NoFap

  1. Welcome to NoFap! We have disabled new forum accounts from being registered for the time being. In the meantime, you can join our weekly accountability groups.
    Dismiss Notice

Open Relationships (advice?)

Discussion in 'Dating during a Reboot' started by Deleted Account, Sep 2, 2019.

  1. Sep 2, 2019 #1
    Deleted Account

    Deleted Account Guest

    Thoughts?

    For those that don't know, its when you're in a relationship and having sex but both parties can have sex with other people. But can't have emotional feelings w these other parties.

    Im seeing somebody rn and the sex is good, mainly bc the way i set it up. She knows about PIED and has an IUD. So im just mad busy re-wiring my brain back & its all about progress. It's not fully there but if you get practice every day, you'll get there (i hope). I'm more on the side of "below average" at sex versus PIED/incompetent. Which I'll take. I just don't last long and if its the 3rd or 4th time in one day my erection won't be as hard.

    Plus i seem happier and more centered & less stressed while being w her, if that amounts you anything. Shes cool, she talks alot but shes cool. Theres pros and cons w everybody

    Now, check this. You know when you're watching porn and it's basic. Then you keep doing it, you'll get bored and slowly escalate in porn genres/categories. Wouldn't it be the same theory w one person's body?

    For the record, idk what I'm doing. She brought up the open rltp idea drunk asf (we're single) & I'm on board w it except the part of her sleeping w others. That really bugs me thinking aboit it, plus we couldnt have unprotected sex anymore bc the guys shes having sex w would most likely have STDs. But i would wear a condom on other girls if i was in a open rltp.

    Should i bring this up again? There was another instance where she got mad at me bc i was "looking to have sex w other girls", which wasnt the case. I dont wanna hurt her feelings.

    She brought up open rltps bc she understood that guys have sex on a physical level mainly while girls mainly have sex on an emotional level.
     
    Deleted Account, Sep 2, 2019
    Deleted Account, Sep 2, 2019
    #1
  2. Sep 2, 2019 #2
    Haddock

    Haddock Fapstronaut

    291
    494
    63
    You're basically asking if it is possible to be sexually happy if you stick to one woman : for instance your wife. The answer is "yes".

    Guys can have sex at an emotional level.

    I think that your idea is to justify a behavior because of our nature. Although there is the Coolidge effect (which is what you described with the idea of changing partners), this reasoning can lead you where you do not want. If we are driven by our primal instincts then why not watching P ?
     
    Haddock, Sep 2, 2019
    Haddock, Sep 2, 2019
    #2
  3. Sep 11, 2019 #3
    Anytime Hugzy

    Anytime Hugzy New Fapstronaut

    3
    1
    3
    Wow, quite a deep post.

    First impression whilst reading your post was that what girls say and what they really want are often completely different things. The key here is to read her subcommunications (I think she really likes you and is just testing you), but it is something only you can probably read whilst dealing with her in person (almost impossible on an online forum through a 3rd person recount).

    Anyway, my 2cents:

    \

    depends on your chemistry. On average, yes, your interest will diminish over time. If you guys have low chemistry, it goes away FAST

    But if/when you meet that person that you have naturally crazy chemistry with (emotional people call it "soul mate", statistically it's roughly 1/16), sex just gets better and better. And you get to explore your sexual fantasies together (a REALLY fulfilling experience)

    I just wanna say I applauded you when I read that... just don't get that level of humility these days *thumbs up emoji


    hahaha... be careful catching 'em feels.

    nope, like i said, girls change their minds 24/7, bringing it up will sub-communicate to her that you have been overthinking it.

    Instead, YOU should take the lead and take the relationship where YOU want to go.

    Do you want an open relationship? Do you like her enough to go exclusive? Be honest, she will respect you for it.

    You will live at peace with it.

    Let us know how you go!
     
    Anytime Hugzy, Sep 11, 2019
    Anytime Hugzy, Sep 11, 2019
    #3

Share This Page