PMO has hindered my life!

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by king_arthur, Mar 8, 2017.

  1. king_arthur

    king_arthur New Fapstronaut

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    Hello all, my name is Arthur and I´m 25 yrs old male from Brazil, the reason that made me create this account is to "accept" my porn addiction and by doing so taking the first step towards reaching my life goals.

    The following is a timeline of problems which were caused by PMO

    It all started when I was a child , two major aggravators (being sexually abused and growing up without a father) made me seek an escape, which started out as fantasizing about sex (age 6+) with some softcore porn, this made me have a very early interest in girls, no problem so far, wrong! I was too young and not ready to be rejected by a girl which eventually happened, causing me to have anxiety around girls and having a deep fear of being rejected.

    11 years old, puberty hit and so PMO, I had just moved to another country, times were hard trying to fit in at school, got bullied a lot, anxiety and fear got worse because of it making me turn to porn as an escape more often.

    @14 yrs old, my porn problem got noticed since I had no internet at home at the time and not being able to lie to family members they saw my browsing history. Got caught!

    16 - at this age my porn addiction started to get worse, escalating to more crazy stuff and spending almost all night watching porn/mindless web browsing. This made me seriously anxious about sex performance, always putting myself down, having no confidence at all especially around girls. It turned into a spiral.

    early 20´s - due to escalated porn which combined with flashbacks that kept coming back from the sexual abuse I began to question my sexuality, having immense distress because of it I almost went crazy! from this point on I knew I had to stop.

    23- from this age on I was committed to quitting PMO but no major success.

    some random things that I feel like PMO has caused:
    -makes me have unreal expectations towards a potential partner (physically)
    -made me think I was not good enough for a certain partner, anxious, lost many great beautiful potential partners due to it
    -lately due to having relapsed too many times, it made me lose hope and therefore caused some depression
    -messed up sleep patterns
    -is causing problems at work due to depression/lack of motivation
    -low libido
    -pied



    this was a series of random things which came to my mind while writing this i´m sure there is more stuff to add but i´ll leave that to a later time, feel free to ask questions/msg.
     
    D . J . likes this.
  2. D . J .

    D . J . Fapstronaut

    How are you progressing today?

    What are your current strategies for combating the enemy called PMO?
     
  3. king_arthur

    king_arthur New Fapstronaut

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    Hey D.J. thanks for asking, i´m doing well today

    I´m trying a different approach this time and it seems to be working good for me, instead of going cold turkey I am trying to "reprogram" or should I say get used to real life, here are some practical things I am doing:

    -Only fantasizing about things I have done with a girlfriend of mine (no fetish. just normal stuff)
    -Trying to beat the so called deathgrip syndrome (loss of sensitivity which causes erection loss and difficulty reaching orgasm)
    -Use my sexual energy towards work/self improvement
    -Changing my mindset; If I relapse, instead of focusing on the guilt and shame and the bad feelings, I use it as a lesson, what could be done next time to avoid this from happening?
    Whenever I see porn I reaffirm this in my head: this is BS, girls don´t even like that, it has no intimacy
    -Exercising, nofap causes added stress, try to work it off

    I´ll add more as I remember/add to the list.
     
  4. D . J .

    D . J . Fapstronaut

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