Posessed by a devil?

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by Share The Pain, Oct 8, 2021.

  1. allhopelost

    allhopelost Fapstronaut

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    What emotions do you feel? Are you sure you aren't just panicking or feeling anxious? How did you feel before and after watching? What changed? Being "possessed" and all that is just in movies. It's not real. Neither can you lose your soul. It's simply not possible from a scientific standpoint. I think you're going too far in your religious beliefs because you feel guilty so you feel like God is punishing you and you're possessed. None of that can be proven to exist. There's no proof. It requires belief or faith that's why it's called religion. You need to just calm down. You're not going to hell and you're not going to die just because you watched some videos on a porn site.
     
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  2. Share The Pain

    Share The Pain Fapstronaut

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    I know, I have to take this seriously. Thats why Im going to see psychiatrist, Im super worried of my health.

    Tbh I cant blame it all on porn, Its just seems to be the biggest cause of my mental health state and anxiety. About the feelings; I felt like Im leaving my body, like my spirit or whatever was outside of my body. I couldnt think straight, all kinds of strange and creepy thoughts and feels rushed in my mind. Got memory losses and I felt myself unreal, like someone else took my mind and body and soul, like theres many people in my head or whatever. I dont even know what Im talking about myself or what I felt, I cant explain but it was scariest shit ever and no it was not a panic attack it was something else. I hope doctors can help me. :(
     
  3. allhopelost

    allhopelost Fapstronaut

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    Doctors can help you get numb these feelings/experiences but they can't fix the root of the problem. So you were astral projecting. Okay. And you feel like you have many people inside of you. I don't think you're crazy. It's just this type of experience isn't compatible with western society and psychiatrists are quick to label this as psychotic/schizphrenia. In the East like in India this is pretty normal. Have you tried commanding whatever is inside of you to leave in the power and authority of Jesus Christ?
     
  4. Randombro

    Randombro Fapstronaut

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    In god's sake leave this forum until you are doing better. Don’t listen to the woodo shit. Trust me, you will do better and be yourself again but go to a therapist. Next to your worrying mental condition it seems that you have a lot to process. A therapist will help you with both
     
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  5. learning

    learning Fapstronaut

    @Share The Pain , what you are describing sounds like depersonalization/derealization disorder ( https://www.psychiatry.org/patients-families/dissociative-disorders/what-are-dissociative-disorders )

    I think it is probably a result of your nofap efforts. I saw a video where a guy described how abruptly quitting testosterone supplements triggered depersonalization for several weeks or months. Maybe abstaining from PMO caused similar hormonal changes and triggered the same depersonalization for you. As further evidence, I developed psychosis about 10 years ago about two weeks after quitting PMO.

    My advice would be to PMO and see if you feel more normal afterwards. If that works then you need to try to slowly wean yourself off the PMO rather than going cold turkey.
     
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  6. learning

    learning Fapstronaut

    @Share The Pain , also wanted to add that your idea about demons is not silly. At times I have experienced things that seemed like angels and demons and God and so on.

    Regardless of whether there are spiritual issues, it seems like you ought to drop your nofap efforts and be more cautious next time you attempt.
     
  7. Share The Pain

    Share The Pain Fapstronaut

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    Yes! Im sure I have dp/dr disorder, I got all the symptoms. Feels like my brain cant process all the negative thoughts which make me feel disconnected. But last nights anxiety attack or whatever was something else. Probaly my brain cant stand this anymore or something..? I hope the hospital will help me out and they can name it.
     
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  8. Where the body goes the mind follows. What the hear ears and the eyes see the mind believes. I wish I knew how to help you. I’ve had my fair share of mental health issues, most of them between the ages of 16 and 23. Those years left a mark on my life. Some people need meds. Some people get by on behavioral modification. Everyone needs good habits and a supportive community, porn addicted or otherwise.
     
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  9. Follower of God❤️

    Follower of God❤️ Fapstronaut

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    Thats my story Literally word by word buddy, just remember that you are not alone.
    I am currently studying, even though my speed of grasping is pretty damaged at times but, we must remember and trust this recovery process.

    I am finally able to study atleast.
    Just don't fall for brain tricks, you are it's master and not the brain.

    God bless <3
     
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  10. Marigny

    Marigny Fapstronaut

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    Hi Share the Pain, I hope you did go to an hospital, and that you get a cure for your problems
    I also hope that God will give you the strength to overcome your addiction as well he did for me and many others

    Just in addition of what has been already said, I would like to recommend you to try « deliverance prayers », as you mentioned being possessed
    It’s just a precaution, it’s free, harmless, and even if your not possessed, it is still prayers

    you can find some on internet
    Psalm 142 (or 143… the one that begin with « Lord hear me prayer ») is a good one for example
     
  11. OttarrTheVendelCrow

    OttarrTheVendelCrow Fapstronaut

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    It sounds like you are experiencing psychosis or disassociation/ego death. I speaking from experience. The good news is that a professional can help you return to normal and people usually can come back 100% from these things. That said, if you wait and do not talk to a professional about it whatever it is you are experiencing can become pathologized. Please seek professional help if you are still feeling this way.
     
  12. Share The Pain

    Share The Pain Fapstronaut

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    Yes. Im going to a doc tomorrow. What is one of the biggest symptom I hate is that Im struggling with walking, my legs feel shaky and feels like Im walking on a rope and one wrong slip and Im gonna fall. Cant go outside that much anymore. Feeling really helpless.
     
  13. ImASinnerWhoJesusSaved

    ImASinnerWhoJesusSaved Fapstronaut

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    Good to hear you're going to a doctor. We all hope you follow through and get some much needed help. And we look forward to helping you continue your journey of healing. Hang in there friend.
     
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  14. MindPrograms

    MindPrograms Fapstronaut

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    People, who are focused on only the gross level of existence, will tell you to snap out of religious poison, as seen in the thread.
    There is no need to condemn them because they're just trying to help with their own knowledge. However, one must be careful and not take their advice as the truth.

    This universe we live in has many layers, and at subtler levels, there's more than what is visible to the common eyes. Call them angels, devils, spirits, electromagnetic phenomena, whatever you like. If you're a man of science, go ahead check out some of Dr. David R. Hawkins's measurements done for places and items, or maybe just Dr Emoto's experiments on water.

    Anyways, where I am going with this is, there is a binding factor in this universe, keeping all things together, and through that vehicle, information is exchanged invisibly. This spread of information may cause ideas/thoughts/personalities/addictions grow, and just in the same way, things are sustained. That's one of the subtler reasons why it's very important to change one's environment to overcome addictions.

    As for the unseen entities, don't get too hung up on the personification of the unseen, (because it's best you focus your attention on what helps you), but know that you do have an invisible connection to everything that is part of your current being, and overcoming this magnetic connection requires perseverance, unwavering action towards the opposite side. There will be a point where it breaks, and you can call it "the reboot".

    Just one more tip for your journey; remember this teaching: when snowboarders train people, they keep suggesting "watch the path, watch the path" instead of "avoid the trees" because the experiments show that when trees are mentioned, people are more likely to direct their attention to the trees and hit them. In the exact same way, let go of the idea of being possessed, just accept the law of nature, and keep your focus on the identity you want to become.
     
  15. MindPrograms

    MindPrograms Fapstronaut

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    I'd like to elaborate further;

    The symptoms you are having are due to you overcoming the addiction with willpower. That's like a rocket creating an initial thrust with explosives, it shakes and endures so much until gravity loses its grip on it. And it may even fall or break if the power is not efficient or precisely configured. You see what I did here? : )))

    So, seeing a doctor is definitely the right decision. In addition, implementing the following will ease your journey;

    - Calm your mind, relax, become lighter in general.
    - Find your inclination, a vision/occupation that you really enjoy. (something totally unrelated to porn/sex)
    -- Practice this thing on a daily basis, and let it pull you towards it.
    - Consequently, eliminate the things that trigger your PMO habit. (these are usually: boredom, grief/sorrow, anxiety/fear, anger, self-sabotaging reasoning)
    -- The remedies to those triggers are usually the opposite of those, practiced steadily. (being occupied, hope, enjoying the small things (they will become big / more valuable/satisfying over time), awareness to distinguish what serves your body and what serves your mind/personality. etc).


    And most importantly, don't be too hard on yourself. Embrace change and develop your new personality in equanimity. Don't hate the situation you're in now. Simply accept, forgive, and let go of it in favor of a different experience.
     
  16. OttarrTheVendelCrow

    OttarrTheVendelCrow Fapstronaut

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    Glad to hear that youre going to a doctor. They will be able to get you the help you need
     
  17. SickSicko

    SickSicko Fapstronaut

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    I personally find a bit harsh what some people are saying here, just, it is a sign of some serious psychological issues, but I also think that, behind those issues, are very deep things to uncover in oneself.

    @Share The Pain, when you are losing the sense of who you are, to me, it just means you are in a period of inner transformation, the problem is you are attached to what you consider yourself, identifying with an specific, with certain traits, certain ideas etc... and therefore a different tendency within yourself even can feel like a different person, but as a human we are absolute potentiality in terms of manifestations of the psychological aspects of oneself, you should not attach yourself to anything, it should be more like seeing yourself as the observer that flows within transformations, and always keeping in mind, that no matter how conflicted your inner world may be, all those are just aspects of yourself, and that what will define who you are, is how you conduct yourself, how you take that inner world and put it into the flesh.

    Every voice within you is you, but none is you.

    I myself felt split, always in conflict with myself, like if there were two people within me, one needs to be careful what oneself identify with, dissociation is no joke.

    Nowdays I would say I have a miriad of voices within my head, and that all of them are me, and none of them is me, I am who I am, but thanks to the prior I can see things from many perspectives, get into people shoes easily... know that I'm not a or b, but a and b and c and d, and I choose how to behave, if like a, or b or etc... and that ultimately, is who I am, who I choose to be, even when internally I may have many many other aspects of myself that don't manifest on my behaviour on a daily basis.

    I know that if I inaccurately express how it is to live like this, any psychologist would probably say I have some pathology of some kind, guaranteed.
     
  18. ThePeakWae

    ThePeakWae Fapstronaut

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    No-no, you are still safe, assuming your brain rewires after 90 days of nofap you should be clean by then, but you gotta endure til the rewiring, or it could become permanent
     

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