Pregnant Wife's PMO triggered my reset.

This is my first post in this forum, although I have been lurking for a long time.

I learned very recently that my wife and I are going to be parents. She is less than 1 month pregnant but already showing a lot of symptoms and has gone through many pregnancy tests.

We are both very excited for this new opportunity in our lives and we are steadily making changes to ourselves to become the greatest versions of ourselves and thus the best parents we can be.

I have been addicted to PMO since I was younger than 10 and my wife started around 14 when I taught her how to fap and introduced her to sex and porn.


When we found out she was pregnant I was fist deep in my addiction.

Spoiler: triggers

Watching hours of porn, fapping with condoms on my penis and even giving myself oral and swallowing the semen.

My wife in the other hand only watches a few minutes of porn before her orgasm but may do it several times in a day. This was what I saw when I look at her web history last night, after we shared an intimate moment of non-penatrative sex/ masturbation. She hadn't touched me or offered me anysex because my penis wasn't getting hard when I watched her go to town on herself. When I woke up from an overly demanding boner that was poking her, she told me to leave the bed and go take care of myself, it was then that I looked at her phone and first went to the browser history to find that she had M'd once that day and once the day before to some videos. I did not click on these vids because I knew that watching porn for me would throw me right back into a powerful addictive trance. I then opened her pregnancy tracking app and wandered to the section of "Pregnancy Do's and Don'ts" then to the section about sex. The thing that triggered me to start fapping my dick was what it said about “Swallowing Semen" how it's unsafe to swallow from strange men who might have STDs. This made thousands of images of all the hours of gangbang cumshots and bukkake scenes I've brainlessly consumed come to the forefront of my mind and my dopamine levels were sky high as I jerked off. When it came time to bust my nuts I bent over and put the head of my dick in my own mouth and swallowed the sweet seed. I fantasized that it was my wife eating my cum the way she hasn't done in years.

I woke up this morning having strong urges to PMO but I will take this little reset as a small victory because I know that I can say no to P even if my wife can not.

 

Trying hard to change