Please do not blame me

Hello.
I am 29 year male, a doctor living in an Islamic country where sex outside marriage is not allowed.
I got married to a beautiful girl 10 months ago. I never had sex before my wife. She loves me a lot and I do love her. She is pregnant in a baby girl.
I have always been a clever student since long time, may be at the age of 14, I have discovered masturbation. I don't know how I did. My parents have usually been outside him for work for long hours so my habit increased. I masturbated in the beginning to pictures of slow internet those days then progressed to video clips of Musical videos where a bra or boobs are shown, then I have progressed to satellite TV channels where live sexy shows. I got to medical school and went to another city to live to my medical school. I have lived alone for 7 years where I was truly lonely, my habit progressed to paid phone calls, mutual video masturbation chats. I kept searching to girls who wants to masturbated for long long hours. I could even be awake for whole night for the grave. I never had our of marriage sex. I have graduated then traveled to a European country for some training. I was away from family and rules of my country and religion. I did masturbate a lot on porn. I have called many prostitutes on phone just to hear their voice. Luckily, I did not have real sex.
I returned to my country. I worked for a couple of yours in a hospital with porn and masturbation and paid sexual phone calls. I was eagered to get married to alleviate my sexual needs. I have married to a lovely beautiful girl that loves me and she does every thing to satisfy my sexually, but I still don't have the sexual pleasure as in porn or paid phone calls. I am a successful doctor but this habit is killing my truly happiness, always afraid to be caught.
For notice, due to stressful life, I always felt that masturbation is an escape way for my problems.
Please don't blame me.