Porn makes me feel really ugly (F)

Because it's funny that someone would look at porn or movies and feel bad about themselves over what some dressed to the nines actor looks like.
I find it hard to believe that someone who knows what the behind the scenes is about would take movies/porn seriously.
So many takes, so many hours to shoot that one 30 seconds scene, so many professional stylists that get paid ssssoooo much money for their work... Btw, do you know what casting is about? It is about selecting a bunch of people interested in a part in a film and picking the best one - in porn that probably is the best looking one as porn is 99% about visuals.
Do I have to mention how long it takes to select that ideal person to shoot the film with? And what happens if for whatever reason they don't show up?

And even with that the quality of porn is just so laughably bad that I find it fascinating that people would look at these ugly actors with 5kg of makeup and think that this is beauty
Same with men: dick size isn't everything. In fact, it is pretty unimportant.
I sometimes have seen a face of one or two of them - once I watched an interview with one, then I saw some other guy talking about himself doing some Q&A if I am not mistaken - and while these guys usually are pretty muscular and have abs, I just don't think they are beautiful, you know?
To me it is just apparent that to look the way they look they have to make inhumane sacrifices. Which still doesn't change the fact that their faces are kind of ugly.
And even if that wasn't the problem, beauty is only skin deep

PS: And abs is not a sign of strength but that you don't eat enough

 

Btw your comments don't help nor sympathise with the OPs problem, if you don't have anything nice to contribute, I suggest you just stop and focus on your rebooting.

 

Sorry for being a human myself and having my own opinion.
Actually not. I am not sorry

 

Okay then leave

 

Lol someone disagrees with you and you tell them to leave?
No wonders you are stuck where you are at.
Rather than listening to something that would help you, you would rather be patted on the back.

 

I'm going to ask you one more time. Why do you think it's helpful to laugh at or dismiss the fact that porn makes a lot of people feel insecure? Do you know what addiction is?

 

I think I already answered it.
Being insecure is something to simply get over.

 

I think this forum has a new public enemy lol

 

To the OP: yes , beauty is skin deep and sells but so does shock. Both sell equally well in porn, in fact the more shocking the better.

as for the side convo about being self absorbed as a porn addict ... of course. Porn exemplifies the self. It’s for self. It’s for us to ignore self and our problems. It’s for us to numb ourselves from our problems.

the fact that @Johnson1243 doesn’t feel empathy is a result from some self-focusing behavior. Maybe pornography or something similar. But yes when we focus on our own pleasure selfishly we succeed in removing empathy.

in general I find porn addicts have very little empathy in general and also lose self awareness.

I personally don’t find the “in yo face” methods are highly successful with people who have little to no egos to start with though. The women who use them certainly have pain as their motivation but it just does not do what they fantasize it will do when it is verbalized.

To the beaten down man... There’s nothing to defend. Porn sows seeds of self comparison and then you learn that can hate yourself. From self hate comes self harm. And down the spiral we flush.

sometimes contributing to forums is a hazardous exercise that should Require a face mask as we can reinfect each other with the problems that come along with porn addictions, self-absorption, lack of social skills, or the opposite (going full Romeo and getting loads of women and hurting them in the process).

I want to encourage Johnson though; it’s not easy to share why you are in a porn forum. When I first came here I did not identify as a porn addict.

oh sure I watched porn frequently but it never occurred to me I was an addict. I was shocked a few days here I couldn’t deny that I was being helped by being here.

why was I being helped if I didn’t have a problem? This logical question stayed lodged in my mind.

It’s now been over a couple years and I am porn free for the first time in 25 years.

 

Empathy =/= breaking my arm patting you on the back.

 

You assume I am here because I am addicted myself? No. I happened on this forum by chance and kind of find you all fascinating. That's why I am hanging around here.

 

This kind of aggression is off-putting. You know that it's not going to win you people in real life, do you?
All I really did is to answer the OP's question and then just expanded on why is that so.
If that's how you treat people in real life then you have the answer as to why "no one cares about my addiction". Because those who care are getting treated in the way I am being treated now.
You quite literally told me to leave. So like you don't want me to care.
But then in the same breath you say things like "no one understands or cares about me".
But of course they do. But it's not their fault that you have some insecurities, isn't it? Then why would you take it out on them? It's not fair, you know?
Just like me now. I cared and got told off for that.

 

That’s not how life works bro.

This is not a circus , and the men and women here are not freaks nor are we sharing for your amusement. This is not entertainment.

If you keep “hanging around” it means something.

you can say... I have a problem with “this” but I am not sure it’s an addiction yet. That’s totally okay. Denial is the first phase of recovery.

welcome. The water is warm. Come on in!

 

No comment.

 

The questions were why so you think you are being helpful and do you know what addiction is. That is not an answer to either of them.

Strange how reluctant you are to learn then isn't it? Strange how you just talk about yourself all the time. People that are fascinated tend to ask questions of people they are fascinated by.

 

in my early teen years i was wondering if all penises are supposed to be the sizes of the ones shown in porn, from a quick google search i saw that the average penis size is far below pornstar "average", and that my one is size is average to slightly above average so i have nothing to worry about. Seeing some girls say "i only want 7+ inches" or that "5 to 6 inches is baby dick" did make me uneasy for a bit but then eventually i stopped caring because i know that in a relationship your genitales is not the priority whatsoever and you love each others for who you are

another thing was stamina, because i saw pornstars go for hours with suposedly no problem meanwhile i had to stop every few minutes to prevent ejaculation. It caused me to edge and cause delayed ejaculation, i was masturbating straight for 30-40 minutes and couldn't ejaculate (2017). This is when i got worried and started to try to ejaculate as soon as possible. This caused a new issue of premature ejaculation causing ejaculation within 1-2 minutes or sometimes within few seconds (2019). Then recently in 2020 i feel like i have beaten premature ejaculation because i can last 10 to 20 minutes again which seems normal.

Also even from vieweing porn i thankfully never changed the way i loved a girl for. I have never wanted a relationship with a girl just for having a nice body. All I care is that she is kind personality and a cute face especially if she is funny. I dont care about acne, i dont care about stretch marks, i dont care about your genitals look like, i dont care if you have a big butt or breasts. I have my flaws and i know my Significant other will have them, there is no shame in that!

 

I also suffered a lot due to acne also thin hair and dandruft. Took me over a decade to figure out that it was due to what I ate (porc and eggs). Still have a lot of insecurities because of it, but has improved quite a bit.

In porn and any media you always have these hot looking guys, I was more jealous about their clean skin and specifically the attraction that they have and not so specific how they look. What attractive is is a but arbitrary. Up to a few hundred years ago a full woman with some extra pounds was considered more atractive then a skinny woman, now it's the opposite.
What attractive is different to everyone, also there is at least for me a difference in sexually attractiveness and what I really find attractive.
If I would see some sex bomb like in the porn movies I think yeah I wanna shag her, but if I meet a woman who is no where near that kind of image of a pornstar but kind,nice has some aura, a beautiful smile, pretty eyes an X factor. I then think, Wow, I would like to wake up next to her and have a breakfast together. So that is what I find an attractive woman. A woman that I want to shag just because she looks hot doesn't immidiately mean I find her really beautiful.

But I do understand that people will compare themselves to them, everyone has some insecurities comparing to these pornstars or just basically any model, which is really unfair these people sure look good, but also have professional make up, pictures are taken by profesionals etc.

Example, years ago I actually met Pamela Anderson when she was in her early thirties, I met her in her hotel room for some paperwork and she had no make up on, she really looked just like any normal woman and her skin didn't look that great. Later I met her with full make up and dressed up and she looked hot.

 

It’s designed to hurt people, not make people feel better about themselves. If it’s a encouraging thought, just know that the porn industry has a high rate of drug overdoses and suicides. These pornstar females have a team of professionals to assist them. A lot of these women are human trafficked into the industry. Just go watch “Hot Girls Wanted” and you see what I mean.