On my path...

[daftvoodoo]

Hello everyone,

I am two weeks into recovery, today is exactly 14 days since I started. I already feel better than before, this is my longest streak and I am not stopping. My problem is that I still watch porn sometimes when have urges. I'm not on that level of self discipline yet. I didn't relapse, I turn it off after a few minutes, but I feel bad after even watching it because I really want to be porn free. Feelings of shame and betrayal of myself occurs after watching it. In those moments I focus on positives and I say to myself that at least I didn't relapse. This stuff is devil's work. It plays with you when you are on your lowest, using most shallow feelings and emotions. I wanna be PM free, so did I broke my streak? Did I fail? I don't wanna think like that and I think that those are moments of weakness. If anyone reading this is in similar situation, leave a message so we can help each other thru this path. I am devoted to this once and for all, benefits are great even now. I want my future back.

Good luck to everyone,
Stefan

 

[Myfortress]

You did not break your streak. You are however on dangerous ground. You have to stop feeding your brain with porn. Your brain has been conditioned that when I see porn I get pleasure... It takes time to stop it. Even after you stop, the images and fantasies run wild for a time. It is the stuff of the devil and you can lose the shame and keep moving forward. Where are you on your spiritual journey? I am a member of the Christian group on this site and they have active members that can help encourage and build you up when you are slipping.