P.A.W.S. - what are they, cure, duration

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by Fenix Rising, May 12, 2019.

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  1. MeTP

    MeTP Fapstronaut

    I hope you will be good and don't give up.
     
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  2. Selfdiscovery

    Selfdiscovery Fapstronaut

    Short update:-

    Day#212(19.11.2021)

    7 months completely free from PM.No relapse at all.My mind doesn't look to watch P anymore.Urges are not there but I have to be very conscious whenever I'm at internet.

    Getting better slowly in many aspects such as sleep quality,energy levels,skin glow,hairs look and mood swings but PIED,PE,fatigue,WDs,no libido still persist.I have chose to rewire with my wife but still there are no positive outcomes regarding PIED,PE,libido.And any emission due to wet dream and trying to rewire with partner is hitting me badly.Withdrawal symptoms such as mild brain fog,leg pain,low mood,inrush and warmness across body comes back and I feel like hell for 2-3 days.Then things get better and I move on.Some of these symptoms are following:-
    • Backpain is much better.
    • Pain in knees.
    • Pain in lower part and feets.
    • Mood swings
    • Low mood
    • Fatigue
    • stomach upsets
    • Warmness across body
    • Mild brain fog
    • Uneasiness
    • Zero libido
    • Feeling unrest even after 7-8 hours sleep
    • Difficulty in waking up in morning
    • PE,PIED

    But above all ,going strong...waiting eagerly to recover and rewired.
     
    Last edited: Nov 19, 2021
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  3. OhWhenThe

    OhWhenThe Fapstronaut

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    Personally I don't really believe in the whole rewiring thing, at least not for severe cases during recovery. You need to unwire first, you can't do both together(not efficiently anyway). I understand that's not an easy thing to do when in a relationship though.
     
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  4. Selfdiscovery

    Selfdiscovery Fapstronaut

    It's very difficult to handle as there are not hard and fast way to go.Many had said rewiring is a must ,even ybop book also says one must rewire.There are a lot yt videos that says abstinance for 3-6 months first and then step towards rewiring.Do whatever natural(No PMO but intimacy with sex) you want to do but with a real person as it'll rewire you.

    Secondly,when you are married and with a person you can't let things go and do whatever you want.And even if you do,for how long you can ?? These are very difficult questions who's answers can be found by own experiences and situations.
    All this is very tough to handle at one time.So please leave and quit this addiction coz the consequences of it can cost heavy,very heavy.

    I'm eager and devastated at same time that why I indulged myself into this addiction? It has taken away a lot from me and really made me to crawl to move forward rather than smooth walk/run.

    It has been really tough and persevering till date for me.But yes now I have realised into what I was and what I can do and had done to me.So I'm internally self committed and motivated to throw this addiction away and make things better for myself.I'm certain that one day I'll cross the line and live a normal life.
    Thanks to all.
     
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  5. Cyberpunk3000

    Cyberpunk3000 Fapstronaut

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    I am 19 months free from porn.
    13 months from PMO.
    Last 6 months wetdreams free(though I had a minor spill in dream after the 6months but I controlled it before full effusion)

    Almost all of my mental symptoms have gone away anxiety, depression, insomnia (the worst of all),brain fog, forgetfulness, no energy, rage. Except maybe be mood swings.

    Sexually am still where you're at. No sign of improvement. No sign of libido, PIED, PE possibly persists.
    Except I have been getting weak morning wood.
    I guess I have a long way to go to recover my sexual function. At times, its daunting to think, if I will ever be back to normal and have a healthy sex life.

    Your mental problems will fade with time. So keep trucking. Wet dreams would be draining you for the first few months but then they don't affect after few months and even stop happening depending on your activities in the day.
     
    Last edited: Nov 21, 2021
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  6. Selfdiscovery

    Selfdiscovery Fapstronaut

    It's wonderful to know that you have crossed the line and recovery is possible.

    Things are strange for me,I get almost regular morning wood.Means after any emission,it goes away for 7-10 days and then again gets back.And I get it almost daily and it's like this since starting of these 7 months.At times it's very confusing if I'm in flatline or not? So I stopped thinking it at all.

    Main problem is my ED & PE.My erections whenever I'm with my partner has never been adequate.Sometimes they are better when I'm just cuddling,kissing and kind of foreplay but whenever I try to have sex or go for piv ,then I lose erection and come and it's been consistent like hell since these past 7 months.Which makes my recovery really tough and I have to chose very careful and calibrated path to move on.

    Yes most probably you are right that it's last thing in the line that recovers -libido and sexual function.Well that's what I guess too.
    And recovery is possible.You have come here and achieved a lot.Just think some 19 months back you would have never believed that you would come this far? So hold on and keep going ,you'll recover fully.

    Regarding PE,I think first erections must improve.If they are recovered and full then with experience and patience PE can be cured easily.And yes brain needs rewiring ,that too is correct.Some needs less time,some more.

    Fingers crossed and I'm eagerly waiting and have patience too.I know it's a long way ahead.

    Thanks @Cyberpunk3000 for your time and motivation.Lots of success and peace.
     
    Last edited: Nov 20, 2021
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  7. Cyberpunk3000

    Cyberpunk3000 Fapstronaut

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    I have experienced this as well. Whenever I used to get frequentl wet dreams in the initial months. Even the weak MW would not appear for the next couple of days. And the dick would feel numb or dead. But as wet dreams became infrequentl and I was also taking 5mg cialis that I was getting some medium MW which would go away the moment I wake up or stand.

    I beleive in your case. You should avoid sexual activity for few more months. But I understand you are in a relationship and it makes it complex. Though after a certain point wet dreams don't affect you as much as they did in the initial months.
    We are exactly the same in this as well. Even before nofap. This was the case for me when I was in my long-term relationship. Always required head to get me going by the time am in...I would but within few mins.
    I believe I would be the same, if I tried with a partner now. It would take many attempts to override this faulty coding.
    I would highly recommend you to take sildenafnil for the initial few months. It would definitely boost your confidence and help during sex and rewiring.at least give it a try once.
    Thank you so much for the uplifting words.
    I totally agree with you. Even I have the same theory. Its the inability to achieve a stronger erection and hold it for a longtime that the brain has adapted to ejac quickly. Hopefully we first recover from pied and our libido.
    I wish you the same. Let's keep on trucking brother. Godspeed.
     
    Last edited: Nov 21, 2021
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  8. wfcasdvwervdsv

    wfcasdvwervdsv Fapstronaut

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    Hi @Cyberpunk3000 . Would you say you have a normal range of emotions now? One of the hardest things for me has been the anhedonia which makes me feel inhuman as I don't really experience deep feelings which move me anymore.
     
    Last edited: Nov 21, 2021
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  9. Selfdiscovery

    Selfdiscovery Fapstronaut

    If I'm true then I'll say it's almost nil sex since past 1 year.Its very difficult bro.I know through what I'm going.I don't feel at all any urge to have sex coz of fatigue and post symptoms of emission.Never even imagined that I'll go through all this.
    Infact I used to have better sex after 1-2 years of my marriage.ill say not best bt I was able to last for 3-5 minutes.But not aware of all this ,I continued consuming P here and there and till this year March ,I consumed it like anything.And due to my inability to have sex,I realised that something is really wrong with my head.And then started this journey.Earlier it didn't sink into my head that it's the problem.

    This I thought earlier many times but considering my diet and other things I decided to go without any medication.I have good diet.And sometimes I take Ayurvedic medicines that too not regular.By this time I have realised that problem is not in my member down there,it is in my head.Its just hormonal/chemical imbalance and all I can feel.When I feel aroused ,I can feel the inrush of chemicals and now I hate this feeling.Its like a curse.

    But I'm patience and optimistic and motivated to move on and continue this life changing journey.
     
  10. Cyberpunk3000

    Cyberpunk3000 Fapstronaut

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    I can relate to that. I have been there. But it has changed in the 4-5 months ever since I stopped having wet dreams. Major mental differences occured during that phase. My sleep got better which is the most crucial and key part of the process. I believe that led to my anxiety, depression to dissipate. My mood got better compared to the the intial stage where I was neurotic and had at least 3 mental breakdowns.
    There used to be many environmental trigger that used to make me irritated to the extreme. But now, even if those things happen, I don't flip.
    I would say the rage has gone down 90%.
    The key here is sleep.
    I am starting to feel happy about the things that I used to love. I am a movie buff, but ever since I started abstinence I jus didn't feel content watching most movies, I became restless watching them. I was someone who used to frown on ppl if they used phones while watching. But I ended up doing that, it was like my anxiety triggered adhd or something. But now am feeling that I am going back to my old self, enjoying watching stuff without anxiety or restlessness.
    I am also finding more happiness from learning music and languages. And my concentration has only become good over the last few months.
    But if I happen to have a shitty sleep pattern it does affect me with mood and concentration.
    So I believe the key to recovery is following good sleep hygiene once the insomnia is cured.(I had the worst insomnia or delyaed onset of sleep during the first 14 months)
     
    Last edited: Nov 21, 2021
  11. wfcasdvwervdsv

    wfcasdvwervdsv Fapstronaut

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    Thank you for your reply. Sleep has never actually been a problem for me, I’ve had 8 hours + almost every night for the reboot. However I do have wet dreams once or twice a month which I fear may be delaying my recovery. How did you stop having them?

    How about your feelings towards others (your ability to connect)? This is also something I’m missing
     
  12. Cyberpunk3000

    Cyberpunk3000 Fapstronaut

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    Thats great to hear. Use that to your advantage.
    You might be well on your way to the end of your recovery.
    Well, I noticed that if I indulged too much thinking about women or sex or swiping on dating apps in the later part of the day(evenings or nights). It led to wet dreams. Or if I had a combination of bad sleep along with such thoughts. So I basically cut out the dating app and also not having sexual thoughts or thoughts about women in general, though not completely but I minimised to a great extent. I would spend as much as time possible learning or thinking about music or languages. Read about stoic philosophy. Watch movies or read books. Basically changing my thought pattern.
    This, I am slowly starting to feel a bit human like. In the past I was extremely apathetic.
    But I am slowly connecting and feeling more in touch with feelings of others and things around me. Its a work in progress.
     
  13. Cyberpunk3000

    Cyberpunk3000 Fapstronaut

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    I was exactly just like you, man. Ever since PIED,PE kicked in at 21 and libido dead by 23. I would call my sex life below average sex. I would also last around 3-5. BJ's I was able to last way longer even with PIED at the early age 21-25 because of the constant stimulation.
    But as I kept pmo'ing not knowing what was happening with me(jus like you). By 28-29 I lost most of the sensitivity and could not even get fully erect from getting head. So PIV was getting affected, couldn't stay hard after PIV or even during bjs. Even erections to porn was non existent.
    That fatigue goes away after few months. It might be jus around the corner for you. So stay strong. I used to be like that. Exhausted waking up in the last 19 months, working out or doing anything at all. If I had a wet dream it gets even worse. But now its all gone in the last 4-5 months.
    Sad part is, I have no sexual urge or arousal or erections. Even if I touch my dick during shower. There is jus no feeling or sensation of any sort. I jus feel asexual.

    And about pills, many would think that, its not physical so pills aren't going to work. I got tested by doc and even did blood test. Everything came normal.
    But trust me. When I used pills. They do work. Before I ended my relationship at 29. I was off masturbation but not porn. During that time I used pill twice around end of 2019.The pills worked like magic. Like nitro boosters. It might help to reinstate the arousal template to a real woman. And boost your confidence that you can get solid erections.
    And trust me I have read such success stories.
    Jus my opinion.
     
    Last edited: Nov 22, 2021
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  14. Selfdiscovery

    Selfdiscovery Fapstronaut

    Don't do it.dont test youself.In past have done too to check if I'm allright.but it may go in negative direction.I read some where,you decided to indulge after this year end .So trust that real human thing and don't repeate the mistake again.

    Our case seems quite similar.I like to see you fully recover and rewired to a normal one.

    Never ever going back.Hope we can cross the line.
     
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  15. Cyberpunk3000

    Cyberpunk3000 Fapstronaut

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    Thanks for the warning..but my intention was not to go into the rabbit hole. It was like a sec or two when I was showering and I was like meh this shit is broken for good. Like, if you get a cut on your skin and after it heals, you touch and see if you have any sensation. something like that. I don't know how to explain. I jus got out of the shower right away.

    I have no intention to masturbate and orgasm ever again. Even without porn. Jus sex or do any stuff only with a partner.

    And I wish you the same man! Much love!
     
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  16. mentorr

    mentorr Fapstronaut

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    Hi guys,

    A quick update from me. 2 weeks ago I decided to spend the night with a girl I work with. To cut a long story short, while I didn’t O, there was a substantial amount of seminal leakage due to being aroused. A few days later I slipped into a flatline and last night I believe I stepped out of it.

    That night was the first time I experienced a good strong erection in a long time. While it wasn’t 100% it was a lot stronger than I’ve had in some time, maybe 60%. For me it confirmed that after 28 months of recovery I AM healing.

    9 months ago, I was in the same situation and found that after “sex”, flatline recovery took a good 2-3 months. Whereas after 12 days, my libido has returned with some sexual function. Just to point out, I am nowhere near where I used to be emotionally, mentally and in some ways physically. I still feel somewhat numb, mentally I’m not as sharp as I used to be, my skin and hair is dry and somewhat grey without any ‘light behind my eyes’ but I think for someone like me that has been recovering for so long, it helps to see a glimmer of progress.

    Sharing for anyone it might help.
     
  17. Dave G 123

    Dave G 123 Fapstronaut

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    Thanks for sharing. It gives me hope!
     
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  18. FpsMato

    FpsMato Fapstronaut

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    So your mental symptomps dissapeared?So you finally feel you joy from life again?Cause Iam at day 240 and anhedonia is worst mental symptom for me.Like i dont remember where i felt great about something.
     
  19. mentorr

    mentorr Fapstronaut

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    Just on the point of anhedonia, I think anhedonia is actually at the base of PAWS. While we mostly discuss it in relation to PMO withdrawal, there are a lot of people out there who suffer from anhedonia for different reasons. For example, this person had anhedonia after having surgery from cancer and found that the 6 years that followed, caused him to fall deep into anhedonia. He said he tried everything to get rid of it but that taking l-tyrosine actually cured his anhedonia for good. Worth a watch.



    I think this video is also one of the best explanations of anhedonia in terms of how it relates to addiction and dopamine.

     
    Last edited: Dec 4, 2021
  20. Monkeyboyab2c

    Monkeyboyab2c Fapstronaut

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    Hey Fellas I just wanted to give you an update on my progress. I’m somewhere around 680 days, so close to my 2 year mark. I have to say that over the past month I have been experiencing longer and longer stretches of normal mood rarely any brain fog and minimal dizziness from time to time. I still have my occasional moments especially 4 days after having sex. I see a return of all my classic symptoms but the time of their duration is shortening. I am not saying I am recovered but I am saying that there definitely is hope. I can also see why the forum gets abandoned by people who have recovered. I don’t agree with it but I can see why most people would want to move on and not dwell on the horror that is paws. At least I think a big part of being out of paws is not having to think about paws anymore. In my personal journey I didn’t do hardmode. I think if I had this would have been a lot quicker for me but the connection I have created with my wife was worth the cost. Please stick to this. If I am experiencing a glimpse of what life can be like on the other side of this thing it’s really damn good. I am not saying I won’t hit another big wave. That is definitely a possibility. What I am saying is that I am getting there. Sorry for the long post and God bless.
     

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