Porn Addiction or Medical Issue?

H

Help905

Fapstronaut
Hello,

I’ve been having withdrawal/flatline symptoms even while on PMO. I am 19 years old turning 20 next month. I started PMO around the time I was 12 and started edging around 16 which is when I started seeing problems. I’ve noticed symptoms such as depression, anxiety, social awkwardness, depersonalization/ de realization, dizziness, fatigue, hair loss, low libido, no morning wood, etc. All of these symptoms remain while I PMO. All this started in probably the past year. Before then I was a compulsive edger. I edged for about 2 hours once or twice a week over the period of about a year and a half. Ever since May 2018 I cut down edging significantly and can say I probably edged 80% less than before. Twice so far in 2019 i found something quite weird about my situation. At one point after a streak that lasted 1 week I was upset that I wasn’t feeling better so I PMOd about 7 times in one day until I was exhausted. Then the next day I edged for about 20 min. The third day I PMOd again (not till exhaustion just a few times) and it felt like I was completely normal again. My libido and morning wood came roaring back, no more dizziness or depression or any bad symptoms. This lasted about a week until I had gotten very strong urges and watched a sexual music video. I didn’t end up ejaculating or even masturbating. I just watched it until I felt so horny that I was gonna explode then all of a sudden my brain snapped. I was back to the dark side of myself which I could not tolerate with all those symptoms. I’ve been in this state for a month and a half now and want to break out of it. I keep thinking that due to the fact that at times I break out and feel good again it can’t be PMO related and it has to be medical. However I had my hormones checked such as testosterone and thyroid and they came back normal. I’m just lost. I’m now on a 7 day streak of no PMO but unfortunately had a wet dream last night which brought back my depression like symptoms. When I don’t PMO for about a week my depression decreases but I’m still not at the normal side of myself which I mentioned earlier. I’ve honestly lost all hope and have no idea what the fuck is wrong with me. Sorry for the long post and I’d appreciate any help.

Thanks
 
Yeah once you're in withdrawal there's no going back. Not going to sugarcoat it; you're probably in for the long run like some of us on here. It definitely sounds like paws (post acute withdrawal syndrome). This is a type of long term withdrawal cycle that can't be interrupted (no relapses) and which may last 1 to 2 years, longer if you relapse. It is a medical issue with actual nervous system imbalances, causing the symptoms you're describing. Edging is particularly bad it seems. The longer you do this the more stress hormones you release, the more your levels of e.g. serotonin (nature's anti-depressant) are affected, the more depressed you'll become, the more dependent you will be on your habit to make you feel good. Then when you stop or try to stop all together this sub-clinical depression surfaces, becomes clinical, and it ain't pretty. This addiction doesn't just cause feelings of sadness or fear, it causes actual, clinical depression. Well it can cause it if you overdo it. A decade of doing it, day in day out, is overdoing it. You're not alone in this.
Remember this always.. the more pleasure you seek, the more unhappy you become. Let it be your mantra from now on, you'll need it.
 
bken said:
Yeah once you're in withdrawal there's no going back. Not going to sugarcoat it; you're probably in for the long run like some of us on here. It definitely sounds like paws (post acute withdrawal syndrome). This is a type of long term withdrawal cycle that can't be interrupted (no relapses) and which may last 1 to 2 years, longer if you relapse. It is a medical issue with actual nervous system imbalances, causing the symptoms you're describing. Edging is particularly bad it seems. The longer you do this the more stress hormones you release, the more your levels of e.g. serotonin (nature's anti-depressant) are affected, the more depressed you'll become, the more dependent you will be on your habit to make you feel good. Then when you stop or try to stop all together this sub-clinical depression surfaces, becomes clinical, and it ain't pretty. This addiction doesn't just cause feelings of sadness or fear, it causes actual, clinical depression. Well it can cause it if you overdo it. A decade of doing it, day in day out, is overdoing it. You're not alone in this.
Remember this always.. the more pleasure you seek, the more unhappy you become. Let it be your mantra from now on, you'll need it.
Click to expand...

Thanks for your response, do wet dreams or dreams about edging count as relapses? They are both completely involuntary and idk how to stop them. I’m on day 7 now and I don’t know what to do with my life. I can’t live like this for 1-2 years.
 
Help905 said:
Thanks for your response, do wet dreams or dreams about edging count as relapses? They are both completely involuntary and idk how to stop them. I’m on day 7 now and I don’t know what to do with my life. I can’t live like this for 1-2 years.
Click to expand...

Wet dreams are not involuntary, they can be controlled, it just takes some time
 
Help905 said:
So if I had a wet dream last night, that’s a relapse?
Click to expand...

Not really because you didn't know they can be controlled and it's difficult to control them. If over time you make no effort to control them, then there is a problem. Not necessarily a relapse but not not a relapse either.

jager said:
Wet dreams are not a relapse
Click to expand...

If you take advantage of them to make nofap easier and make no effort to stop them, they should be considered a relapse in the long run.
 
Thanks to everyone as i am in a simalar boat. I am on day 49 without porn or any edgeing but anxiety and depersonalization is bad. My brain just doesnt know how to cope with anxiety. Is this just from years of porn use ? How long will the extreme symtoms last?
 
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