Relapsed after 105 days

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by Angriff, Mar 10, 2014.

  1. Angriff

    Angriff Fapstronaut

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    Yep you saw it right, i relapsed after 105 days. I wont lie, i do not feel bad at all about myself. I managed to live 105 days without orgasm and im a young man. I was in hard mode. This does not mean that Im returning to old habits and masturbation just needed to free this frustration. I will remove my counter because it is pointless to keep it further. Like i said, i wont go to old habits definitely and i do not recommend to others to do what i did. Nofap is great thing.
    This happened because i could not sleep, tried to think about something else but nothing i practiced on my journey worked. I started to shake for a little. Im not trying to make excuses, i did what it did and that's it, i do not regret.

    Im going to continue my nofap challenge long as i can.

    Stay strong everyone.
     
  2. Malik Jaffar

    Malik Jaffar Fapstronaut

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    Nah mate. That's not how it works. You are going to return to your old habits. Forgive me for being frank because I really mean no offense but don't ever get cocky from not PMOing for a certain number of days.
     
  3. Angriff

    Angriff Fapstronaut

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    Thanks for your "concern" but I'm pretty confident. From very start i was doing fine and did not had cravings, i would like to see man of my age (29) 105 days on hard mode.
     
    Last edited: Mar 11, 2014
  4. joeshmo209

    joeshmo209 Fapstronaut

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    gotta agree with malik. In my experience, i quit for over 210 days and relapsed and all my old habits can crashing in. Wait a while and you may see that old habits came back with vengeance after relapsing. It may take a few days but it will come if you have your guard down. That's been my experience anyways.
     
  5. Angriff

    Angriff Fapstronaut

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    Look guys, i do not know have you ever seen my previous posts but i was never a real addict to porn. Even this relapse is not connected to cravings for porn but to sexual frustration.
    Counting days and hours, setting goals and counters is wrong approach at first place. You should enjoy your life(not in porn of course)and that is what Im going to do.
    What most of people from this forum does is checking days and hours instead of self self improving. Well i did that but i also counted days and im not gonna do that anymore. Just look you two. you clam that you abstained for 210 days and yet you did not managed to be better you. You may ask why, well for start you have not learned to support other people (not that i need support, from a day one i did not needed it on this forum i was the one who supported others).
    Your approach is wrong because you think that Im you. If you have intention to "support" other people here in this manner, who are way deeper in this better stay quiet and take compassion and support you came for.
    Im sorry for being rude but Im more revolted by reaction of "support community" then upset by fact that i relapsed.
     
    Last edited: Mar 11, 2014
  6. Cojax

    Cojax Fapstronaut

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    Angriff: You are really strong if you can approach your "problem" the way you do, all hail to you;)
    What the other guys mean I think is that sometimes you get overconfident and before you know it you are back to square one. Everyone are not alike of course and if you can manage to live your life without worrying about going back to old habits then good for you man!
    Me myself I realize I will always have this addiction, I will just be on my guard from¨now on because I know someday I might slip back into old habits. My main addiction has always been porn and you say that is not your problem, so that might be what differs you from other people, and not like you say that some people dont focus on self improvements. I think most guys and women on this forum makes lots and lots of personal improvements.. Anyways Best of lcuk to you in the future!
     
  7. Angriff

    Angriff Fapstronaut

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    This is approach people should have here. I almost felt judged by others, gezzz... and yes i am confident in myself, like i said i never asked for support here.
    Excuse me mow i got 3 days of work in my garden than has to be done today.

    Peace!
     
  8. ckrescho

    ckrescho Fapstronaut

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    Oh well thats not that bad.
     
  9. cbrguy

    cbrguy Fapstronaut

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    You did really good...

    Days without masturbation (or sex) - 105
    Days with masturbation - 1

    That is a pretty good score in anyone's book. If you were a football team you would have thoroughly trounced the opposition.

    Whatever works for you.

    As for the negative replies, I think they are just concerned, given the nature of the addiction, that you may relapse. It is not exactly the same, but if I had gone 100 days without smoking after a 40-a-day habit, I would not then smoke casually every once in a while as it would lead me back to addiction. I think that was the point they were trying to make, though the only person who knows what works or doesn't for you regarding PMO is you. Well done for reaching your goal and I wish you well with whatever method you choose.
     
  10. fguy

    fguy Fapstronaut

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    I'm also 29 yrs old and I'm on my 30th day.

    I want to give respect for holding out that long. So what if u relapsed! Count by averages now as you are clearly way ahead of everyone.

    I'm trying to cure my ed. I have a date tomorrow and I know I won't be able to perform. I wish I was 105 days in like you so I can reap the benefits.

    Respect.
     
  11. Angriff

    Angriff Fapstronaut

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    Thanks for heads up, as for negative comments... well i do not want to come here and read shit that i will fail because i encourage everyone to keep fighting. There is just handful of people here who managed to be in hard mode for 105 days as me. Like i said i am still pretty young, i did not had "cravings" i was frustrated and could not sleep anymore.

    For everyone: Keep fighting i promise you it's worth it! Just do not push yourself over the limit you can not handle, damage is same as with every day PMO at least it was for me. I hope that you can learn something from my experience.
     
  12. gettingreal

    gettingreal Fapstronaut

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    attack, you're amazing.
     
  13. Malik Jaffar

    Malik Jaffar Fapstronaut

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    It is not that we are trying to demoralise you. Its that we are trying to explain the very nature of this addiction. The fact that you relapsed proves that you are still addicted, that you still get cravings. All I am trying to say is that you need to be on your guard all the time otherwise you will return to square one no matter how many days you have controlled yourself.
     
  14. William

    William Fapstronaut

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    Addicted or not, 105 is a good run either way. Just beware of the chaser/binge effect.

    Peace.
     
  15. Angriff

    Angriff Fapstronaut

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    "still addicted"? "cravings"? I would really like to see normal man of my age to do what i did specially with sex drive as mine.
    i always could do without porn just fine, i still can and i proved it. If managed to abstain on hard mode for a year and stroked it once in 365 days would i still be addict? Get real and please try not to reflect your own situation on other people, every man is story for him self and my methods obviously did not worked for other people because we are not the same.
    If you think that you are such expert on topic please explain why reboot lasts for 90 days and then if you relapse once you are an "addict"? Can you rewire your brain with one masturbation? I do not think so.
    Frustration and cravings for dopamine are not the same, i needed relieve not fix, did not even felt that "rush" when i did it.
     
  16. Angriff

    Angriff Fapstronaut

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    Do not worry bro, im good now. I don't even got time to masturbate at this point ;)
     
  17. Malik Jaffar

    Malik Jaffar Fapstronaut

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    Either way, all I am trying to say is be careful.
     
  18. slipsonic

    slipsonic Fapstronaut

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    Man, 105 days on hard mode is amazing! Don't worry about the "relapse".
    Having a sex drive is not an addiction, having to whack it twice a day to fake videos of women is. Angriff, you have clearly mastered your self control. Isn't that the point of nofap?
    We are humans, one type of the many mammals on this planet, one of the main driving forces of all living beings is the instinct to procreate.
    All life would be extinct if it weren't that way.
    With that being said, we ARE human and are above the other forms of life by the fact that we can control our urges. Angriff has demonstrated that perfectly. Nofap will never make your sex drive "go away" and it doesn't need to. We are human, and humans are sexually driven beings.
    If you don't have a "mate" to have that release with, it gets exponentially harder to hold it in the longer you go. And IMO it is denying part of your humanity.
    I have a gf right now so my goal of nofap is indefinite, only O'ing with her, but if I found myself single again I would go for 100 days on hard mode, and then allow myself that "release" once a month (no P) until I found another GF, then go back to zero MO. Everyone is different, but angriff... be proud of yourself and just be mindful of your actions so as not to fall into old habits. My 2¢.
     
    Last edited: Mar 12, 2014
  19. joeshmo209

    joeshmo209 Fapstronaut

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    I did not mean to insult you just sharing what my experience was. I wrongly assumed that you were dealing with the problems that most of us are dealing with (pmo). I actually did improve myself during that 210 days that I quit. Keeping track of days is just a small part of the equation of self improvement.

    Because you are coming from a different perspective of not being addicted to porn my advice may not be relevant to you, but that goes the same with you.

    Sorry to break it to you, but you did the same thing to "us two" that upset you as we did to you-giving someone advice when you don't share their perspective or experiences. If you're not addicted to porn how could you possibly know what's best for people that are? Counting days are just a small part of the equation and it does help. Anyways, i hope the best for you in accomplishing your goals.
     
  20. Angriff

    Angriff Fapstronaut

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    Ok, reboot lasts for 90 days right? In that period brain gets rewired. If you wank once in 105 days in hard mode what exactly makes you an addict? Like i sad few days ago i feel pretty confident about myself and i do not need to watch porn i never did, i mostly did it because i was bored and alone. I replaced porn with other useful things to fill that time.
    Returning after 210 days to old habits is not matter of addiction but of character. It is not possible to rewire brain with one masturbation after that long period, im sorry but it's not. That's something that you have to work out with yourself and set your priorities.
    I posted my experiences so many times here and obviously it does not work for many people but it worked for me. I was introduced to internet porn when i was 25 or so, i guess that's my advantage. When i was teen i hardly had chance to watch porn few times a year.
     

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