell is the magic in NoFap? What is self-improvement?
    Nofap feels like an overrated placebo pill for people who have used PMO as escapism.
    I'm a 20 year old male for crying out loud. Speak of desire! Are we confusing addiction with biology?
    Many of you have no idea what a real addiction is like. I'm talking about addictions that literally kill you.
    One of my friends who is a survivor of about every drug on the planet (I have heard his full life story, it's a miracle he is even alive, let alone became a Christian.) He HATES people being "wussies" over PMO. It's all like life is falling apart when you PMO, the choice is a matter of life of death. It's not.
    Compared to what you could be addicted to, you are in the paradise of addictions. Something that only internally affects you, (and physically affects you if you PMO 3+ times a day.)

    I go through suffering, only to act like a dick to everybody I know during a flatline, then to relapse and avoid everyone. It tears me a part, there is never an equilibrium. I just want to be me, without feeling like I need NoFap, or feeling like I should avoid it.
    I need some help.
    Espi1971, domasfernandez and r8js like this.
  2. CT82501

    CT82501 New Fapstronaut

    Dang I just relapsed and it was horrible. I come to this site to try and get over it and this is the first post I see lol...
    Espi1971 and domasfernandez like this.
  3. StarRider

    StarRider Fapstronaut

    Most non-sex-addicts with sex life don't feel the need for MO. In fact, a substantial amount - if not the majority - of women doesn't masturbate at all.

    The typical addict has no idea what "moderation" actually looks like. Some consider sixty (!) times per month "moderate".

    The cold-turkey withdrawal symptoms prove that you are a sex addict. Your healthy friends can go so many days without experiencing any discomfort.

    The uncomfortable truth for a sex addict is that they need to stay completely abstinent, just like any alcohol addict.
  4. r8js

    r8js Fapstronaut

    Yes , it's time to appreciate the people who enjoys studying biology and geography.........
    domasfernandez likes this.
  5. Akeakua

    Akeakua Fapstronaut

    It's all about the attitude accompanying the approach. The same way like running and pouting won't help one to feel much better at the end of it, being along this journey and pouting about this or that, it's the same thing. Your desires seem to lie elsewhere right now.

    And PMO addiction has set back several people in their lives and wellbeings. It's no joke, not quite the "paradise of addictions" you paint it to be. I hear what you're saying that it is less immediately life-threatening. While somewhat true, PMO can eventually lead to someone contracting HIV/AIDS or lose much passion for life, they have effectively been desensitized and don't feel the highs or lows, depression...

    At the end of your post you sound frustrated... consider changing your approach. This NoFap is unlikely the sole factor in your mood swings. Personally, my second and third years of college were turbulent, inner frustration and depression. Consider journaling/reflecting/meditation... Do you have a vision, a plan for life?

    All being said I really hope things look up for you soon and you're able to better locate the sources behind your frustrations. Take care brother.
    Espi1971, r8js and CodeTalker like this.
  6. Candun

    Candun Fapstronaut

    It's not about knowing what a "real" addiction is like, it's simply about experiencing a behavioral vs substance addiction. You could debate which one you think is worse, but it doesn't really matter considering you can find mild and severe cases with both types. And there is no such thing as a "paradise" in addiction. It's like saying being drowned is a paradise compared to being set on fire.
  7. greenishmoon

    greenishmoon Fapstronaut

    I doubt you wrote all that just to say that NoFap doesn't work. You clearly found something that is making you stressful, but if we're talking about abuse of pornography or masturbation I can't really see any downfall in abstaining from that.
    I could however imagine that if it has been a pillar of your behaviour in some way, aftet abstaining you would feel really unstable.
    khabastos and Knighthawk like this.
  8. You mean masturbation? Because it will kill you, too. It will shorten your life, even if this may not be as suddenly as getting in a car accident from being drunk. When you unnecessarily deplete your nervous system of its energy, there is always a consequence. Death eventually comes to all who abuse their health--earlier than otherwise. One can commit suicide by gun, by smoking or drinking or drugs, or by masturbation; some methods just have more immediate effect than others.
  9. Reborn16

    Reborn16 Fapstronaut

    It sounds like you may have to dig deeper into your issue.

    What exactly does porn provide you? And how exactly could you get that same need in a more healthy way?

    Something like this can be a pivotal shift for you. Instead of PMO being viewed as just another activity, with its pros and cons, it is now an unhealthy replacement to a healthy choice you could make instead.

    It doesn't matter if you're achieving heaps of goals, of having plenty of sex. You can still be just as lost in the grand scheme of things.

    Do you know exactly where you'd like to be in 5 years? Would PMO be in the picture for your ideal lifestyle in 5 years time, seriously?
    Last edited: Aug 10, 2020
    Espi1971, khabastos and Akeakua like this.
  10. Envoy-ofthe-End

    Envoy-ofthe-End Fapstronaut


    Have you even considered that when our ancestors got horny, they went to approach a woman ? How is PMO normal? PMO is worse than cocaine and I know because I've tried cocaine and it's not the best feeling. PMO wastes your life.

    Oh and btw, if cute girls want to be friends with you that's not a good sign lol. Personally if i have friends that are girls we end up fucking, so in reality it's because there is always some sexual vibe thrown around.

    Look I've been through this moment of flatline and it's terrible, reached 32 days and relapsed. But just because you're too weak to keep going doesn't mean nofap doesn't work. If you want cute girls to be your girlfriends and not just friendzone I suggest you stop whining and keep going.
  11. CodeTalker

    CodeTalker Fapstronaut

    An addiction doesn't have to kill you to be real.

    Ok, so because someone has it worse, my pain isn't worth considering?
    If that guy is christian, he must understand the pain that this addiction came with. It's beyond physical and mental.

    It affect everybody around me.
  12. Actually, this point cries out for some attention.

    I have a biology degree, and considerable knowledge in the medical field. I know for a fact, for example, that women in their teen years are preparing their bodies, health-wise, for the pregnancies they'll have in their twenties. Our bodies do not react as quickly to dietary and lifestyle factors as many suppose. What you do now in your teens and twenties will come back to haunt you in your early 30's to early 40's. That's a fact. Young people often feel invincible, and do not realize that in reality they are borrowing energy from the future to squander it today when they indulge in their fleshly lusts. Often, the realization of this truth comes much too late.

    You may feel perfectly fine right now, and experience little to no noticeable side effects, but, if you are wise, you will accept the wisdom that usually comes only with age. Learning from others' mistakes is easier than to learn from your own.
  13. Man what are your goals? It depends on you if you want to go on with NoFap or quit It.

    If PMO makes you feel good and NoFap is ruining your life you can turn back to PMO.
    It's your choice.
  14. khabastos

    khabastos Fapstronaut

    @Master-Keaton, have you considered that maybe there's a problem with the fact that, once you stop doing PMO, your life seemingly falls apart? You seem to use that as proof that PMO is not that big of a deal, that it's a good thing even (correct me if I'm wrong about that). If abstaining from PMO truly makes you feel like shit, then isn't that the clear cut sign that you're addicted?

    Following that logic, do you want to stay addicted?

    NoFap is a placebo pill, you say, yet everyone on this website will tell you that NoFap on its own won't make you improve. NoFap is about releasing you from your chains, what you do with your freedom is entirely up to you.

    NoFap isn't ruining your life, withdrawal is. And it will do much worse things if you delay the recovery process.
  15. hollyman

    hollyman Fapstronaut


    20 is considered adult in many country therefore u must have the mind of an adult which contain full knowledge of resposibility and what best for you

    if u think NoFap isnt good for you then just leave man, what the catch up point crying out in this thread anyway ???

    or are you one with the mission to drag us down and leave nofap too ???

    sooner or latter u will feel the negative impact of porn too if u choose that path,,, welp u already know where to go
    khabastos likes this.
  16. HolyVirgin420

    HolyVirgin420 Fapstronaut

    @hollyman , you should appreciate these kind of posts because they could spark a healthy debate on the validity of the NoFap. Without it we'll all follow the herd mentality and think that NoFap is good without understanding the "why". Plus I think this community has a place for doubters just as much as believers, no one is trying to drag us down.
    khabastos likes this.
  17. Dude just treat nofap like a challenge and nothing more. The more serious you take it, the more guilt you will feel when/if you relapse and the more you will believe in these bullshit "super powers". I use to think nofap would somehow flip my life around, but nofap alone won't do mother fuckin shit (unless of course you're jacking it like 5 times a day to like bdsm or whatever the fucks hip nowadays). Just perceive nofap as a way of exercising your will power, not a fucking lifestyle.
    greenishmoon likes this.
  18. Ruthless Hamster

    Ruthless Hamster Fapstronaut

    NoFap is nothing but a tool to either get rid of a pornographic addiction or at the very least, try to bring it down to a tolerable level but usually it's getting rid of it entirely because moderation is pretty hard to do when it becomes compulsive but either way, it is still possible.

    If you're not addicted to porn or anything relating to that sort, you're not going to get any benefits at all. The most you're going to realize is that you are able to exercise your willpower more than you have before. There are people who watch porn everyday, three times a week, once a week and still go on about their lives and still socialize with others because to them, porn is really nothing else but just a substitute sexual outlet.
    A lot of people on NoFap who have "transformed" their lives from not touching their dick or releasing any semen are generally people who had/or still have unchecked mental health problems and got off of their ass and made a change instead of wallowing in their emotions and medicating their problems/moods with porn.

    And I do agree with you, a lot of people here use the word addiction very lightly. However, porn addiction is another entirely different beast of its own.
    NoFap isn't going to transform your life because you're holding your semen in. An individual can do the same thing and be "Pro-Porn", it's just a matter of motivation and how badly you want this "thing" to happen. Moderation exists, if you can exercise it, do so.
  19. hollyman

    hollyman Fapstronaut

    cant help myself because its so cringy tho, sorry, hoped just like u said,, just a doubter not intentionally drag us down
    HolyVirgin420 likes this.
  20. RollerCoaster

    RollerCoaster Fapstronaut

    may I ask when you started NoFap?

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