This post will be about getting a relationship and I'm not sure it makes sense but I had to post it and perhaps someone can relate. Sometimes my progress is killing me emotionally. My friends are ALL in relationships and my amount of success has only resulted in my family asking me whenever im gay (Im not). Here I am 'happy' when I have the opportunity to talk to a cute clerk while my friends are all in loving relationships having sex every day... Honestly, a kiss would probably make my month and they have it everyday as nothing special. What im getting at is not jealousy it's the ridiculous depth of my achievement and how I need to aim further, way further. Im at a point now where I have worked on myself A LOT, I have more potential now than ever before. My friends tell me I'm intelligent, knowledgeable, socially experienced, confident (I like myself), independent and funny (despite being an introvert). I have also learnt pua to an intermediate level and I sometimes get compliments on my physique by other dudes lol. Yet I have nothing to show for it. My friends tell me I can get a girlfriend if I try more, I just don't know what's holding me back from trying (or why I always have to do everything myself, they were all approached by their girlfriends initially and they are cute girls!) Everytime (everyday) I think of where I'm at and my heart aches so much I feel incapacitated, literally crippled, I have to stop what I'm doing or distract the thought away because it just stresses me out and matters to me so much, like wtf pathetic. I can't move on until I've had success, I need intimacy for balance in my life. I appear calm, this is just my emotions. I need to use my gained potential but I don't feel a desire to act because I never really get any validation from women as in them approaching me, compliments or even checking me out. Mostly my energy is low because I feel hopeless, but I can put on a social mask and dig deep for some energy until I get home mostly. First 30 days of nofap has given me a big boost but now I'm suddenly feeling somewhat drained of energy again. How do I fix this guys? I refuse to accept a victim mentality, it will get me nowhere. How do I get enough energy and optimism or desire to act? I am ready and capable and don't fear rejection but something is holding me back. I want to write a post in success stories for you guys, for once. Thanks for the read, any reply is appreciated.