Obsessed with porn actress

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by dedrick68, Oct 12, 2019 at 8:34 AM.

  1. dedrick68

    dedrick68 New Fapstronaut

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    I have recently become obsessed with a porn actress. I wrote a book about the two of us, hoping I could find out why I am so obsessed and attracted to her. It did not help at all. Has this happened to anyone else?
     
  2. Xander_

    Xander_ Distinguished Fapstronaut

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    Probably the answer to this is simple, you're addicted to porn. And there happens to be a specific pornstar that lights up your fantasies and whatnot, this is just a lust created by porn addiction.

    I had tons of favorite porn actresses, still remember their names and my fav scenes yet i am 180+ days in my reboot, but the thing is i no longer feel the same about their porn vids anymore, it doesn't excite me anymore and im pretty much aware of it. Answer may be simple, you're obsessed because you're addicted to porn, lust drives you.
     
    need4realchg likes this.
  3. MrWes73

    MrWes73 New Fapstronaut

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    I totally understand you there. I also had a crush or was attracted to a pornstar or two. I get that thinking. But my advice is starting meeting up with real woman that are good partners in the long term. These pornstars, I don't want you to get invested in them too much because they are not the type of woman that are good for you in a relationship. They are just pretty and they have sex. That's basically it. There's more in a good women than that, and I'm sure you can get attracted to one of these good women if you stop with PMO and get to know and approach more women.
     
  4. Themadfapper

    Themadfapper Fapstronaut

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    It's just fantasy. Your mind is making it like there is something special with her to create excitement and to seem like you have some kind of relationship with her.

    This isn't' the first porn star you have been obsessed with is it? And eventually this one will be boring and you will at least look at others.
     
    Last edited: Oct 14, 2019 at 3:30 PM
  5. dedrick68

    dedrick68 New Fapstronaut

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    You are probably right. It is not the first one I have been crazy about, but this one seems more intense.
     
  6. Ronila

    Ronila Fapstronaut

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    I am a bit puzzled why your question is, "has this happened to someone else" and not why this is happening to me and how to begin to fix it.

    Obsession is rather simple to understand, people just do not take the time to explore their mind and understand it.
    By definition being obsessed is when someone spends disproportional amount of time doing something, to the point where this activity or thinking about it displaces others or everything else.
    Obsession is not an addiction, it is a behavior pattern that people develop.

    Generally speaking, obsessive behavior indicates lack of relationships, friends, minimal interaction with others and isolation. These circumstances are required for obsession and also abuse to develop as well
    Let me explain this visually - Lets say we have an average married person - has a wife, a job, family and friends. He is constantly interacting with them, they constantly keep him emotionally grounded.
    If he begins doing something unusual, like sitting in his office for hours, where he usually spent this time with others, then those others notice and they talk to him. Person is able to quickly adjust and evaluate.
    If person lives a healthy life, then he is constantly getting feedback from others. This feedback helps shape behavior and prevents problems in their infancy.

    If on the other hand we have a person who is rarely in some significant interpersonal interactions, someone who is so "independent" he can spend hours or days locked up in his house or room and noone would dare to say - what is going on? then you have the environment to develop, obsessive and addictive behaviors, among other emotional and psychological problems.

    Having an obsession means you lost your priorities, you lost sense of direction, and there is noone there to see it and help you correct.
    Obsession needs time, allot of it, if you have an active and fulfilling life - you have no time for obsession or addiction.

    So you have allot of time, but not much to do, so you do whatever feels best.
     

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