Random cross dressing tendencies

It's hard to tell, but this can be some very mild sexual deviation, and the best way to solve it is to ask for professional help. You are at the age that's just perfect for counseling or psychotherapy. Since your problem bothers you I suggest you look for some psychologist or psychiatrist who is not "cross-dressing friendly"! Cause in the last 15-20 years so many things that were considered deviations and had their (IDC) diagnostic classification are not considered anomalous any more. So if you start work with a therapist who is "LGBTQ-cross-dressing friendly" - you might finish even more confused (cause they don't recognize that as a possible problem!).
Not sure but maybe you should choose a female therapist because the therapeutic "transference" process can work the best way in that case (and you'll have insight or a woman in your problem.)

 

… that's why I mentioned some kind of professional help. Your problem is very specific and it is not realistic to expect to find any help on the NoFap or similar forums. There are no experts in the field of psychology and psychiatry here, and besides, even a professional cannot help you without a live conversation! Even if you get some advice here it can be wrong and confuse you even more.
Another big danger is that you get advice from a person who thinks that the problem you have is completely normal and that they try to convince you that everything is fine with you and that you should be a cross-dresser. This can create even more conflict within your personality, cause I don’t see you perceive yourself as a cross-dresser.
Your problem certainly has some basis in the structure of your personality. It is very possible that during your emotional, social, and sexual maturation, something happened that induced it and it is manifesting only now. Considering that you already feel “uncomfortable about it cause I know it's not me as a person” and that the problem can escalate, I think it is best to consult a specialist.
I know therapy or counseling can be expensive, but on the other hand, sometimes a person can’t solve the problem by herself. If it were possible, you wouldn't be here asking questions. I will repeat once again that I think that live conversation is very important in this case. Namely, such problems are not solved through correspondence on forums. I think you will figure it out for yourself very soon.

 

I had that temptation as well, it was just PMO. Might be the same with you.

 

Hmm I think my situation differs from yours in that I've been crossdressing since I was i dunno 10. It was from a weird curiosity as a kid to see what it was like wearing hosiery i think. During teenage years it was def a sexual kink thing, probably like the idea of having a dominent women on top. As I got older it was this weird kink of dressing up fully as a woman and being hit on by a bloke ( I'm straight btw).

I do understand that feeling of that you feel almost like two differnet people when you cross dress, its almost like a feeling of shame. I think when I went to therapy for depression my therapist helped me out a lot in looking at it as being a part of who you are rather than feeling ashamed. Its not easy but it made me accept it more.Then over time i guess i cross dressed less, but i think it returns in waves depending on your emotional mood.

I do agree with Emanuil if that you feel very unhappy about it then consulting a professional maybe the best thing you can do, all we can do is recount our experience or discuss possible things you can do from either experience or things we read up on.