I am convinced that there is nothing so detrimental to the body countenance appearance and health as the excessive losses of semen After having an 8 months nofap streak, my appearance became more handsome, more sightly, my skin improved, my face looked more radiant. And then, I ejaculated 6 times within a 2 week span. (I experimented, and it seems it doesn't matter how its done, any type of ejaculation substantially weakens me). Fast forward to today, 3 weeks of no pmo, and the effects of my relapse are still very evident: slow thinking, poor memory, decreasing mental processing power and speed, a horrible decline in my appearance as to be disfigured. THIS IS NO PLACEBO! I look again like a drug addict, my right eye has become puffy and the eyelid drooping from excess orbital fat, I had a huge outburst of fresh pimples a week ago, the cystic kind, that are finally starting to die down. Note that prior to the relapses, I had not gained hardly any new pimples for months, it was quiet. Worst of all, I got 3 white hairs!!!! This was a week after relapsing. And before I started the 8 months streak, I remember having one white hair after relapsing, and on my streak, I had zero white hairs. This freaked me out, imagine getting white hairs at the age of 21, when you are supposed to be in your prime. Ofc, I already knew that masturbation ages you more quickly, but this made it all the more real. This is an outrage, and I vowed after plucking a white hair, that I would never pmo again. I am not willing to destroy myself I will also have to abstain from sex for many years, hopefully for the rest of my twenties, as any type of ejaculation weakens me and i do not trust myself to always withhold from ejaculation during sex. From the inception of when I started the insidious practice, I seemed to be exponentially more affected than my peers. Somehow, my body pushes back and produces the most horrible of symptoms and deforms me. I compare myself to a friend who developed well, grew to 6ft 6, was handsome, despite having not surpassed 30 days of nofap. For some, I suppose, their constitutions are stronger and can better handle emissions, but for others like myself, their weak constitutions render them incapable of tolerating even the slightest emissions. I, unlike my friend, was on death's doorstep. I remember about a year and half after commencing the practice vigorously 2-4 times a day, in my sophomore year of high school, becoming extremely sick with the flu, having chills, and feeling as though about to die. It was a violent sickness that could have killed me. I was coughing so much and so loudly during class that everyone around me was very worried and kept asking if I was okay. This practice destroyed my appearance, turning me into a monstrosity, a deranged subhuman, pitiful to look at. I do not know why, but my body reacts in the most violent way, much more severely compared to others. I have only to say that the effects of loss of semen for me are as severe as any allergic reaction. And so I have no doubt in my mind now that the release of semen in any way kills me, and utterly destroys me. I understand that it makes sense that this is so, for your semen is your very life force, and so you are losing part of your life, hence the name "La petite mort", or "little death", coined by the french referring to "the sensation of post orgasm as likened to death.". The only way to sufficiently give weight to the repugnance and detriment of this practice is to share what has been written by an eminent doctor before me. Understand that this practice is a violation against nature, and you are destroying your body and brain. Treat your body like a temple. You must understand that throughout the 1900s and for most of history, the practice of masturbation was railed against and looked upon with scorn, and people were warned of its dangers. But somehow, in the 1990s and onwards, masturbation became ushered in as healthy by doctors, and of course the gullible masses followed suit- they mocked and brushed aside the former decries of masturbation, labelling them as old wives tales and religious attempts to scare people. I have no doubt that the warnings against "self abuse" were for the purpose of preventing the youth from destroying themselves. Its sad that society encourages something so damaging and sadder still that few know the truth.