Powerlessness

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by Loren, Apr 30, 2014.

  1. Loren

    Loren Guest

    Reported from http://www.nofap.org/forum/showthread.php?7646-Loren-s-new-journal&p=54766#post54766

    Powerlessness

    What's the deal with this powerlessness business? It is true, We do overcome, (gain victory) over our addictions. And yet I still admit my personal weaknesses. Nothing wrong with admitting personal weaknesses. I believe that they are gifts from Father. But there is no victory over the addiction until we admit powerlessness. I hope I can explain this, how it isn't semantics, but true powerlessness. Here goes.

    I am a sex drunk. I am an alcoholic and my alcohol is Lust. An alcoholic will never have power over alcohol. He can never drink it and not become drunk. He is powerless to that fact. Nothing he can do, no belief in God, no reading scriptures no saying prayers, no positive thoughts, nothing can make it so he can drink and not get drunk. In fact, no human can. Alcohol is powerful. It is full of honesty and integrity. Every time one drinks it, the alcohol has the exact same, consistent effect. Alcohol does not lie. It doesn't say drink me. It just sits in the bottle on the table, full of honor and dignity. Alcohol gives you a head ache the next morning and that’s when you stop. When I admit my powerlessness, I get the clarity to stop drinking (lusting) and the hangover goes away. That is far better than when I believed I had power over lust. I thought I could drink and not get drunk. That is the insanity. I am an alcoholic and my alcohol is Lust.

    That's the irony isn't it? We have no power over something until we admit we don't, then we do. Powerlessness is only step one. It is necessary and prerequisite to be able to accomplish step two and then step three. The book Alcoholics Anonymous explains our powerlessness quite well. Then step two is coming to believe a power greater than ourselves can bring us to sanity. Then step three is to surrender to that power, God. Taken together, these three steps come into harmony with those who contend that we indeed begin to have POWER over the addiction. But in all of the 75 years of Alcoholics Anonymous, nobody ever overcame alcoholism without first admitting defeat. I never made progress in my victory over sexaholism until I admitted defeat. The whole twelve step program can be summarized succinctly with:

    Without God, I can't. Without me, God won't.

    Love

    Loren
     
    stegiss likes this.
  2. William

    William Fapstronaut

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  3. TodayIWin

    TodayIWin Fapstronaut

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    Since I was 12 I have begged God to help and I failed to do my part to allow Him to do so...SO now I avoid asking for help because I just want one less important person to disappoint....perhaps my perception is wrong...I know he forgives and encourages me as i move through life BUT I feel frustrated with Him in the process and begin to blame Him for not helping me more....thats wrong so to avoid that whole line of thinking I try and do it on my own...I pretty sure its a bad idea...
     
  4. Alexander_D

    Alexander_D Fapstronaut

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    Great post. I never progressed with nofap until I really woke up to myself and admitted that I was powerless over PMO.

    I wasted so much time being torn between keeping it and giving it up; clinging to the porn dream of sexy young anonymous flesh bouncing around in ecstatic peals of constant pleasure, while suspecting it was all a lie.

    I had to completely scrap this grand vision of myself that I had painted through pride. It was all a vain lie that kept me useless and unable to love, but fed by porn.

    I think it's good to keep nofap broadly secular, but there really is something religious about PMO that we cant escape. Our whole civilization has traded the Cross as the symbol of longing, devout struggle and victory, for the orgasm. We think about orgasms today like people used to think about heaven and God.
    And man have the walls come tumbling down...
     
  5. This is very true! We always want to control the addiction by allowing ourselves to enjoy the nice things about it and believing that the worse side will not come back at us. Sorry, it doesn't work like that. You either receive the whole of addiction in all its fullness - or you admit you are not able to handle it and quit it altogether.
     
  6. mjtx

    mjtx Fapstronaut

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    I'm new to the board and just found this thread.

    I am a recovering alcoholic, and newly-recovering porn junkie. I am pretty sure that I will always be addicted to ANYTHING sort of meaningless "feel good" like masturbation or alcohol or drugs.
     
  7. bandanana

    bandanana Fapstronaut

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    Thanks for posting this @Loren. I was getting really cocky for the past few days, and now I'm here because I was unable to sleep cuz of my uneasy mind wanting to edge.

    Tonight, I'm powerless. I'm too mentally drained to fight my own urges. And I remember how every night that I did the Sign of the Cross, my mind is placed at better ease, and I find rest. More often than not, I fail to credit God for His help, and you remind me of what I owe Him, and that I need Him tonight.

    God bless your journey, and all of you as well. Love more, and good night.
     
  8. Loren

    Loren Guest

    Reading my old blogs. Wanted to share this one with you new folks.

    Cheers.
     
  9. wannabeeFree

    wannabeeFree Fapstronaut

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    I dont run with the powerless nonsense, how many times in life will your imaginary friend let you down, and give you a good excuse to show how powerless you are. Search the orange papers where the real succes/failure rates of 12 step programs are ruthlessly exposed
     

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