Rebooting Reflection

I myself have experienced the greatness that you can achieve without pmo. I have had a streak of a 90 day reboot and another of 70 days, but have fallen back into a pattern of a week or so without and then a couple days of pmo. I can say that a reboot is never easy and flatline sucks, but you learn so much about yourself which makes it worth it. PMO makes me a boring person no sense of humor not outgoing. When I was in a streak I felt as if i was young again. I had curiosity I had humor and I felt as if i could just interact with others more fluidly. It was amazing i felt as if I was viewing females not as objects for stimulation but as human beings that are meant to be nourished.
To have a successful reboot is it of the utmost importance to have very good discipline and to make goals. It is not only important to make these goals but to stick to them. When i stuck to the goals that I set that is when i took control over my addiction and started the healing process. The goals or rules that I set were 1.Deleting all forms of social media (I know it sounds harsh but no one cares what you are doing 24/7) 2.Meditation once a day (I recommend using headspace the app)3. Going to the gym 5 days a week 4. having a set bedtime morning schedule. 5. reading for 30 minutes at least every night before bed. 6. spending time outside every day (There is a nature park near my school that has an awesome overlook over a lake that i enjoyed hiking to and sitting at) 7. Finally I made it a goal to read the forums and educate myself on the evils of PMO daily. In sticking to these goals I found it that most of the time I was too busy doing something else to be worried about PMO.
There were many benefits and downfalls that happen during a reboot lets go over the positives first. Well to start at the beginning you are going to feel awesome. So the beginning it is the most important time to set all of your goals in stone and get into a good routine. You will also most likely feel as if you are just better at talking to people men and women both. I also found the gym to be very enjoyable and went from 150 pounds with no lean muscle chubby down to 135 pounds with no body fat and I am now back up to 155 of mostly muscle and plan to continue to gain more mass. Not to mention I have an 8 pack now how awesome is that. Along with this I became more confident in myself and did not worry about random things that I would normally worry about. I even found myself a loving and caring girlfriend. Which leads us into the negatives.
I had become too confident in myself and became devastated when I still experienced the effects of PIED (Porn Induced Erectile Dysfunction). I thought for sure that everything was going so good how could this still effect me. And if you have experienced anything similar to this my wisdom for you is to be patient and to be humble. Other negatives, but I don't like to think of them as negatives but as the addicting trying to trick you, that I experienced during my reboot were insomnia at first being tired but not being able to sleep, brain fog such as not being to come up with words when typing papers or just plain having brain farts in the middle of a conversation and forgetting what i was saying, I also would experience strong bursts of emotion mostly anger getting angry at little things that i would not normally get mad at, and finally the feeling of isolation even if I was with friends.
In conclusion if you were to learn anything from my experiences it is to be patient, to be humble, and to not obsess over results because results will come with time. In my research it is the best for a reboot to not PMO and even to not O with an significant other while you are rebooting because the neuropathway associated with O is Still connected to the neuropathway with PMO so when you O you light up the other pathways too. There will be easy day and there will be hard days stay strong through both and never let your guard down.

Feel free to ask any questions I will answer them to the best of my ability.

I will be starting another reboot as of today 9/8/2020 and do not plan on ever returning to PMO. Remember that when leaving PMO behind you are not depriving yourself of anything but you are actually killing the addiction and just bettering yourself as a person.

 

I would say yes, but anxiety runs in my family so from a young age I was taught with how to deal with these feelings and by just accepting them and making a notice of them they will often subside.Meditation also helps tremendously with analyzing your thoughts and letting them pass by without affecting you. Your thoughts are just that your thoughts they are not your beliefs and you do not need to let them control you.
I still too often worry what others think of me. I combat this by reminding myself that I am one of a kind and truly amazing. You cant let what others think of you control you but you can make note of it and reflect on it to maybe better yourself. Luckily I have friends that I could tell anything to and they would understand. I hope that you too have at someone like that in your life.

 

I might as well also use this as a dumping space for my daily thoughts so here we go.
9/9/20.
I have one day left of quarantine. Me and my roommate are both ready to leave the house and get back to seeing other friends and being able to be social again. I get to return to class tomorrow I don't know weather to be happy or not. I am ready to return to face to face class again. I went to the nature trails today and voyaged back to a spot that a bunch of us used to go to freshman year. It is a big rock that overlooks a lake and I sat there and meditated and surprisingly I wasn't bothered by other trail goers even when i could tell at one point they stopped and looked at me. After I went to the library and the gym (Shhh dont tell anyone xD). It felt amazing to work out again I think I'm addicted to the pump but ill take that over pmo any day. I finished all the homework that I had saved for today and just hung out. I did not have any strong urges today and it went pretty smoothly.