imsoappalled
Fapstronaut
Meant to post this ages ago, but here we go!
How I quit porn and almost completed my 90 day NoFap but messed up a week before finishing.
Typical backstory: Got introduced to porn at the age of 12 by a classmate, been masturbating since then, typical stuff. Had girlfriends over the years, interestingly though, I'd not be interested in porn when I was dating them.
Fastforward to the age of 25 - been practising my religion more and more as I got older, so I always had this religious guilt regarding it. But to myself I thought: well at least I'm not having sexual relations pre-marriage anymore.
So over the years my taste in porn developed but in the past year or two it got, sad to say, pretty culture-specific. Then this website came, that posted all this culture-specific porn. Now, obviously, my religiously conscious self was aware that this is really bad, yet I was really into it and had viewed every single video on the website.
One day everything changed: the website posted a video which was blasphemous (by religious standards) and that day my heart dropped. Sure, I felt disgusted about this secret side of mine (that noone would even fathom of) prior, but this just enraged me. The week after, they posted a video which was even worse. At this point I was done and disgusted and made the intention to do a 90 day nofap.
Fastforward to week 11. I'm practically there bro, so close!! But I met this girl and whilst speaking on the phone we - eh, pleased ourselves over the phone. Pretty pissed at that. Happened again a few weeks later on the phone with another girl.
Right now: haven't viewed any actual porn since June, excluding sex scenes that come in TV shows. I don't fap without porn, also cut out women, because they are a distraction. Other than that life is going pretty well, can't complain.
However... I still think about that website and deep down I wanna go and have a look again. But I can't - not only can I not go back to watching porn, it is probably over the top blasphemous at this point. It is a struggle, every day. But I pray for steadfastness on this nofap journey. Gotta get rid of this porn habit forever.
How I quit porn and almost completed my 90 day NoFap but messed up a week before finishing.
Typical backstory: Got introduced to porn at the age of 12 by a classmate, been masturbating since then, typical stuff. Had girlfriends over the years, interestingly though, I'd not be interested in porn when I was dating them.
Fastforward to the age of 25 - been practising my religion more and more as I got older, so I always had this religious guilt regarding it. But to myself I thought: well at least I'm not having sexual relations pre-marriage anymore.
So over the years my taste in porn developed but in the past year or two it got, sad to say, pretty culture-specific. Then this website came, that posted all this culture-specific porn. Now, obviously, my religiously conscious self was aware that this is really bad, yet I was really into it and had viewed every single video on the website.
One day everything changed: the website posted a video which was blasphemous (by religious standards) and that day my heart dropped. Sure, I felt disgusted about this secret side of mine (that noone would even fathom of) prior, but this just enraged me. The week after, they posted a video which was even worse. At this point I was done and disgusted and made the intention to do a 90 day nofap.
Fastforward to week 11. I'm practically there bro, so close!! But I met this girl and whilst speaking on the phone we - eh, pleased ourselves over the phone. Pretty pissed at that. Happened again a few weeks later on the phone with another girl.
Right now: haven't viewed any actual porn since June, excluding sex scenes that come in TV shows. I don't fap without porn, also cut out women, because they are a distraction. Other than that life is going pretty well, can't complain.
However... I still think about that website and deep down I wanna go and have a look again. But I can't - not only can I not go back to watching porn, it is probably over the top blasphemous at this point. It is a struggle, every day. But I pray for steadfastness on this nofap journey. Gotta get rid of this porn habit forever.
