Not knowing what to really do with myself, feeling lost

Discussion in 'Loneliness' started by ZenMoment15, Jul 15, 2020.

  1. ZenMoment15

    ZenMoment15 New Fapstronaut

    16 year old here, I've been in the this nofap thing since the mid 2017's up till now. My highest days of nofap was around 70+ and that was back in early 2019 or mid 2019. I often relapse when I check the amount of days i have gone with nofap for some reason, so I often don't check my counter at all because of that.

    Lately during this quarantine I am probably in 35 or 38 days of nofap if I remember counted correctly. I have scheduled my weekdays in an attempt to keep busy like on Sundays I exercise and on Mondays try out creating music or 3d modelling but lately I have been just not feeling it. I honestly overthink a lot of my plans and ask if there benefiting me all the time.

    I have chores that I do in the early morning and and in the afternoon I either exercise or play video games or read something to pass the time. I've been trying to balance everything and trying not to overdo my self improvement because I've burnt myself out in the past. My week plan is like this Sunday chores then workout, Monday chores then trying out hobby's on repeat except Thursday and Saturday, where I basically do anything I want for those two days after chores are done.

    I just feel like the things that I'm doing is kind of empty. Everything I do seems like it's useless. I'm so moody, more moody than when pmo'ed more frequently. It's hard to manage.

    Playing video games before was fun way before I started fapping at age 12, I played games with my dad back then as a way of having fun and bonding. I mostly actually watched him play games like metal gear,
    games that are more story oriented or basically single player games. I don't know how I feel about them anymore today.

    I like reading a lot of fictional stories of genres like sci-fi and Fantasy but lately I've been questioning those habits of mine as well. I feel as if im wasting time and I'm doing a lot of things wrong.

    Exercising for me right now feels like I'm just passing the time as well. I don't really feel that much accomplishment after I do it to be honest.

    Trying out new hobby's have always at first been interesting to me when I first try them out but after 2 or 3 days have past I'm so bored with them and feel like I'm getting no where

    I'm just so lost and I don't really know who I am anymore. I can be happy then the next second sad, deeply thinking about my life and if the things I do are even significant to me. I'm just really confused on what I'm supposed to be doing.

    My first post is so messy. Not even sure if anyone reached the end.
  2. L3t'sG0

    L3t'sG0 Fapstronaut

    Huh. This reminds me of myself at one point. Not knowing what to do or why I should do it. Everything just seems forced on me, work, society, being "acceptable". So, I started listening to myself more instead.

    Always check with a doctor to see if you have bipolar disorder. Be careful to not catch covid and hopefully you'll see there's something wrong and that you are excited that you can fix it.

    What do you feel guilty about? Do it in your own pace. Then, if you want, discuss it with us. We can help you because we were there once.

    I promise you'll get better.
    Have a great day.
  3. ZenMoment15

    ZenMoment15 New Fapstronaut

    Thanks for the reply.

    Im feeling a lot better now, still confused but not as depressed I guess.

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