Over 3 years free of PM

Discussion in 'Success Stories' started by Wade W. Wilson, Apr 3, 2021.

  1. Wade W. Wilson

    Wade W. Wilson Fapstronaut

    Hey everyone, I just wanted to share my success story with you all. I started this journey a bit over 3 years ago and it has been an uphill battle. It wasn't easy, but nothing easy is worth fighting for. There have been many challenges and I am sure there will be more ahead of me, but I have my foundation, my healthy habits, and most importantly support. My wife has been helping me on this journey. If anyone has any questions just ask, or send me a private message.

    Wish you all good luck and Stay Strong everyone.
  2. oe123

    oe123 Fapstronaut

    Congrats man, 3 years of pm is a incredible achievement. You are an inspiration to anyone who is struggling that you can win this battle. Well done!!
  3. Tips for getting past the first week
  4. how did you recover with your wife? In the beginning, What was your regimen like and what were the physical changes you noticed and when?
    Wade W. Wilson and archy0 like this.
  5. If I may ask you - how your wife reacted to your confession about addiction.
    Wade W. Wilson likes this.
  6. Cyberpunk3000

    Cyberpunk3000 Fapstronaut

    First of all Congratulations. You are slaying, my man. Jus Amazing to see someone beating this shit.
    I have some questions.

    1.Did you have PIED?
    How bad was it when you started?
    Have your recovered completely from it?
    How is your erection quality, sensitivity and stimulus response to your SO?

    2. Did you have PE and have you recovered from it?

    3.How is your refractory period? before and after recovery? Can you go more than once in a single day? And how often can you in a week? Do you feel exhaustion after a few times in a week? Or you seem to be back functioning back at optimal levels?

    4. How was you libido when you started nofap and how is it now? Back to healthy optimal levels?

    4. How long did it take for all of this restore, assuming you had them and recovered?

    5. How is your mood? Irritability?
    Anxiety, anhedonia?

    Sorry if my questions are too intrusive.
  7. archy0

    archy0 Fapstronaut

    In my opinion - best questions I have seen here!
    Wade W. Wilson and Cyberpunk3000 like this.
  8. Wade W. Wilson

    Wade W. Wilson Fapstronaut

    Thank you all for your responses, for your support, and for all the questions. I will be getting back to you all and answering all your questions. If you are interested in joining my discord and/or Facebook for some support message me for the links.

    Stay strong
  9. Wade W. Wilson

    Wade W. Wilson Fapstronaut

    It took time to recover with my wife. I had to earn her trust and it wasn't easy cause I lied to her for so many years. I had to be patient and make sure even when I was honest and she didn't trust me to stay patient, I had to remind myself that she had a reason not to trust me. I had to be honest with her about everything I did and I mean everything, which wasn't easy. The thing is I wasn't ready to tell her everything, what I mean to make proper disclosure, no one taught the right way and it came out trickle down, but I have a very understanding and supportive wife. She understood that knew that I told her the truth, cause what I told her she would never found out but I had to tell her, of course after lying to her for so long she still has doubt in her that I didn't tell her everything and I hope that one day she would believe me. We still have issues but we working on it. The most important thing is honesty and communication.

    I hope it answers your question. Stay strong.
  10. Wade W. Wilson

    Wade W. Wilson Fapstronaut

    Hey man,

    My wife reacted surprisingly better than I thought. Well, the thing is she caught me multiple times, and when she caught me last time she was done with me. She told me that she doesn't have anything to do with me and I can do whatever I want. The only thing she didn't want to traumatize our eldest before going to high school, cause she didn't want her grades to go down, so she said we will live together and play pretend. Well, I joined NoFap and started changing everything little by little, then she joined and we both started to educate ourselves about addiction and betrayal. I wish I had more information about disclosure cause the way I did it, I know now, wasn't good at all, but as I said earlier my wife is very supportive and understanding, honesty matters to her. The thing is everyone is different and it depends on the person if he/she can accept and understand what is porn addiction.

    I hope this helps, Stay strong.
    archy0 and NFGrad like this.
  11. Man, you are really lucky with your wife and her attitude, despite all this situation in your life. I'm asking, because confessing to my last SO about my past addiction, at the very beginning of our second stage of being closer together (we knew each other and stayed in contact for 8 months prior to this) caused the relationship to slowly dissolute with her withdrawing from me. I told her that it was already past issue because at the moment of confessing I was already 20 months into rebooting, with being clean and long streaks. Moment of confession was clearly a point of change in her behavior. She was probably thinking that I'm perv or something like that.
    I just needed to vent off.
    I'm glad that your marriage survived, you both are really blessed with true will to understand and support of each other.
    Wade W. Wilson likes this.
  12. greenishmoon

    greenishmoon Fapstronaut

    Woah man that's really rude of her...
    MeTP likes this.
  13. Wade W. Wilson

    Wade W. Wilson Fapstronaut

    Hey man, sorry for the late response, and your questions are not intrusive it's all good. I didn't understand some terms so I'll answer whatever I can right now and rest later.

    1.Did you have PIED?
    Yes, I did.

    How bad was it when you started?
    I don't remember when it started and how bad was. It was weird and I never thought it was connected to PM but I had problems getting erect as well to finish intercourse with my wife. When I started my recovery and learned more about it only then I knew that it was connected.

    Have your recovered completely from it?
    Yes I have.

    How is your erection quality, sensitivity and stimulus response to your SO?
    Really good, it's hard to describe but it's amazing. The thing is it's now only about stopping PMO, but connecting with your SO, getting vulnerable and intimate, and I don't mean sex, but finding intimacy on another level with your SO. Having this kind of connection makes our sex so amazing, and well the stimulus-response as well.

    2. Did you have PE and have you recovered from it?
    Not sure what PE stands for can you elaborate.

    3.How is your refractory period? before and after recovery? Can you go more than once in a single day? And how often can you in a week? Do you feel exhaustion after a few times in a week? Or you seem to be back functioning back at optimal levels?
    Everything is good I don't really pay attention and I can go once then once a day and my recovery is good. Listen you concentrating on sex too much, recovery is not just about getting your libido back and see how many times you can go a day or a week. I don't even think about it, for me, it was to change myself so I can be a better man. I am in control of my emotions and feelings, well still learning but getting better, also be in control of my mind, be healthy. Everything else like an intimate relationship with my wife is a bonus. Don't get me wrong, it is very important to me, but if I only was trying to do it just for sex and how many I can go a day, it's a wrong reason to stop, it could be one of the reasons, but there is so much to recovery.

    4. How was you libido when you started nofap and how is it now? Back to healthy optimal levels? How long did it take for all of this restore, assuming you had them and recovered?
    It was low, I didn't care about sex and only wanted to PMO. I am not sure how long exactly it took to restore, but I got it back. The thing is everyone is different and you can't compare to me or anyone else. However, I did start to see differences within a couple of months.

    5. How is your mood? Irritability?
    Anxiety, anhedonia?
    Much, much better than it was.

    I hope it helps. Also check out my Facebook page https://www.facebook.com/groups/133427017698388/, I post weekly videos there
    Stay strong
    Cyberpunk3000 likes this.
  14. Wade W. Wilson

    Wade W. Wilson Fapstronaut

    No problem, I understand we all need to vent. Sorry to hear about your SO, it could be really hard on them. I did get lucky with my wife, she was willing to listen and educate herself. That's the thing, our SO don't know, well not many people do, that PMO is a real problem, that's it's a real addiction. People think that's everyone does it, but at the same time don't want to talk about it. I wish you luck my friend.

    Check out my discord and Facebook for support and help.
    Discord: https://discord.gg/gXPuU9q.

    Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/groups/133427017698388/

    Stay strong.
    MeTP likes this.
  15. Cyberpunk3000

    Cyberpunk3000 Fapstronaut

    That's totally cool man. I know there were too many to answer. And thank you for taking your time to answer my questions.

    That's fucking amazing. Kudos man

    I get what you mean. To have an emotional bond on a deeper level during sex and not just the physical aspect of it.
    So you mean to say, rewiring with SO is crucial to recovery? Because right now am single. I am hoping for a recovery just through long abstinence.

    PE- Premature ejaculation(ejaculating within secs after penetration)
    DE- Delayed ejaculation(inability to ejaculate and orgasm during sex)

    And I jus want to clarify that, my questions are all about sex and physical capability. But it's not because I want to go multiple rounds day in day out, after recovery nor am doing this jus to have sex, am doing nofap to reach my full potential and also to be a better person. The only vice which I indulged in, was this and it's a filthy one and I don't identify myself with it anymore. My counter is in triple digits and have also started learning new things in my life. But I have a looong way to go as I believe am one of the severe and long rebooting case.

    I am very much into physical prowess is because I am a hypochondriac. I take care of my health as much as possible. Eat healthy, workout , neither drink nor smoke..... Despite that , by ignorance like many of us here, i fell into PMO cycle for almost a decade and continued without even knowing what it was doing to me and fried my brain and damaged my sexual functioning on all fronts. So for me, restoring my brain and my dick to its optimal level is my goal. I hope you understand how it would be for a hypochondriac.

    That's why I wanted to know how much recovery is possible on physical fronts to recover the body and brain to its homeostatic levels.

    When I question, If you could go at least two rounds in a day(I mean rarely or if you are SO wants it and be able to rise to the occasion without struggle on some rare occasions...not like a bunny doing it all day, all week, hope you get what I mean)
    It's like...if we will be able to function like a normal guy who didn't pmo and be able to connect and have regular healthy sex with his SO.
    Which is, easily get erections, have sex Without erection loss or ejaculation problems or looong refractory periods or no emotional connect during sex.
    I am not comparing as this disease and recovery is different for all of us. But getting positive answers for these questions helps me keep going. Possibly for others too.

    And it's really nice to know that you have a loving partner who helped you during these difficult times. That is really rare to come by.
    Last edited: Apr 11, 2021
  16. greenishmoon

    greenishmoon Fapstronaut

    I am specially interested in this point, if you would like to go further. How was it? How does it evolved?.
    Both of those.
    Phast likes this.
  17. MrErectileDysfunction

    MrErectileDysfunction New Fapstronaut

    Congrats man! Did you make out with your wife or see her naked during the process? Did you try karezza? How looked your relationship during this time? (I mean, was she giving you a handjob or sth?) No orgasm with your wife during this time?
    Wade W. Wilson likes this.
  18. Wade W. Wilson

    Wade W. Wilson Fapstronaut

    I apologize for the late response. During the whole recovery, from the start, I was intimate with my wife, we did have sex and yes I did see her naked, we did try something like karezza, but didn't last long. Our relationship had ups and down and she did not give me any handjobs, we had regular sex, well after we developed this amazing connection and intimacy I wouldn't call our sex regular.

    Listen, I hope I answered your questions, and I don't know how long you've been in recovery and how long you had tried and relapsed, but you don't need to worry about handjobs or anything like that. If you married or have a girlfriend you need to develop a healthy relationship with her, and that means to be honest and vulnerable, to be empathetic and understanding, to be patient. These days, my relationship with my wife is just so amazing, honestly I never even thought something like this could exist, it took a lot of time and work, and we still working on it. In the beginning, I also was thinking and rationalizing how and when I might be able to do it, maybe my wife could do it, or I can do it with her, but the longer I continue my recovery and changing my lifestyle I just don't even think about it no more. My wife did caress me and played with me down there, but never finished like that, it was just forplay.

    I hope this helps and if you are interested you can join my Facebook channel, I make and post videos about my journey as well as useful information and resources, I will be making a video about your question.

    If you have any more questions just ask me, Stay Strong.
    Anti-Hero likes this.

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