I dont think ive ever heard of a relapse how i relapsed. I been on the forums trying to help people out since ive been doing a lot of research and watching videos on various topics while browsing all the info on your brain on porn. I came across one post that reminded me of my situation. I posted the advice and have been posting back and forth with this individual. I started to feel triggered based on all the information because it started reminding me of my situation. I went to go pee and when i was peeing i noticed semen leaking out when i finished. Went to youtube to try and get some answers from the channels ive been educating myself with and for someone reason in that search was a Playlist of feet videos. I clicked one and it was a dominant humiliation video and just by watching and listening i ended up O'ing. I couldnt believe just by watching and listening that happened. I dont even know what to make of it. Worried about mu set back but also realized most ppl relapse. Its what i learn from the relapse and applying it. Not sure how far i set myself back but it was an important lesson. Wothout touching O is crazy can anyone give insight
Orgasim without touch
- Thread starter Aba0504
- Start date
CaLm from cn
New Fapstronaut
This sounds terrible, but I want to tell you that everything is about porn addiction. Psychological problems are greater than physiological problems. Yes, you only have one way to quit. Your body is very sensitive to pornography. You need a period of desensitization, during which includes staying away from all pornographic content, active exercise, and being healthy. Diet, learn knowledge related to quitting. But don't worry and be firm in your position that you want to quit, no matter what setbacks and difficulties you encounter. May you succeed soon.
CaLm from cn
New Fapstronaut
I can't speak English. This is a translation software. If there are any mistakes in the vocabulary, please understand.
freshstart211
Fapstronaut
This is normal, it happens to me still. I notice if I am extra emotional, it is more likely to happen. When I am feeling grounded, happy, and overall positive, it won't happen. But if I am emotionally triggered, not even from sexual stimuli per se, it is far more likely to happen.
Especially after holding out from O for long periods of time.
I am 13 months into this journey, and it still happens to me, but far less often because as our brains heal, we handle emotions better, and as we handle emotions better, this happens less.
From all of my research it is completely normal and in time it will stop.
Do you have PE issues? I find it is more common with people who orgasm too easily, versus the users that have trouble orgasming without porn.
Especially after holding out from O for long periods of time.
I am 13 months into this journey, and it still happens to me, but far less often because as our brains heal, we handle emotions better, and as we handle emotions better, this happens less.
From all of my research it is completely normal and in time it will stop.
Do you have PE issues? I find it is more common with people who orgasm too easily, versus the users that have trouble orgasming without porn.
I do have PE issues. It was just crazy how 30 secs of the video made me O like that. Youre right that ive been not O'ing for a extended period of time and that inwas all built up for release. Its a relapse none the less not happy about it but not gonna beat myself up about it. I think a lot of it was also built up tension because my girlfriends been away for 3 weeks and despite having PIED i still use viagara to have sex and i think when the video started i just O'ed. Any other info you can give and also if you have PE how are you working on bettering it
freshstart211
Fapstronaut
So it sounds like your nervous system is in a heightened state right now.
In my experience, (I am dealing with PAWS) I am in stage 2. And it started with immense brain fog that lasted about 30 days, and increased rem sleep that has now been going on for 65 days. Then, when the brain fog died down, it turned into racing thoughts, about anything and everything. I can't slow down mentally, always thoughts. Then, when the evening comes, usually around 5pm I crash, run out of energy, then putter my way through the night until bedtime.
When you're in the brain fog stage, your nervous system is dull, low, weak, so there is no urge to orgasm or look at sexual stimuli.
When my mind turned into racing thoughts, I can orgasm meditating, literally thinking about nothing, it will suddenly get hard and if I don't go do something, I will orgasm. That starts when abstaining 3 days or more, days 1 and 2 it does not happen.
Throughout my recovery, I could orgasm to sexual stimuli without touching in waves. But when I was in a neutral or down mental state (balanced or dull nervous system) I couldn't orgasm hands free (not only couldn't I, but it was the last thing on my mind, sex was of no concern to me at all), when I was in a bad state, or heightened nervous system/mental activity, I could very easily.
The point is, your nervous system is going through ups and downs, dulls and excitement. Once it finds it's balance, you likely won't be so sensitive and PE will diminish greatly and continue to improve over time.
I find orgasming is good for you in a balanced state if you don't suffer from the chaser effect, and it does not induce fantasizing, urges, or a need to orgasm again shortly after.
Once I beat the chaser effect in the acute phase, I started orgasming with my wife every 3–7 days. If I am in a hyper state, I may do 3 or 4 days. If I am in a low state of recovery, I can wait longer.
This is a happy balance that:
DOES NOT result in bad behaviors after orgasm BUT DOES relax me, keep me on track with my recovery, and experience real intimate sexual experiences to help rewire. As long as you are good with orgasms at a moderate frequency, and it does not result in negative effects, I personally believe it is very helpful in the process.
When I first started to refrain from O, I would go as long as I could, every time, of course, and that got rid of my chaser effect. But if you are further along, I don't think it is ALWAYS helpful to abstain as long as you can, I think it depends on the person and their issues/negative or positive behaviors post orgasm.
Don't hesitate to ask anything, of course every one is different, has different histories, and different recovery trajectories, but I have been very mindful of my recovery, took notes, and research quite a bit, cheers!
In my experience, (I am dealing with PAWS) I am in stage 2. And it started with immense brain fog that lasted about 30 days, and increased rem sleep that has now been going on for 65 days. Then, when the brain fog died down, it turned into racing thoughts, about anything and everything. I can't slow down mentally, always thoughts. Then, when the evening comes, usually around 5pm I crash, run out of energy, then putter my way through the night until bedtime.
When you're in the brain fog stage, your nervous system is dull, low, weak, so there is no urge to orgasm or look at sexual stimuli.
When my mind turned into racing thoughts, I can orgasm meditating, literally thinking about nothing, it will suddenly get hard and if I don't go do something, I will orgasm. That starts when abstaining 3 days or more, days 1 and 2 it does not happen.
Throughout my recovery, I could orgasm to sexual stimuli without touching in waves. But when I was in a neutral or down mental state (balanced or dull nervous system) I couldn't orgasm hands free (not only couldn't I, but it was the last thing on my mind, sex was of no concern to me at all), when I was in a bad state, or heightened nervous system/mental activity, I could very easily.
The point is, your nervous system is going through ups and downs, dulls and excitement. Once it finds it's balance, you likely won't be so sensitive and PE will diminish greatly and continue to improve over time.
I find orgasming is good for you in a balanced state if you don't suffer from the chaser effect, and it does not induce fantasizing, urges, or a need to orgasm again shortly after.
Once I beat the chaser effect in the acute phase, I started orgasming with my wife every 3–7 days. If I am in a hyper state, I may do 3 or 4 days. If I am in a low state of recovery, I can wait longer.
This is a happy balance that:
DOES NOT result in bad behaviors after orgasm BUT DOES relax me, keep me on track with my recovery, and experience real intimate sexual experiences to help rewire. As long as you are good with orgasms at a moderate frequency, and it does not result in negative effects, I personally believe it is very helpful in the process.
When I first started to refrain from O, I would go as long as I could, every time, of course, and that got rid of my chaser effect. But if you are further along, I don't think it is ALWAYS helpful to abstain as long as you can, I think it depends on the person and their issues/negative or positive behaviors post orgasm.
Don't hesitate to ask anything, of course every one is different, has different histories, and different recovery trajectories, but I have been very mindful of my recovery, took notes, and research quite a bit, cheers!
I have been in since 2017. 39 days in, without an O, I watched one humiliation video and promptly came in my pants. No touching. In total I have had 4 wet dreams. … and a few dozen “accidents” where I had an O without touching myself. Sometimes it was porn, sometimes triggered by a woman or a situation. But every time there was fabric involved. It never happened while completely naked, without something touching my penis.
My point in sharing this: it’s normal. Or, at least, you’re not the only one. But it is a relapse - because you looked at porn. Or, a “slip” if you prefer. Today is a new day. Don’t look at porn. Don’t worry too much about cumming without touching. Do worry about that porn, especially that genre of porn, and how much of an affect it had on you.
I still slip with touching and have accidents without touching. But I have only looked at porn four times, briefly each time, since January 25, 2021 and I feel really good about that.
My point in sharing this: it’s normal. Or, at least, you’re not the only one. But it is a relapse - because you looked at porn. Or, a “slip” if you prefer. Today is a new day. Don’t look at porn. Don’t worry too much about cumming without touching. Do worry about that porn, especially that genre of porn, and how much of an affect it had on you.
I still slip with touching and have accidents without touching. But I have only looked at porn four times, briefly each time, since January 25, 2021 and I feel really good about that.
First id like to say thank you for responding and sharing your knowledge and experiences. I was pretty good with the post acute withdrawls but i just got triggered by that one post and the lekaong of semen when i went to the bathroom. Ive been able to control the urgers but yesterday i did cave. I think the withdrawls are not going anywhere for a long time. Im 36 with about 18 years of PMO, into fetishes, death grip, and PMO marathons at times. So to say the least im in the deep end. I have a partner and we have sex but i use viagaras. My gf is ny first sexual partner and i lost my virginity in September to here. While rebooting i use viagaras and my orgasim were with her having sex. The first couple of times i O'd really fast and it was getting better. I did relapse in a sense where i looked at twitter for findom and humiliation and feet stuff but never acted on it and that time i didnt O. I get what youre saying my brain is all over the place with the urges and no O's. I was at a point where i was like sex is good i dont need to PMO. I dont know how to get rid of PE.
freshstart211
Fapstronaut
Happy to share whatever I can.
You sound a lot like me, I started around the same age and quit when I was 36. I wasn't as heavily into the activity as you though, I would engage for 20-30 minutes a day, once a day. Sometimes but rarely twice a day.
I have been with a woman pretty much my entire life as well.
With that said, in regard to your comment on PE, I really think it comes down to a heightened nervous system.
So you quit about a year ago?
What have your symptoms been like? Do you have PAWS?
What are your current symptoms?
How often do you orgasm?
How often alone?
How often with your partner?
You sound a lot like me, I started around the same age and quit when I was 36. I wasn't as heavily into the activity as you though, I would engage for 20-30 minutes a day, once a day. Sometimes but rarely twice a day.
I have been with a woman pretty much my entire life as well.
With that said, in regard to your comment on PE, I really think it comes down to a heightened nervous system.
So you quit about a year ago?
What have your symptoms been like? Do you have PAWS?
What are your current symptoms?
How often do you orgasm?
How often alone?
How often with your partner?
I think my PE comes down to O'ing really fast when i use to PMO. Just wanted that quick dopamine hit i dont even think it was about the P at this point. no i quit august 26 of this year. I do get cravings to watch femdom, findom, fetish stuff. I mean i dont have brain fog or anything like thar. Feels like in a flat line. I O a couple times a week with my partner never alone.
Ydhdbdbdb
Fapstronaut
I am a serious case of porn addiction. I have been addicted for 12 years, 3 to 4 times a day. I reached a point where porn stopped exciting me and I masturbated if my penis is limp even for porn. In fact, I have been on a flat line for years even before I started abstinence
freshstart211
Fapstronaut
Everyone can heal, the unknown is how long it will take.
Ydhdbdbdb
Fapstronaut
Could you tell me about your case?
Yea i can tell you about my case. Started watching porn when i was 17 or 18 because thats when i got a computer at home. Started off with normal stuff escalated into foot fetish stuff, which led to femdom, lef into findom, humiliation etc. I even went and paid women to make me their slave and worhsip their feet and humiliate me and everything. Everytime i went to those sessions and left i would be like wtf am i doing because it didnt do anything for me. I think by my early 20s i developed pied. Never did anything about it though just thought i had ED. Never went to thr doctor or anything not like it would of mattered. I would fap at least once a day and like i mentioned at first i could get an erection to porn but by my 30s (36 now) couldnt even get hard to porn of any sort. Definitely always would browse on endless mount of time trying to find the right fix. Deathgrip was definitely there and by now i was just fapping a flaccid penis and couldnt get hard at all but still kept going. Some days into my 30s i would M multiple times but i would get an erection after Oing and would go again right after. Forgot to mention i would O as quick as possible im sure thats why i have premature ejaculation. Ive cut porn out of my life since august 26 with one relapse of PMO but thats the one without touch. I do slip up here and there and look at twitter findom stuff but never PMO to it. I've been having sex with my gf using viagra 100 mg and this weekend even got 2 erections just by making out but werent the hardest erections. My PE is there because i didnt last long but im still gonna keep rebooting with my partner and quit pmo and p forever. Spending more time with my gf and replacing bad habits with new habits.