Relapsed after 1 year and 9 months

Thanks a lot for posting this, it was really helpful for me.

 

You can do it. And don't be afraid to seek out a counselor to help you sort through this, if that's something you might be interested in. I talked to a counselor about my porn addiction and it helped to talk to someone in person. Good luck, and don't give up.

 

Brother- you have some level of self discipline and self-respect deep down, otherwise you would not have made it so long on nofap. But this defeatist, "I'm a hopeless loser who will never get laid" self talk will put you right back in the porn gutter if you can't get a hold of your feelings. Change your paradigm now.

I'm a 38 year old virgin. It's not because I'm ugly. I cannot relate to your feelings in that regard. However, I did feel like I would never stack up or be able to make a woman happy for many years. I was afraid of intimacy. Anyways, I felt like I was destined to be in that boat forever. I don't anymore. This because I had some real soul searching talks with myself and thought deeply about what I wanted, my views of me, and what needed to change. And I forced myself to make some uncomfortable changes.

Here's my point- I know guys that are very overweight with bad faces. Many would call them losers, but yet they still have girlfriends. Why? Because they work with what they have. (funny, smart, kind, effective at getting stuff done, won't take crap from anyone, actually care about the girl they are with not just for sex, etc.) Not saying they are dating super models (though a couple of my buddies that are pretty overweight are with real stunners), but they have good relationships. But they never would have found anyone if they wallowed in self pity.

Anyways- Don't be a doormat. Focus on what you do have going for you and play it up. Start working out again and do it properly (learn to train with heavier weights). Hygiene. Dress your best. Try to meet girls with interests common to you.

Don't fap anymore. It does make a difference. If you are fapping, you have ZERO chance of a fulfilling relationship.

BTW- You are not alone in your erroneous beliefs. I have read too many threads like this one here in the forums. Some turn it around, others are still fighting to get started. Best wishes.

 

But the statistics show, an arranged marriage works out on every occasion whereas a love marriage doesn’t. The world is full of lustful love marriages, that’s why it’s in the state that it’s in, havoc and chaos.


Iranian girls r beautiful n hot. I think if you are ready to get married you shouldn’t delay it. If the girl rejects you she’s gonna get a sinful record. Get married while you can. Otherwise the rest of your life you’ll be thinking where it went wrong.

It’s all in your head, it’s all psychological. Get married.

 

Hang in there! You can do it!

 

Hey man
I feel for you
If you did it once you can do it twice
P. Has nothing but what you already know to give you.

I can hear a lot of self hate in your words. Where does it come from? Mother father? Other? Can you love yourself? Would you live a so called ugly girl? We all have something to give and if this is what need the girl than bingo!

Please don't lose hope. There are many married man that commit suicide. It means rhat S or having a girl is not happiness.

We do this together

 

i know exactly how @Xdecidestoquit feels, because i live in the same country and believe me, finding a girlfriend and gettin laid is very tough (or impossible) for some of us, so i feel your pain brother.
sex and loving someone is a basic need and people would feel empty without it but like others said be positive and do not give up, but if u can't get laid at the end of the day it doesn't mean you can't enjoy your life, i know you can't replace sex or loving someone with something else but you can still enjoy your life by experiencing new things, nofap is just a step forward in your journey, if your path is blocked by something try to remove it, you can't remove it that's OK, choose another path BUT do not stop or turn back, keep moving forward and explore your life and more importantly yourself!
Good Luck in your path my friend