Not feeling enough

Hello everyone,

I recently started to use NoFap again. I tried once before last year but I stopped due to lack of commitment, this time I want to be more involved that way I can help my recovery.

First of all, I just finished my first year in uni. For most of my academic career I have been a B student, with the occasional A-, but I never saw an A or A+ before. In the junior year in HS I wanted to try to attend one of the top schools in my country. The admission rate of at least 95% average and here I was barely pulling off a 75%. In my senior year I really got my act together, I studied my ass off, I got a math tutor, I tried everything in my power to get into that school. I ended up finishing HS with a 91% average. While the result was good it wasn't enough, I got rejected. I ended up going to a smaller college nearby to save money.

The reason I said that story is because whenever I try to improve my life and move forward I always think "why does it matter that you're trying you're still not going to X university, so you will never be as good as the guys that go there". This feeling makes me feel depressed and I lose motivation in everything including NoFap. I can rationally understand that my obsession with X university is unhealthy and that it will end up destroying my life in many areas, but emotionally I still can't let go. I tried my absolute hardest to achieve a goal but still came up short. Have any of you experienced a setback like this and how did you move forward from it?