Porn filters

Discussion in 'Partner Support' started by Portocala, Oct 2, 2017.

  1. Portocala

    Portocala Fapstronaut

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    Hello everyone,
    do you know any good porn filters for Mac computer and android phone? I'd like something quite impossibile to circumnavigate, but since I'm a total inexpert I'd love to hear some of your advices.
    Thank you very much!
     
  2. elley

    elley Fapstronaut

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    I’m interested in this too. We haven’t needed it so far, but just curious just in case
     
  3. Queen_Of_Hearts_13

    Queen_Of_Hearts_13 Fapstronaut

    I am not sure about macs, but what we use is Blocksite by chrome for the computer. (We have my laptop and that's it, I use safari only and he uses chrome only) For android we use a combination of MobileFence, Package Disabler Pro (for the things mobilefence can't do), and SafeKids Browser.

    For MobileFence and how we use it, the internet is blocked so he has no access (hence SafeKids Broswer), and certain apps are blocked like Youtube, and you can see what apps have been used, clicked on, how long, etc. You can also set key words for texts, so if my husband were to text the word porn for example I would be able to read what that text said. Package Disabler Pro is for the apps Mobilefence can't control that are within the android like Bixby. SafeKids Browser basically has a parent mode where the aprent puts in the password, and the parent can add sites that are allowed. Once in kid mode the "kid" can only access the sites the parent added.

    It's worked for us, of course there is a degree of trust that has been earned (hence why I trust him with my laptop not to use safari). Hope this info helped some!
     
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  4. Johns80

    Johns80 Fapstronaut

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    We use Qustodio which has worked great for Mac, hit or miss for Android. When it works it's amazing...but it's stopped worked for no reason twice in one month in the phone. Customer service is a joke.
     
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  5. Portocala

    Portocala Fapstronaut

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    Thank you for your advice! How did you guys decided for the porn filters? Because my SO says that he feels humiliated with all the control and this just gets him deeper and deeper in his depression and feeling of unworthiness, which I understand, but at the same time I know he cannot quit porn because it is an addiction and the control and checking, in my thoughts, could help him stop and reassure me as well.
     
  6. Johns80

    Johns80 Fapstronaut

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    Although my SO probably feels humiliated he also knows he can't quit on his own so he's sucked up his pride and told me to put on the accountability apps. It was also one of the things I said was necessary in order for me to stay in the relationship and know he was serious about getting help.
     
  7. I use OpenDNS. It filters at the wifi router level so any device connected to the wifi is filtered. Plus it’s free for a basic program.
     
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  8. Kenzi

    Kenzi Fapstronaut

    One of our best filters isn't a filter, but a overall setting on Google.
    We changed Google to think he's a 60 year old woman so all his searches are set up for screening those, parameters.
    And ads too.
    You have to edit them.
     
  9. Torn

    Torn Fapstronaut

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    Ever Accountable is what we use. It works great overall on Android's and PC's. It doesn't work the same on iPhones, though, unless you're only using EA's browser instead of Safari.

    Humility is a big part of recovery. I hope he will respect your boundaries and your need for peace of mind.
     
  10. Queen_Of_Hearts_13

    Queen_Of_Hearts_13 Fapstronaut

    Well, my husband (at the time bf) was willing to do whatever it took to "win me back" since he realized he couldn't keep lying and betraying me without losing me. His biggest fear was losing me, hence why he lied, and honestly I think it was his fear of losing me that allowed him to get past any negative feelings about having filters, or checking in daily, or not playing video games, etc.

    He is an addict, so there needs to be some control, because addicts who are admitting they are addicts often have very little self-control and need the aid of others (whether a therapist, treatment center, accountability partner, friends, etc.). Remind him that part of healing and recovery is getting help. Filters and blockers are aids in recovery. They don't keep the addict from using necessarily but are a deterant and reminder of their goal. In my opinion, and many other's I've read, addicts cannot get better alone, they need support and help. Think of the filters and blockers as "helpers" in recovery.
     
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  11. Torn

    Torn Fapstronaut

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    AA, that was my experience, too. My bf installed accountability software in order to win me back when I first discovered his addiction. His fear of losing me was greater than his pride.
     
    Last edited: Oct 5, 2017
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  12. 49times

    49times Fapstronaut

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    nibba just stop using phone and computer
     
  13. I’m the one who put the filters on because I didn’t want the temptation. I disabled the browser on my phone too. I didn’t feel humiliated, I felt empowered and free.
     
  14. Just me

    Just me Fapstronaut

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    I'm really interested in filters as well. I have looked into many options and it seems that none are perfect. We aren't quite there yet-and what we currently have works. Super locked down and restricted mode iPhone and I check his history each Friday. He actually thanks me for helping keeping him accountable, not every week but enough because he knows I hate doing it. Eventually we will have to get home internet.

    Also, he was pretty insistent that we get rid of his phone, but we did that for a number of years before and that eventually made him resentful, so I didn't want to go back to that. I am much more of a long term planner. I am hoping to find a good home solution in the next two years or so. I wish more people with success stories (although my husband went over 5 years successfully) would post what works for them.
     
  15. SpouseofPA

    SpouseofPA Fapstronaut

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    which app does the texts?
     
  16. Queen_Of_Hearts_13

    Queen_Of_Hearts_13 Fapstronaut

    Mobilefence does. Plus there is always spyware that can do so much more and theres spyware that can be on a device without the device owner even knowing.... kinda scary.
     
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  17. TalkingScum

    TalkingScum Fapstronaut

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    I was completely ready to do this, but my spouse and I may or may not be torrenting pirates.

    Does it block torrent sites or torrent traffic?

    I agree. All blockers and teachers are circumventable. I don't want to list any to give ideas, but they're there. PAs NEED TO actively want to change for it to work. Otherwise once it is removed, there's no self control.

    I, my self, love it.
    For one, it's a deterrent.
    Second, it provides accountability for me positively as well as the negative. I'm thankful for that because my word is trash due to 10+years of lies.

    My personal experience, covenant eyes on PC was great. Pricey subscription, though. Currently using kid zone, just for the screenshot and picture feature.

    For my Android phone, using boomerang with spin browser. Spin is free, boomerang has a cheap annual fee. Both same company, separate apps.

    Spin browser has it's own filters and allows you to configure a few more. A bit slow though. Combined with setting a passcode on Google play and uninstalling other browsers, it promotes safer browsing.

    Boomerang is parental controls. All apps and features are blocked by default and you allow the ones you want during install. I had only some productivity tools, messaging, and spin allowed.
     
  18. You choose what it blocks. It just filters your DNS requests through their DNS servers and won’t return ip address requests for certain sites you have blocked. You can allow specific web addresses through even if they are in a filtered category. You set up the filters on their website. It doesn’t actually block the content, it just won’t let your browser find it.
     
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