Recovery is

[tawwab1]

Recovery is life.
Recovery is patience.
Recovery is kindness.
Recovery is growth.
Recovery is a lesson about people.
Recovery is finally standing up for yourself.
Recovery is being relentlessly practical.
Recovery is pushing yourself out of your comfort zone.
Recovery is filling empty space.
Recovery is hanging in there.
Recovery is persistence.
Recovery is consistency.
Recovery is talking yourself through it.
Recovery is learning to accept frustration.
Recovery is war.
Recovery is choices.
Recovery is a leap of faith.
Recovery is a journey back to honesty.
Recovery is eternal vigilance.
Recovery is something to be grateful for.
Recovery is becoming a villain to some people.
Recovery is knowing your limits.
Recovery is a promise you make to yourself.
Recovery is maintenance.
Recovery is seeing and hearing.
Recovery is unleashing.
Recovery is our new baseline.
Recovery is playing it cool.
Recovery is swinging for the fences.
Recovery is the fight of your life.
Recovery is turning the tide.
Recovery is the best choice.
Recovery is good manners.
Recovery is learning to love again.
Recovery is releasing energy.
Recovery is survival.
Recovery is flying solo.

 

[tawwab1]

The above is a poetic overview pulled from my last journal covering my latest streak.
Now I want to explore it in essay format. What is recovery? In the purest sense of the word?
According to Google, there are three domains where this word is defined: general usage, law, and sports.

1. General Usage:
   1. a return to a normal state of health, mind, or strength.
      • This makes us challenge this idea of the normal state. Is normal proven by actions of the crowd? In our case, no; the majority of people are addicted to porn. Through our recovery, we beat the crowd and experience what some call "superpowers", such as heightened awareness, energy, libido, and attractiveness. But, we are just experiencing normal powers that everyone else is being deprived of.
   2. the action or process of regaining possession or control of something stolen or lost.
      • It brings to light the fact that we are missing something. We can look at it in two ways: either we are at war and the enemy is in possession of it, or it has gone missing and we have to find it again. I find it more helpful to look at recovery as a war against a declared enemy because it shows the urgency and need for strategic thinking. If you know the enemy has what you seek -- your sexual attention -- then you know how to reclaim it back. This is the case for us because once we beat the enemy (porn addiction), we will find what we are looking for.
   3. the process of removing or extracting an energy source or industrial chemical for use, reuse, or waste treatment.
      • This explains the process of reclaiming these powers from the enemy. You look inside yourself and discover inner principles that shape your behavior without your awareness or consent. Inside of you, you have subconscious triggers that activate certain emotions. You also have needs that are unmet, unspoken of, and unrecognized. By raising those to your conscious awareness, through introspection, meditation, or just living a less stressful lifestyle, you can harness sources of motivation and strength you never knew you had.
2. Law:
   1. the action of regaining or securing compensation or money lost or spent by means of a legal process or subsequent profits.
      • When lawyers speak of "recovery," they are referring to a specific process, and this process is known well to experts and practitioners. It's similar to porn recovery. If you do not listen to or get help from experts and practitioners, like people on this site, you will not be able to complete the process, nor will you avoid the pitfalls and common mistakes that foil people's attempts.
   2. an object or amount of money recovered.
      • Lawyers speak of recoveries not just as processes, but as things that are being recovered. This reminds us that recovery is not a means to an end; it is itself the goal. The goal is not to get "recovery benefits." Recovery is the benefit. If you're in recovery fully, with all your mind, body, and lifestyle, you have "recovered." But only for that moment; you can never get complacent on this journey.
3. Sports:
   1. (golf) a stroke bringing the ball from the rough or from a hazard back on to the fairway or the green -- or -- (football) an act of taking possession of a fumbled ball.
      • Even though we are in recovery all the time, the effort we put into it is not going to be equal all the time. We need to focus more when we make a mistake or do something that puts us at risk. At a micro level, this is your "panic button," but at a macro level, it's your intelligence and defensive strategy. Are you aware when you're in a weakened, and what does that look like? What do you do to plan for future weak periods while you're at full streak strength and feeling invincible?
   2. (in rowing, cycling, or swimming) the action of returning the paddle, leg, or arm to its initial position ready to make a new stroke.
      • We know that recovery is a way of "returning" our potential in life, whether sexual or otherwise. Sometimes, after a good streak, we can even feel that potential almost like static electricity. But we should not forget to translate that potential into positive action by "pushing" forward. What would happen if a rower only "returned" his row to the starting position, and never pushed it? He would never move anywhere. If we are bold enough to do our recovery and "return" our energy to its starting place, we must be also bold enough to channel that energy into the next "push" of the oar. Those people who only "return" but not "push" will not be able to return their oar until they do that. For example: you may be experiencing more interest and affection from your wife on a long streak, but what are you doing with that opportunity? Are you making sex more enjoyable for her so she'll be more inclined to keep you occupied with healthy, good attention during your weak points? Are you working out and pushing your body's fitness level to keep the right hormones flowing? Etc.

 

[Deleted Account]

I like the first post better...recovery is different things to different people. I am not sure if we ever recover completely what was once lost, perhaps we return to a similar place but have changed in the meantime nonetheless. When we die do we return to where we were at birth? Or have things since then evolved? We are never quite the same again, are we? For me recovery is about letting go and acceptance....

 

[Deleted Account]

Regarding your ending comments in second post, I would add that even if we don't propel ourselves to the next starting point, life has a way of carrying us anyhow...sometimes it's a matter of holding on for the ride. So there is the active and the passive aspect, yin and yang. Again, for me, I'm not really "doing" anything in particular to recover except letting go of desire and accepting myself as I am with all of the compulsive tendencies etc. So there are many ways to tackle this problem. Just some additional thoughts.