Quitting and feeling no more love?

Hmmmmmm. Since my journey I have noticed a larger disconnect from emotions but I can't say for sure if that was from NoFap or if its because hormones stopped hitting me like a truck and I've matured. What helped me is finding a drive, imagining the type of man I know I'm capable of becoming and acting on it. He might just need time for the symptoms to fade, especially if he was hard into porn before. However I don't think feeling emotionless is a reason to not want to make my lover the happiest darn tootin woman in the world.

Hope this helps

 

Hi @BrokenWing , as far as I remember, I was a lot more emotionally sensitive when watching. But not sensitive like one who hasn't been "desensitized" by experiences, sensitive like wounds that are being touched constantly. My wild guess is that the constant abuse of yout body, hormonal and nervous systems can lead to some unpredictable consequences like that. My other wild guess is that you two should be patient and obviously continue abstaining to see the results.

It should have been hard to listen to what he told you (I certainly would be upset about it), but It is good that he did and also that you took iniciative in helping. I am happy about hearing that.
I wish you both luck.

 

Maybe he should first open up to the experience of what he's doing, and let aside if it fits into the "norm". In the way I see it now, individual feelings (and specially in this case) should be first felt in its entirety, with an attitude towards understanding and managing them. If focused on "where does this feeling fit?" one can lost the point of the situation, based in a sole mental state (which is highly fickle) and lost also oportunities to manage them, which are the engine to changing the situation.

This is great. Thank you!

 

There are many rebooting with partners, especially. Probably as many with partners as without. My husband experienced withdrawals pretty good for the first 4 months. Then he started changing drastically. He never said he didn’t feel anything for me, but he went through a stretch where he really didn’t feel much at all then a stretch where his emotions were overwhelming. Anhedonia occurs to many addicts getting clean, no joy, no motivation, just nothing. It will pass.

 

There are people like me that after quitting they get more emotional. That's because we don't experience the flatline. People that get into the flatline loose all kind of emotions towards the world, don't make it personal.
This is part of the procces. Gave him time.. eventually he will get back to normal.

 

It's because how much damage in the brain a person have because of porn and how much experience with real world intimacy with real person. More porn damage and less real experience normally leads to flatline. I have more than 10 years of porn but also like 15 years interacting with woman romantically speaking.