Porn addiction has escalated me to extreme content that crosses my boundaries

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PornHasRuinedMe2255

Fapstronaut
I’ve been addicted to porn since a very young age. Even as far back in middle school I was already using porn compulsively. I didn’t have many friends and I always stayed in my house which led to doing nothing but watching pornography. Since then I can no longer get off to the thingsthat once got me off. I used to get rock hard just looking at an attractivewoman, but no more. I don’t get morning erections anymore. Myescalation first began by getting intothat step sister shit, then it moved on to BDSM, then anal, then it started to go too far. In the past two years I escalated to Trans porn. This was verydistressing to me because I am a heterosexual man, so the fact that I needed this level of extremity proved how far into addiction I am. If thatwasn’t bad enough I’ve since escalated to full on gay porn. Itstarted with femboy shit, then just kept escalating. The worst part is I can even feel myself getting numb to this. Has anyone else gone throughthis? If so how did you heal, or is iteven possible to get my true sexualityback?
 
Dude, nearly everyone here has been through exactly what you're describing. These forums are filled with people who experienced the same thing you are.

It's just chasing the dragon. You probably aren't interested in boys or men. You are interested in dopamine and oxytocin. And your brain has been so overstimulated for so long that it takes some real extreme stuff to even register. Lots of people also add drug use because eventually even hard core fetish porn won't do the job and they're looking for even another way to up the ante.

The good news is you can get right. Just stop looking at porn. It's not easy. But you can do it. And you're not alone. As I said, there are a lot of people here dealing with the same issue.

Once you cut the porn out, you'll eventually start to feel normal again. You'll start being attracted to normal things again. You'll even out. But it won't start until after you cut out the porn. As long as you keep chasing the dragon, you'll keep going further down that rabbit hole.

Good luck. Keep reading the forums. Keep asking for help. You can do this. Believe in yourself.

It'll be ok.
 
Depravity has nothing to do with your sexuality and everything to do with the high you get from it. We've all been there in one way or another. Stop the porn watching all together, as it will always lead you down the path of depravity.

Just because you watch gay P, doesn't mean you are gay, it just means you enjoy the high you get from the fantasy. I'd venture to say if those men were right in front of you, it wouldn't have the same effect. There was someone who posted about how they were watching so much trans P that they sough out trans escorts a few times and every time it felt so disgusting and wrong that they had serious performance issues.

You'll never catch the dragon, so stop chasing it today once and for all, you'll be glad you did.
 
Haberdasher said:
Dude, nearly everyone here has been through exactly what you're describing. These forums are filled with people who experienced the same thing you are.

It's just chasing the dragon. You probably aren't interested in boys or men. You are interested in dopamine and oxytocin. And your brain has been so overstimulated for so long that it takes some real extreme stuff to even register. Lots of people also add drug use because eventually even hard core fetish porn won't do the job and they're looking for even another way to up the ante.

The good news is you can get right. Just stop looking at porn. It's not easy. But you can do it. And you're not alone. As I said, there are a lot of people here dealing with the same issue.

Once you cut the porn out, you'll eventually start to feel normal again. You'll start being attracted to normal things again. You'll even out. But it won't start until after you cut out the porn. As long as you keep chasing the dragon, you'll keep going further down that rabbit hole.

Good luck. Keep reading the forums. Keep asking for help. You can do this. Believe in yourself.

It'll be ok.
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Good to know others have been through it and gotten over it. I posted about my addiction on Reddit before and mostly everyone there just said it didn’t exist and that escalation is just a term people use to deny that they’re into extreme shit. It’s nice to read stories from others and know that’s not the case
 
exi1e said:
Depravity has nothing to do with your sexuality and everything to do with the high you get from it. We've all been there in one way or another. Stop the porn watching all together, as it will always lead you down the path of depravity.

Just because you watch gay P, doesn't mean you are gay, it just means you enjoy the high you get from the fantasy. I'd venture to say if those men were right in front of you, it wouldn't have the same effect. There was someone who posted about how they were watching so much trans P that they sough out trans escorts a few times and every time it felt so disgusting and wrong that they had serious performance issues.

You'll never catch the dragon, so stop chasing it today once and for all, you'll be glad you did.
Click to expand...
Yeah, it’s definitely just chasing that higher dopamine hit. I remember when I was younger most of the stuff I watch now disgusted me. It’s like now it’s the only things I’m not numb to anymore. I just hope I’m able to quit porn, it’s such a hard thing to do
 
The thing is boredom around 50% of the time. I do some challenging studies and I used to reward myself at the end of it with "THAT". I've gotten so used to it that it's like giving up on it and trying anything else to spend my break time doesn't satisfy me enough.
 
Yeeted said:
The thing is boredom around 50% of the time. I do some challenging studies and I used to reward myself at the end of it with "THAT". I've gotten so used to it that it's like giving up on it and trying anything else to spend my break time doesn't satisfy me enough.
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Same, man. I’ve tried so many times to quit but it’s like I’m so stuck in it that it’s hard to give it up.
 
Well, fucked up on NNN lol. I made it 5 days in at least, which for me is a streak considering how hard it is for me to resist porn. Unfortunately though relapsed and binged and now I feel awful.
 
Take a deep breathe.

Firstly, do you suffer HOCD whatsoever?

Read my story, I went through something similar years ago. It’s on my profile. I’ve recovered since then.

Only answer: Quit PMO, take a break from anything sexual, even in real life or in your head, do not fantasize, if you get natural sexual thoughts, that’s fine but don’t force yourself to imagine sexual things. If you relapse, do not binge, and do not watch extreme material.

If after awhile you still feel these feelings, then maybe they might be true. If you are truly straight though, these things will begin to fade away and eventually die off and you’ll be left with your natural desires. That way you will know what was porn induced and what was natural. Anything porn induced will disappear with enough time away from porn (time depends on many variables).
 
The1AndOnly said:
Take a deep breathe.

Firstly, do you suffer HOCD whatsoever?

Read my story, I went through something similar years ago. It’s on my profile. I’ve recovered since then.

Only answer: Quit PMO, take a break from anything sexual, even in real life or in your head, do not fantasize, if you get natural sexual thoughts, that’s fine but don’t force yourself to imagine sexual things. If you relapse, do not binge, and do not watch extreme material.

If after awhile you still feel these feelings, then maybe they might be true. If you are truly straight though, these things will begin to fade away and eventually die off and you’ll be left with your natural desires. That way you will know what was porn induced and what was natural. Anything porn induced will disappear with enough time away from porn (time depends on many variables).
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Break from sexual: its only my hand and the shit video. Its like a second person in body who forces you to watch same se videos although i am definitively not gay
 
The1AndOnly said:
Take a deep breathe.

Firstly, do you suffer HOCD whatsoever?

Read my story, I went through something similar years ago. It’s on my profile. I’ve recovered since then.

Only answer: Quit PMO, take a break from anything sexual, even in real life or in your head, do not fantasize, if you get natural sexual thoughts, that’s fine but don’t force yourself to imagine sexual things. If you relapse, do not binge, and do not watch extreme material.

If after awhile you still feel these feelings, then maybe they might be true. If you are truly straight though, these things will begin to fade away and eventually die off and you’ll be left with your natural desires. That way you will know what was porn induced and what was natural. Anything porn induced will disappear with enough time away from porn (time depends on many variables).
Click to expand...
I definitely do, it’s reassuring to hear that you’ve recovered and that there’s hope for me. The hardest thing is resisting the urge to give in.
 
BEATINGHOCD said:
Hey bro just read your story. I’m going through something very similar.

I’ve been going on some decent streaks and been feeling much better, though I haven’t really went on a long streak, which I’m working really hard on achieving.

Do you suffer HOCD at all?
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I do suffer from HOCD, yes. Also congratulations on t he streaks you have achieved! Short or not that’s a lot better than I’m doing lol
 
Yeah, porn made us see things that we didn't like, things we didn't have thought of before, and we start to desire to do this in some way, and it seems that this desire comes from deep down in our own and it's not, it happens just because we are seeing this many hours a day every day, porn deceive us.

And I realized that I didn't look at any girl in the face or her hair, the only thing I have seen was boobs and asses walking, and imagine them in sex scenes that I watched and having sex with them in that place. I'm trying to avoid this, during this challenge to change this bad habit, and I'm starting to realize some other details in them like the hair, earring, the amount of makeup, and expressions.
 
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