Hi, guys! I will try to be concise and brief. (pardon for any misspelling and grammar mistakes, english is my second language) I ve been hanging around nofap community for 5 years now. I discovered NoFap through YBOP.com. Still remember the date i started reading everything about harmful effects of porn, etc. The 8th of July 2014. I was so excited, i went on a streak of 81 days: i wasnt watching porn, wasnt masturbating, i wasnt even looking at girls everything was great, I thought i found my new source of superpowers, but then, on 81st day, i relapsed, binged for couple of hours. I tried to get up, dust off and start again, but after 15 days i binged again. And here comes a strange thing... I vividly remember walking out my appartment building, and there was a girl passing me by. I couldnt help myself but checking her. So i ogled. It was almost like some internal force squezzed my brain, throw a fishhook on my eyes and pulled me to look in her direction. Despite my logic's protests, i rendered myself being helpless. Nevertheless, i went with my day. In 3 weeks i relapsed and binged again. That pattern continued for 4.5 years with streaks from 10 to 23 days ending with binges for 2-3 hours. Another strange thing happened to me in summer of 2015, when i realised that i couldnt fall asleep without masturbating if i ogled even 1 girl that day. Crazy? Weird? I know but i've been living like that for almost 4 years now. During summer i am even afraid to look up from sidewalk, because i am afraid of noticing some girls, my uncontrolled ogling, etc. And dont even ask me about swimming pools, beaches, malls, etc. - i scared of those places as hell I graduated from NoFap Academy, went to psychiatrist, joined Sexaholics Anonymous, dvelved on topic of lust and other stuff. But the problem never went away. Moreover, here comes more fun: my uncontrolled behaviour made me downgrade my phone to the one without internet, i unsubscribed from cabel tv, and blocked internet access at home. All of this because of my fear of relapse. Or at least i thought so... Recently, i discovered this article https://www.yourbrainonporn.com/reb...ong-abstinence-with-binges-an-addiction-risk/ It seems like it fits my situation. Maybe any other fapstronauts suffer from this nasty effect I just wanted to ask, guys, could it be THE reason or i am totally cocoo? what do you think in general? Any advice or feedback would be highly appreciated!!!