Today I signed up for the weekly support groups after breaking my streak of 9 days. I really want to break my habit but it's become an extremely strong negative habit (have been PMO'ing for over 15 years and haven't managed to break the habit). I'm losing faith in myself because I didn't go to do work/reading yesterday night when I didn't feel tired but PMO'd. I am trying to do a LOT of work learning Ruby programming and was super stressed as I had a lot of work left (but I was working on my laptop on the bed ). Next time I need to work on the sofa in my room instead so that I'm not tempted to PMO. Also, will not avoid going downstairs to see my sister and mum, who I feel emotionally dependent on still. Will try and accept my family and be myself around them, but still do what I need to and not feel ashamed of myself. I have been accepting of my father but still want to be more independent so have avoided going downstairs (I might see my sister who I am emotionally dependent on), when I really should go to get out of the situation when I get urges. I have so many goals I don't know where to start, I am already journalling every day so will have to limit this journal to small notes at the end of every day about goal progress/relapses. I have high standards to achieve more in my life but am not able to sustain my improvements for more than a few days. Will try to keep up a longer streak from today and prepare for urges reading about others' messages on this forum.