Panic. Please help me understand

The fishing is a huge part of the addiction. My husband recognized that for himself about a year ago, he was on twitter for work when he started going to different news sights, he was getting a buzz just from that! So, he gave the work twitter account yo an intern and deleted it from his phone/laptop. Have you talked to your boyfriend about it??

 

You must believe in him. He will eventually find out that it's wrong. You slowly have to tell this to him. Keyword is Slowly. Too persistent and he might get fed up and maybe even leave (I'm doubting this would actually happen but play it safe). I believe in you. Good luck.

 

If she wanted to play it safe she would leave him. There is nothing safe about being in a relationship with a porn/sex addict. Her mental, emotional, physical and spiritual health are all at risk by remaining with him. Take it slowly? No chance in hell, the time to end an addiction is now. If he can’t get into recovery or can’t take his actions seriously for what they are, she needs to decide if she wants to continue in the relationship.

 

Yeah, I believed in my husband for 15 years. Then detached completely for 17 years. He tried to quit that entire time. It wasn’t until he got into very specific counseling with a csat and started attending group meetings that he was successful.

 

@blue is everywhere Good luck.

 

This first part isn't but the second part is! As a PA, I can tell you that this is a very complex issue. Stopping the porn doesn't cure it, and often doesn't last. The addict needs help and while there is much that you and your love can do to help, he still needs either professional help (the CSAT) or help from other addicts who are in recovery. If he won't take action and go to a therapist or a 12 step group, or do something to significantly alter the course of his life (possibly religion or exercise) the outlook is pretty bleak. If he's just trying to be the same person but minus the porn, it's not going to work. He needs to change.

 

Honestly, as an so, no, none of it’s reassuring. Most pa’s will never get clean and stay clean. It’s brutal to be in a relationship with an addict and even more devastating to be in one who’s addiction is other women. Because really, faithfulness in a relationship should be the lowest standard. To not put your “ loved one” at risk and to not destroy their heart. I have never had to fight the urge to get sexual satisfaction from anyone outside my marriage. I recognize that my husband has a problem and that he’s still a good man, but that doesn’t change the fact that he has spent more time and energy on porn and hiding his porn than he has ever spent on me.

 

What is fishing

 

It’s just searching for porn or porn substitutes, or even as in my husbands case he was on twitter to post for work - legitimate reasons, once he’d posted though, he then started clicking on news articles . Since he had used twitter a lot in the past for porn, he realized that just searching the news sites were starting to “ feed the need” lol. He was literally starting to get the buzz.

 

It will usually start off innocent enough, but that addict brain will lie saying you’re just looking at the news, oh, look click this ones about the beach reopening ( addict brain is hoping for accidental bikini pics while lying to self that it just wants to read about the beach reopening), click girls in bikinis, shocker! Look that was just an accident but I handled it so well, I’m doing good, I’ll just click this link about etc......

 

Thanks for the explanation! So "accidently" purposely finding porn. Then they go down the rabbit hole....
My bf did this with reddit.. several times a day.

 

I had no idea there was porn on reddit

 

I had no idea there was porn on reddit

 

Mine claimed clean, then YOUtube was full of breast and click bait in history