NoFap

  1. Welcome to NoFap! We have disabled new forum accounts from being registered for the time being. In the meantime, you can join our weekly accountability groups.
    Dismiss Notice

Old Newbie

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by Davidphd1866, Oct 16, 2017.

  1. Oct 16, 2017 #1
    Davidphd1866

    Davidphd1866 Fapstronaut

    705
    997
    93
    Hello Everyone,

    Thank you for welcoming me to this group. I am an older guy (54) who has squandered countless hours.....dollars.....intimacy......productivity.......health....you name it while masturbating to porn.

    It's time to stop.

    I look forward to reading the posts of so many of you, and perhaps to add some of my own.

    I live in Los Angeles and welcome anyone who lives locally to say hello. It's good to know there are others fighting the same fight.

    David
     
    Davidphd1866, Oct 16, 2017
    Davidphd1866, Oct 16, 2017
    #1
  2. Oct 17, 2017 #2
    Deleted Account

    Deleted Account Guest

    Deleted Account, Oct 17, 2017
    Deleted Account, Oct 17, 2017
    #2
    vxlccm likes this.
  3. Oct 18, 2017 #3
    Davidphd1866

    Davidphd1866 Fapstronaut

    705
    997
    93
    Thanks L. I appreciate the warm welcome. I have been VERY impressed with the site's carefully prepared material for newbies. It's been easy to find good stuff for the beginner. Tons of the obvious questions already answered.

    I really like how you choose to use lower case letters for pmo. Success is a decision, truth be told. And it's clear you have made that decision.

    Can you comment on the advantages/disadvantages of including the "o" in the pmo abstinence? I am sure it all depends on the individual, but I'd appreciate your comments as to why you are also abstaining from orgasms as well.

    Take care,

    David
     
    Davidphd1866, Oct 18, 2017
    Davidphd1866, Oct 18, 2017
    #3
  4. Oct 18, 2017 #4
    Deleted Account

    Deleted Account Guest

    @Davidphd1866

    David,

    I'm putting this inside a trigger warning out of an abundance of caution. Considering the topics that NoFap requires us to talk about there really isn't anything in here that's a "trigger" until it's put all together.

    Thanks for the question. Mostly I say thanks because it's made me reflect introspectively on the "why" of no orgasms. At first, it was just because that was what is recommended in a hard reboot. So, it seemed a logical way to do it. But, for me and for a long time, pmo all seemed like one thing. Very difficult to see the difference between them. As I've put a few 24 hours behind me, I'm better able to see that p,m & o are in fact three different things. For many, they just want to stop the masturbation to porn. But, for me there was no masturbation without porn.

    Secondly, on a more logical level, an orgasm releases addicting chemicals such as norepinephrine, oxytocin, vasopressin, nitric oxide and serotonin which is just going to make me want to do that again. Wanting another orgasm is most likely going to make me want to pmo as that is both the fastest way and the way to get the unrealistic images that continue the pmo cycle.

    Lastly I'm doing no orgasms because of PIED. After a few weeks, I've noticed that I'm getting nocturnal erections more frequently, a "stiffy" in my pants from time to time when seeing a real life guy that is good looking. PIED was a huge problem for me, real life just couldn't compete. My partner and I have been together for more than 30 years and although sex with him is great, I'm sure you can imagine it doesn't compete with the images from online porn.

    I really want to get rid of PIED. I know it's PIED because when I would start a porn vid I'd get an erection virtually right away. But, when having real life sex, it was very common for it to remain limp. Even though I don't have a 90 day goal during this hard reboot, I'm hoping that the reboot will help or eliminate the PIED.

    I don't have the problem with infidelity that some on here do. My partner and I have been in an open relationship since day one. The only modification we've made to that arrangement has been that condoms are required for any sex outside the relationship. But, with PIED, sex outside the relationship hasn't happened in a very long time. I don't really need that embarrassment.

    Hope that wasn't too much information for such a simple question. Please, remember, that is just my experience, strength and hope. Your mileage may vary and if you find an answer more in line with your life and experience, it's all good.

    Keep coming back,

    L
     
    Deleted Account, Oct 18, 2017
    Deleted Account, Oct 18, 2017
    #4
  5. Oct 18, 2017 #5
    Davidphd1866

    Davidphd1866 Fapstronaut

    705
    997
    93
    Thank you "Stop"! First, I appreciate that you took time to carefully answer my question. Second, you wrote a very clear and concise response that I can easily understand and agree with. Third, you shared something personal about your struggle. I admire and respect a man who shows genuine courage like you have.

    I think I share the same thoughts you do. I have exhibited signs of PIED with my wife. My PMO has destroyed much of the intimacy she and I had. It's amazing she has taken to it so well. The only thing is I think she blames my blood pressure meds and doesn't realize what I have done. I am on this journey because I MUST......for the sake of my wife AND me. However, i want my recover to be a surprise gift for her.

    I am headed out of town for a few days and will not have access to a computer. (good and bad) It means no porn....but it also means I will be away from this group for about five days. Thanks again for being such a good help.

    David
     
    Davidphd1866, Oct 18, 2017
    Davidphd1866, Oct 18, 2017
    #5

Share This Page