Quitting listening to music

Discussion in 'Off-topic Discussion' started by Ypow, Dec 14, 2017.

  1. Ypow

    Ypow Fapstronaut

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    So i m on nofap lifestyle 5 months, i don t know exactly date of starting but i knew is since beginning of July. I posted about my progress and it s all fine. I don't think i m perfect but from an lazy guy who jerked off 2 times (usually 1) per day on every possible moment to disciplined man then i can rate my journey(i will not quit nofap) with 4 (from scale 0-5). Why not 5?? Why i m not best version of myself? There comes the problem..

    Daydreaming
    Since i was 10 yo i always had problems with socialization with people,mostly because of bullying in school,no interesting in my life. And when i had this moments when everyone ignores me i just put headphones and listen to music. Repeating same songs because i didnt felt one song in way i want to,going from one room.. And while listening i create my fantasy world,where me as important character is everything that i want to be,best dude in city,girls around me,hugs,love,fame.. Its maladaptive daydreaming.
    I will give an example what happened two years ago.
    So i was going to school and i listened to music(I forgot song name but that song is very important in this story,because it s about life and its about fights,love and that stuff).
    And i went to the class and there were my 'two friends' and i sat on my desk and in next 10 minutes that friend were just judging me,(note that i have listened to same song) and when there is no escape i decided to punch him. I left headphones and i punched him in the face but that wasn't enough he kicked me 5 times more and then he left class.
    You probably know what is a message of this little story. While i was thinking to punch him i already made in my mental world story how i brutally kicked him and how he is on floor blah,blah.. And thing is that while MD you don't make difference what is real world and what is fantasy.
    And from then i think i started to destroy my life(I left school because of that) with more and more laziness,so every day (12 sometimes less or more hour) i was in fantazy mode.. Until i decided to go to college ,and month after i found nofap and that thing has changed me.

    Entire august i was just doing on improving myself(also i wrote about this) and WITHOUT MUSIC i have completed all my goals. And in september,october i was listening music a little bit but that little bit is enough to start daydreaming again(one girl who i liked) and because of that my concentration were also fucked up..

    And i will start again this nomusic journey.I m already one day without music . So next update will be next week. And i will see if i can pass this addiction forever.
     
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  2. Ypow

    Ypow Fapstronaut

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    sorry for grammar mistakes i will fix them tommorrow. good night! :emoji_zzz:
     
  3. lantti

    lantti Fapstronaut

    What kind of music did you listen to?
     
  4. Ypow

    Ypow Fapstronaut

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    Trap,EDM, dnb, dubstep, almost everything where the rhythm is good.
    Droeloe - in time, Freedom - Teqq, Protiac - Haze etc
     
  5. Dake1963

    Dake1963 Fapstronaut

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    It seems to be a big thing to give up without much gain. Have you thought perhaps of listening to more complex music, like classical ?
     
  6. Just

    Just Fapstronaut

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    Do you always listen to music with headphones on, sounds self-isolating? I hope that you do not have to give up music, there is so much beauty, like the genre change @Dake1963
     
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  7. Rob_B_

    Rob_B_ Fapstronaut

    Yeah, I'm with @Dake1963 on this one. Thinking about my own mental state and balance, in a generic way rather than specifically in what comes to addictions (porn or otherwise), I can think of several genres that could be - especially in high doses, with volume up to 110%! - quite agitating, destructive even. On the other hand, something like Bach or maybe Chopin (not my favourite composers, by any means, but that's not the point I'm making) I would find very soothing and meditative, and probably conducive to positive mental state and harmony, which is probably what one needs at a time of brain rewiring and all that.

    On a personal note, where I am right now, I wouldn't want to give up anything good and wholesome and beautiful like music or literature or any of the other arts; if anything I feel like I need more of that to nourish my soul. But each to their own, of course...
     
  8. Ypow

    Ypow Fapstronaut

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    My concentration will be weak. Song will be always in my head. Maybe as Christian i can change genre of music, so just listening to Christian music. I haven't done this.
    Thanks for support.
     
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  9. I Am that I Am

    I Am that I Am Fapstronaut

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    Like this?

     
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  10. Ypow

    Ypow Fapstronaut

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    Praying to God, helps me a lot in these days. My mind is so clear.
     
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  11. Onehope

    Onehope Fapstronaut

    Expand your musical horizons, not all music is the same
     
  12. Ypow

    Ypow Fapstronaut

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    2nd UPDATE:
    This Monday i haven't listened to music and with help of God i finished all my college work and also i found time for reading book.
    Tuesday- Thursday- i have listened a bit of edm, trap and completed same goals but i did that very slowly, again i prayed a lot but when you spend time in listening music and doing that for relaxing then it s wasting a golden time. I m so tired because of that, i really don't know how you listen to music but in my case it s a big problem. I m addicted to music. And i know now why and when this happens and from this moment i will try to live without this.
     
  13. Dake1963

    Dake1963 Fapstronaut

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    For both Christian stuff and 'classical' perhaps try something like Handel's Messiah. This is a link to a bit of which seems appropriate for this time of year.
     
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  14. No music seems extreme.

    You could just stop listening music while you commute and when you are in school.
     
  15. I can't stop listening to music it's life for me but I will cut down on listen to music with curses
     
  16. This music was created for the drug and sex scene, so it only stands to reason that such music would not be very helpful when trying to combat this vice. You might be helped by listening to music which draws your attention upward to eternal things.

    Take for example "Sicut Cervus" by Palestrina


    Translation of the piece is: "As a deer longs for the flowing streams, so longs my soul for thee, O God." —Psalm 41:2
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Dec 23, 2017
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  17. Ypow

    Ypow Fapstronaut

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    @TheBeastWithin thanks bro.
    And for those who thinks music is not problem then why i always have problem with concentration(before styding or doing something)? I already said what helped me so my brain adapts to new things.
    I want to stop daydreaming and praying helps a lot. 90% of forum is against religion so maybe you don't want to understand that argument.
     
  18. Praying, fapping, day dreaming, watching movies, listening to music can all be viewed as things that aim to hypnotize. You have discovered that it matters how and what you hypnotize yourself with. And that there is good and bad hypnosis. And as others have pointed out the music you listen to and how you listen to it matters. Looks like the music you listen too puts you in an angry distracted state much like porn puts me in a self-abusive sexual one. You could say, instead of quitting porn, that you are going to stop looking at all images, that would be over doing it, you could say I will only hypnotize myself looking at sexualized objectified people that are not naked... thats not good enough in my view. Best is: I will not seek out negative material but when it crosses my path I will not allow myself to be hypnitized by it.

    The reason I am saying this is because I believe everyone needs beauty. We need it like we need goodness and truth. Beauty is particularly hard these days as it has become subverted by sexual appeal... What triggers sexually borrows from beauty... but it's not beauty... and as garish yet arousing prostitute demonstrate can be quite ugly. In fact I would argue that sexual triggers attempt to hypnotize you into believing something us beautiful that is not and interacting with it in a way that is abusive.

    You can see this mental struggle (both yours and mine) as a form of constant praying.
     
  19. Ypow

    Ypow Fapstronaut

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    Bro read previous comments. Praying is only thing that helps me to avoid daydreaming. I m in that for 7 days now.
    If you are in Christianity nofap group, then you can see how that help other people too.
     
  20. GigglingTrout

    GigglingTrout Fapstronaut

    I haven't given up music, but I did have to quit certain genres that I felt were too dark and contributing to my depression

    Various metal and hardcore bands with negative themes and heavy sound
     
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