Not feeling so good

Jae_90 · May 24, 2020

I feel alone. I have no friends. I can’t really do much in my area, except go for my morning runs at the park up the street. I had to get rid of my social media accounts because that wasn’t helping my social anxiety, depression, and P addiction. Every time someone tries to talk to me, I get real nervous and I start feeling that I am awkward. I never walk away from a “conversation” feeling good. Nobody at home knows what I am going through. I try to put on a smile and act like I am okay, but deep down I just want to bust out in tears and give up. I feel like a loser.

Dipper Pines · May 25, 2020

Friend, I'm so sorry you're feeling that way. Loneliness sucks. It sucks even more when you feel you can't express your hurt and receive help from those close to you

Deleted Account · May 25, 2020

Jae_90 said: ↑

I feel alone. I have no friends. I can’t really do much in my area, except go for my morning runs at the park up the street. I had to get rid of my social media accounts because that wasn’t helping my social anxiety, depression, and P addiction. Every time someone tries to talk to me, I get real nervous and I start feeling that I am awkward. I never walk away from a “conversation” feeling good. Nobody at home knows what I am going through. I try to put on a smile and act like I am okay, but deep down I just want to bust out in tears and give up. I feel like a loser.
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Man you said it yourself "I never walk away from a “conversation” feeling good" i know what you are saying, i felt it too, but is just a feeling, YOUR FEELING, not somebody elses. You cannot know actually how the other people feel or think, you are feeling akward but the other person can like it. You shouldnt boicot yourself.

Allow yourself to be akward. Focus on yourself, accept yourself as you are. There is nothing wrong with you. Be honest with yourself, dont try to force a smile on your face or fake anything to anybody. Be honest.
Cry, feel bad, feel akward, permit yourself to feel as a loser, allow it in you life and accept it.

Everybody feels that way sometimes. It is part of the vital experience of a human being, if you erase that "bad part" you are going to erase the good and fun and worthwile parts with it.

Deleted Account · May 25, 2020

Jae_90 said: ↑

I had to get rid of my social media accounts because that wasn’t helping my social anxiety, depression, and P addiction.
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This is a great first step to getting actual friends. Good work.

Jae_90 · May 25, 2020

Thanks, man

Jae_90 · May 25, 2020

Speedhoven said: ↑

Man you said it yourself "I never walk away from a “conversation” feeling good" i know what you are saying, i felt it too, but is just a feeling, YOUR FEELING, not somebody elses. You cannot know actually how the other people feel or think, you are feeling akward but the other person can like it. You shouldnt boicot yourself.

Allow yourself to be akward. Focus on yourself, accept yourself as you are. There is nothing wrong with you. Be honest with yourself, dont try to force a smile on your face or fake anything to anybody. Be honest.
Cry, feel bad, feel akward, permit yourself to feel as a loser, allow it in you life and accept it.

Everybody feels that way sometimes. It is part of the vital experience of a human being, if you erase that "bad part" you are going to erase the good and fun and worthwile parts with it.
Click to expand...

Thanks, man. This really helped a lot

seaguy44 · May 25, 2020

How are you today? Checking in with you today bro

Jae_90 · May 25, 2020

I feel good, thank you. I finally decided to try and meditate. It felt good. I’m sure the more I keep doing it the more I’ll get better at it. I’m feeling positive today

seaguy44 · May 25, 2020

Jae_90 said: ↑

I feel good, thank you. I finally decided to try and meditate. It felt good. I’m sure the more I keep doing it the more I’ll get better at it. I’m feeling positive today
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So happy to hear about that Bro!

Jae_90 · May 25, 2020

Thank you ✊

OhWhenThe · May 25, 2020

Same here.

Last night I couldn't sleep so I went to my local football cage, it was 3am and there I was just kicking a ball around on my own. I had this inner battle with myself where I was thinking how I wish someone would come along and have a kick-about with me but at the same time equally hoping that no one would turn up - not that I thought that was likely as what kind of nutter is up at 3 in the morning wanting to play football anyway.

I have no one but the worst part is that I just feel like I can't accept myself enough to change that. On the rare occasion that I do actually speak to someone I feel like I'm interviewing for a job, my thoughts get muddled, I can't think of anything to say and I can't wait for the interaction to end.

Jae_90 · May 25, 2020

OhWhenThe said: ↑

Same here.

Last night I couldn't sleep so I went to my local football cage, it was 3am and there I was just kicking a ball around on my own. I had this inner battle with myself where I was thinking how I wish someone would come along and have a kick-about with me but at the same time equally hoping that no one would turn up - not that I thought that was likely as what kind of nutter is up at 3 in the morning wanting to play football anyway.

I have no one but the worst part is that I just feel like I can't accept myself enough to change that. On the rare occasion that I do actually speak to someone I feel like I'm interviewing for a job, my thoughts get muddled, I can't think of anything to say and I can't wait for the interaction to end.
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If you can just take deep breaths. When you’re conversing with someone just try to focus on the conversation, try to picture a story what they’re talking about. Go into the conversation with positive thoughts and just say f*ck it. If you feel that the conversation didn’t go so well then f*ck it, try again and again another time. I hear meditating is cool too.

seaguy44 · May 25, 2020

Jae_90 said: ↑

If you can just take deep breaths. When you’re conversing with someone just try to focus on the conversation, try to picture a story what they’re talking about. Go into the conversation with positive thoughts and just say f*ck it. If you feel that the conversation didn’t go so well then f*ck it, try again and again another time. I hear meditating is cool too.
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I struggle the same issue with coworkers and people that intimidate me. I agree with you. Just go into the conversation with positive thoughts.

Jae_90 · May 25, 2020

seaguy44 said: ↑

I struggle the same issue with coworkers and people that intimidate me. I agree with you. Just go into the conversation with positive thoughts.
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Yes. Try and detach all the negative thoughts before going into a conversation

seaguy44 · May 25, 2020

Yeah. I take Klonopin, the anti-anxiety medication. It helps but it's just a tool.

Jae_90 · May 25, 2020

seaguy44 said: ↑

Yeah. I take Klonopin, the anti-anxiety medication. It helps but it's just a tool.
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How do you like that medication? Maybe I can bring it up to my doctor if you think it helps. I’m taking fluoxetine and bupropion at the moment.

seaguy44 · May 25, 2020

It's good. It keeps my anxiety at bay when I need it. Bupropion made me too anxiety. Fluoxetine had me having poor erections so I stopped both.

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