Over 20 virgins?

Discussion in 'Off-topic Discussion' started by pauts, Feb 1, 2014.

  1. pauts

    pauts Fapstronaut

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    Why are you a virgin over 20 y/o? You didn't have a chance, no girls liked you, were you shy?
    I guess for me it's partially because of porn and fapping. I was also shy, but that was mostly middle school. But girls didn't like me till 11th grade, I was 17 at that time and already hooked on porn for many years, so when I had a chance with girls I wasn't interested. At all - 0 interest. And it continued to this day, I wasted dozens upon dozens of possibilities and so I'm a 23 y/o virgin.
     
  2. I'm 18 and never had sex, actually the worst I've ever done was feel a girl's but and of course I've kissed, while I have had relationships, about 3, they were always short lived and full of frustrations and hesitations or I did to much and was immediately ashamed. I'm just saying your not alone. I'm new here so I don't have all the answers, but I do want to thank you for posting since I was able to adopt my own signature based on yours. So at least you can walk away from today saying you helped someone else track their goal, also losing your virginity isn't the most important thing, it's the getting over the fear and roadblocks that make you not care or isolate yourself from it like I've been doing and your doing that's the problem. I don't know if this helped, but what I'm trying to say is don't go looking to have intercourse, find out the problem that's stopping you and then solve it so that when it comes up again you can respond in a more healthy way.
     
  3. Vortis

    Vortis Fapstronaut

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    Yup, I'm in that boat. 22 and a virgin. Part of being able to do this whole thing is remove the pressure of losing it.

    I definitely had plenty of opportunities but never understood why I shied away from and sometimes completely avoided them. Once I found out about Nofap everything made sense, so hang in there and don't put too much stress on yourself to lose it.
     
  4. pauts

    pauts Fapstronaut

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    Agreed. Before I felt a big pressure to lose it. But now it's gone. No one actually cares about if someone else is a virgin, so in reality all the pressure was just from myself.
     
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  5. Kenworth_95

    Kenworth_95 Fapstronaut

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    Hey so are you in Anonymous or what?? Screw the Power craved men and crazies who run the system! Haha..
     
  6. zoe

    zoe New Fapstronaut

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    I'm a virgin who will be turning 20 in a few months
     
  7. premmyprem2013

    premmyprem2013 Fapstronaut

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    i was a virgin until i got married. best decision i made in my life. everyone has different beliefs ideas of being morally clean. my wife and i chose to not have sex until we got married. i would encourage anyone else to do this as well. you only lose it once. choose carefully who that person is.
     
  8. Silver

    Silver Fapstronaut

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    Technically I'm not a virgin. I had sex two times (I was 19) with the same girl both lasting about 20-30 seconds. Didn't orgasm and too drunk to really remember the "deed". So although I'm technically not a virgin, I didn't really have sex either. I'm 24 now and if you'd ask me how sex is, I really couldn't tell you.

    My problem are girls with experience. Although most girls 'say' they like virgin men, most of them prefer someone with some experience. My ex couldn't handle the fact that I had no clue what I was doing and she didn't really try to help me either. I tried telling her I (basically) was a virgin. At first she didn't even believe me. So I told her the truth and she convinced herself that I knew what I was doing:confused:.

    My problems run so deep that I basically need a girlfriend to build trust and create a sexual environment where I feel safe. Sex scares me because it's still an unknown area. I hear people telling me "it's just sex", yeah well it feels like i'm the 8 year old kid who's dead-scared of a rollercoaster and know's that one day he will ride the scary coaster.

    And after I "lost my virginity" I tried having sex with two more girls. I did have a wiskey dick with the first, but the second one was my ex-girlfriend. We tried having sex for weeks, but I just couldn't get it up. The fear I will end up in bed with someone and that happens again just scares me to death...

    So the nofapp makes sure that my porn addiction is gone, but the real "test" is still on the horizon. Losing your virginity was something I looked forward at, now (in all honesty) i'm actually scared of the moment. I know I need to let it go, but it's hard (no pun intended).
     
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  9. artsoppan93

    artsoppan93 Fapstronaut

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    I am 20 and have never even kissed a girl! What I have done is going to a Thai massage place and have gotten a handjob three times! :confused:
    I have never kissed a girl but three different women have stroke my dick for money I feel very ashamed! :( I don´t ever want to go there again!

    But I don´t know does that count as having sex?
    All I can say is that I feel pretty pathetic.
     
  10. psycho

    psycho Fapstronaut

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    good to hear, im still 18, but also never kissed a girl. I know its nothing to be ashamed of, but i have enough friends, who had multiple, an uncountable ammount of GFs, one had even 3 at one time...

    Thats what encourages me too. I dont want to lose my virginity until i marry, but also i dont want to have a GF as long as im fapping! i first want to be sure that i never start again with this, until i get a GF. But when i get a GF i want her to be my wife, first relationship shall be the only one, and last forever.
    huh i feel like i sound really... weird? :D

    greetings: psycho, blessings to you all
     
  11. owtu

    owtu Fapstronaut

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    I may take the gold on this thread. I'm a 25 year old virgin, never been kissed, never had a girlfriend. I've always been very very shy. I've dated 3 girls but not for enough time that I could refer to them as my exes. I have self-esteem problems and I always feel like I'm not good enough for any girl or that they won't like me because I may not be good looking enough. On top of all of this I'm a math nerd who's studying computer engineering.
     
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  12. alexs

    alexs Fapstronaut

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    u can count me in...i am 26 and a virgin....i dont know why....maybe it was because of the way i was brought up and my parents....maybe it was because of my looks...ha ha ...who knows...
     
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  13. nobingeing

    nobingeing Fapstronaut

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    I am relieved to know that i am not alone. You should too!

    21 year old, never had a girlfriend, never "officially" dated, and URGHHH honestly-impatiently waiting for the right one.

    Call me anything you want, but i think i would value the first kiss and the first sexual experience to be with your wife. I imagine the feeling in my mind. Your first kiss. At your wedding. In front of all your family and friends. That first kiss. That feeling. Just take the time now to imagine that feeling. The value of that experience. WOW. THAT FEELS IS PRICELESS DUDES!!!!!

    That is one reason why i want to embark on nofap and succeed so badly. But i will need the support that this community can offer so i would not lose track of my goal and start to sway in my thoughts, settling for anything less than a series of first times with my one and only girl :)

    In today's society, this may indeed be rare. i want to be that rare 1% of society. such that my happiness would be top 1% of the world. HAHAHA

    Push on fellow fapstronauts! Peace!^^
     
  14. aaron92

    aaron92 Fapstronaut

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    I'm 21 and I'm still a virgin- it's all very well and good for people who voluntarily stay on their own, but when you're a straight guy with a big sex drive... It makes it even more difficult to give up PMO
     
  15. pursuitofchocolate

    pursuitofchocolate Fapstronaut

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    I'm 24 and I'm a virgin. I'm surprised that in this day and age there are some of us in this world. I thought I was all alone. I don't think it is shameful. Don't blame "bad" looks for something that has happened in your life. Would you rather have lost your virginity on a drunken night where neither of you could fully experience the situation or remember it?

    Even though other people can be casual about sex or the media portrays virgins as a bunch of promise ring wearing dorks--I really think it doesn't fucking matter. Out of all of the things on our lives this shouldn't define us. Engineering and math show you've worked hard on your intelligence. You don't need one thrust into another persons body to discount what you are, what you've worked for. You are more than just a virgin---lol we all are.
     
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  16. Spartan

    Spartan Fapstronaut

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    Yo PC: that means you should change your name to "PureChocolate" ;)
     
  17. pursuitofchocolate

    pursuitofchocolate Fapstronaut

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    Well, I'm clearly on this site. So, I wouldn't really say pure. I'd say chocolatewithsomeimpurities,buttryingtoworkonthat. Nah too long of a nick.
     
  18. Morrow

    Morrow Fapstronaut

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    In the most likely case I will be an over 20 virgin in 3 month, haha. Hottest thing I ever done was playing footsie with a girl I was in love with (what she never came to know though)... Well I dont think its a shame or something, I just think that it will be strange in several years, when I date a girl and have to tell her.
    I find it interesting what some of you posted about having no sex before marriage. Im not religious at all, but I still like this picture of finding that ONE and only girl you want to be with forever and want to have children with and everything. Because in my life everything has to make sense, and I see no (higher) sense in being together with a girl you dont want to found a family with. When I would find somebody like this I would like to marry her without even kissing her before. But it sounds a bit unlikely to me. Because she would have to have the same feelings, otherwise it would be a bit out of balance dont you think? And who has?
     
  19. Rafa

    Rafa Fapstronaut

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    Interesting topic, i'm also a 25 years old virgin and i had never kissed a girl and i had a lot of opportunities when i was younger. Last week when i started dating a girl i met on a app i had my first kiss,i know that being virgin doesn't matter. If you were having sex with girls that are just a one night stand would that make you happy? Well...for me not, i also wanna find a special girl that i really want to be with.
     
  20. noLookingBack

    noLookingBack New Fapstronaut

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    Dont worry about being a virgin. Gain self control and confidence will come and you can start seeing woman for who they really are and meeting a girl that holds the same self control and values as you do. I didn't wait until I was married but have only been with my wife who was my girlfriend at the time. We were both virgins and I am so thankful, it has definitely provided a good foundation for our relationship knowing that neither one of us had been with anybody else. For me it would be hard to look at her and know that somebody else has been with her, especially when things aren't going well, I could almost see using it against her or vice versa but maybe thats because I am a jealous guy when it comes to my girl.
     

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