Peace of Mind

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by payooli, Jan 19, 2019.

  1. payooli

    payooli Fapstronaut

    Just wanted to reflect upon how nice it feels knowing that if I died today unexpectedly, when my family is going through my hard drives to look for any important information they are not going to find gigabytes of fetish porn material. So nice...
     
  2. Gotham Outlaw

    Gotham Outlaw Fapstronaut

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    It's such a great feeling. So many people have no idea.
     
    Coffee Candy likes this.
  3. I'mJustAChoice

    I'mJustAChoice Fapstronaut

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    I currently live with my mother, I'm 25 and I'm studying, but I'm moving to Japan and that's gonna be my no comming-back for sure. The thing is that before NoFap I would masturbate and use anything at hand to clean the mess, be it paper, socks, boxers or even fucking t-shirts that I would use various days on a row till they were fucking cardboard (I'm not disgusted at my own fluids, but I know it's disgusting)... So I always was worried about hiding those next morning (no time for the washer machine), and I was never at peace knowing that she could find that, and if I left to College and I realized that I had not hiden the boxers I used the night before I would simply skip classes and jump back on the bus to go home and clean it.
    Whenever I went to the toilet instead (for paper), I would always open the door and check if there was someone there, and then I rushed to the toiled with semen on my hands (pathetic).
    When the urges came I would masturbate no matter who was home, and I have no lock on the door, so I would do it under the blankets, very stressful situation, and sometimes my mother would come in and I just pretended to be watching something.
    I would also never let anyone on my phone, just in case I had any porn opened (it was tranny porn, so double shame).
    Now (day 26) I live at peace, I don't mind anyone going in my room or using my phone, I have nothing to hide, not even when answering to what I did for the last couple of hours, because previously I would have to lie to avoid saying I had been masturbating.
     
  4. payooli

    payooli Fapstronaut

    Yes, definitely! The cognitive load of shame and lying...
     
    I'mJustAChoice and Coffee Candy like this.

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