Thank you Mr. Eko. Forgive my ignorance on the matter. I did not do everything possible. I gave in willingly and I feel worse about that. I asked for forgiveness and I am hoping to reboot with a promise to smaller increments. Part of me wants to to give up PM for good but another part of me does not. I am constantly trying to reach for the former for the latter seeks my destruction. I have recognized that the small steps, that can be regarded as trivial, such as browsing without intent of accomplishing a task, are the things that lead me to relapsing. I am new to this so thank you for your help. I've always known God's presence and I've been very sure of this. but I have not put forth the effort in order to actually find him. I wish to change this and I hope that Christ can show me the way. I hope If I start to pray, in anyway, he will reveal himself to me but I am afraid I am doing it wrong. I once had an experience, a supernatural experience, that I could not explain and I am sure this was God manifesting himself in me. As a kid, I wish fishing off a pier at the beach. It was my first time fishing for some mackerel and I could not catch a damn thing. No one else seemed to be catching mackerel so I was loosing hope and it was nearing the end of our trip out to the pier. I sent out my last cast, reeled it in, and begin to get ready to go find my father. As I was getting ready to leave, a very large, profound, and loud voice spoke and told me to cast out there. I immediately knew where and I sent my lure flying. To my surprise I felt a large tug on my line and I began to reel in the unknown beast. It turned out I had hooked a king mackerel... I have yet to realize any significance in this but I know what I experience was profound. I hope to hear God in this way again.