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Broken_soul1

Fapstronaut
I'm 17, I lost my gf because of my excessive masturbation and porn use,I used to masturbate 3x or more each day. Porn was like a stress reliever to me until I became addicted. I used be energetic,fun,and charismatic Now... I'm just numb,boring,and depressed,and sometimes even mad or sad with myself, with a shriveled up private area that makes me feel even more ashamed . I wish to become a 10x better version of myself and get my libido back and Use that built up emotion as motivation to prove her wrong and get my MIND, BODY, AND SOUL back aswell. I'm here to ask all of you guys to help guide me to the light. So far it's been 4 days since i last relapse need some words of encouragement and tips that help you guys thank you :/
 

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You lost you girlfriend, maybe that means a pretty bad low for you now.

The good part about that: lows can be a turning point.

These are things that occurred to me during my first challenge.

  • There are two layers regarding giving up PMO. With drugs they talk about "physiological addiction" and "psychological addiction".
  • The layer no. 1, physiological addiction, is basically about fighting your primitive urges to masturbate. The layer no. 2, psychological addiction, it about your deep desire to return to PMO even if you know it's harmful to you
  • There are some hints around here that help through the first days of the challenge. Things that worked for me:
    • Cold showers
    • Workouts, sports (I like swimming)
    • Socialize (well, that sounds easier than it is, but as long I'm with friends, I'm not even thinking of PMO)
    • Removing triggers (e.g. tight pants, erotic images - doesn't matter how "soft-core", erotic computer games, ...)
  • My impression is, those measure are all easy compared to the much harder change in attitude: not wanting to PMO anymore with all your heart
This last point is the psychological addiction.

When I relapse after a short try of the challenge, it's because I didn't really want to give up on the sweet thing that PMO is for me. Over a couple of tries, I could reaffirm my goals and I reached a point where I feel I can really imagine a life without PMO. Not a challenge, not a "test", not a reboot ... but a life without porn.

Maybe you can relate with this analogy. In one of my earliest visits to the dentist, I was told to avoid candies. For a short moment, I was in shock. Then later I realized, it didn't mean that really can't have candies anymore ... The advise was without any real consequences. But it would have been the best for my teeth if I would have been able to give up candy. But I wasn't ready for anything like this. I just suppressed the idea that candy is actually harmful to me.

It's not enough to commit to the challenge here on the forums. Somehow I believe, people who successfully go through with it have a much larger source for motivation. They would even go PMO-free without any nofap community, because they realized that they want to change deep inside.

I had to go through a couple of unpleasant experiences to confirm my goals, including PIED. So maybe, if the challenge seems like an overwhelming task to you now, keep it in mind. Don't forget that an actual PMO-free life is possible. But take easy steps. Try masturbation w/o porn, or try to limit the time you spend each week on masturbation. Keep coming back and read other people's stories. Whenever you feel ready, go for a challenge.
 
You lost you girlfriend, maybe that means a pretty bad low for you now.

The good part about that: lows can be a turning point.

These are things that occurred to me during my first challenge.

  • There are two layers regarding giving up PMO. With drugs they talk about "physiological addiction" and "psychological addiction".
  • The layer no. 1, physiological addiction, is basically about fighting your primitive urges to masturbate. The layer no. 2, psychological addiction, it about your deep desire to return to PMO even if you know it's harmful to you
  • There are some hints around here that help through the first days of the challenge. Things that worked for me:
    • Cold showers
    • Workouts, sports (I like swimming)
    • Socialize (well, that sounds easier than it is, but as long I'm with friends, I'm not even thinking of PMO)
    • Removing triggers (e.g. tight pants, erotic images - doesn't matter how "soft-core", erotic computer games, ...)
  • My impression is, those measure are all easy compared to the much harder change in attitude: not wanting to PMO anymore with all your heart
This last point is the psychological addiction.

When I relapse after a short try of the challenge, it's because I didn't really want to give up on the sweet thing that PMO is for me. Over a couple of tries, I could reaffirm my goals and I reached a point where I feel I can really imagine a life without PMO. Not a challenge, not a "test", not a reboot ... but a life without porn.

Maybe you can relate with this analogy. In one of my earliest visits to the dentist, I was told to avoid candies. For a short moment, I was in shock. Then later I realized, it didn't mean that really can't have candies anymore ... The advise was without any real consequences. But it would have been the best for my teeth if I would have been able to give up candy. But I wasn't ready for anything like this. I just suppressed the idea that candy is actually harmful to me.

It's not enough to commit to the challenge here on the forums. Somehow I believe, people who successfully go through with it have a much larger source for motivation. They would even go PMO-free without any nofap community, because they realized that they want to change deep inside.

I had to go through a couple of unpleasant experiences to confirm my goals, including PIED. So maybe, if the challenge seems like an overwhelming task to you now, keep it in mind. Don't forget that an actual PMO-free life is possible. But take easy steps. Try masturbation w/o porn, or try to limit the time you spend each week on masturbation. Keep coming back and read other people's stories. Whenever you feel ready, go for a challenge.
Thank you @franco216 hearing this shows that I'm not alone in the fight I'm going to change and I believe that I can change. people like you are what helps keep me going I just wanna say thank you once again for the tips and words of encouragement .
 
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