Relapsed... and I feel like shit!

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by NoFapMoon, Jan 10, 2014.

  1. NoFapMoon

    NoFapMoon Fapstronaut

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    I know 7 days is nothing to some but to me it really meant I was making a major turn around. I relapsed once yesterday morning and three times today.

    Thankful that a place like this proves that even I can overcome this obstacle but the reality of relapsing after making up my mind that the last time would actually be the "last time" hurts. My actions and attitude change tremendously right after Fapping. Now i'm in a daze not completely understanding anything.

    Help,

    NFM
     
  2. Blue

    Blue Fapstronaut

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    Don't be hard on yourself. You're trying; that's the important thing. I relapsed after 75 days. It's a bit discouraging, but only a bit. Relapse, while not the goal, is the norm and to be expected. How many times would you have fapped in that 7 day period if you weren't trying nofap? Try to identify the triggers that led to the relapse and keep going.
     
  3. Kickthatfap

    Kickthatfap Fapstronaut

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    Hey bro, I know that a relapse can be very discouraging. But I congratulate you on making it 7 days. Now get back up and continue moving forward. This thing is a journey and is definitely a challenge so mishaps can and do happen. But everything hangs on how you respond to your relapse. The deceptive thoughts that gets me every time I relapse is that I've messed up one today, I might as well keep at it since it's the same day and I've already messed up. But I have learned that these thoughts are lies that contribute to the snowball effect. When the onslaught of PMO is over I feel subhuman and it's even harder to get back on my feet.
     
  4. Mark

    Mark Distinguished Fapstronaut

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  5. DireWolf

    DireWolf Fapstronaut

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    hey man, coming clean on the forum talking about your relapse is not easy, trust me, i know about relapses, its HUGE, keep going, your progress is not dead, this is just a little bump on the road brother
     
  6. William

    William Fapstronaut

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    Hi NoFap, let's use this as a teachable moment. There is a method to the madness, or perhaps overcoming the madness. I posted a thread here:

    http://www.nofap.org/forum/showthread.php?2402-Get-educated-get-tools-and-learn-to-love-withdrawals

    The first page has some great educational resources. Study your problem. Understand that one part of your brain wants you to quit, another part demands you not. Understanding that your desire to PMO is something that is happening to you--it is not entirely a conscious decision you have made, will help you understand what you are fighting. Once you get educated you will understand that after you failed, you should have been on the lookout for a binge period. A lot of guys report it here, it is called the chaser effect if I recall. So, next time, if you fail again, be warned that the following day you will have the urge to binge; be prepared to expect it.

    I say three things: Get Educated. Get Tools. Learn to Love Withdrawals.

    Understand your problem.

    Tools: Go outside yourself for help. Do not rely on willpower alone. Your brain is fighting itself. We love dopamine, it's the greatest drug in the world, and porn is the button we push to get it, so, get tools that prevent or at least slow down your pushing the button. I use a different filter, but a lot of guys swear by the K9 porn blocker. If you open nofap.org you will see a "Tips" tab on top. You can open it, scroll down, and find a link for the K9 porn blocker.

    Lastly, learn to love withdrawals. Withdrawals are why we fail. They are our dopamine soaked brain punishing us for not pushing the porn button. You did not fail because you were just going through your day feeling fine and had the thought "Hey, I think I'll use some porn today." You failed because your brain punished you into using it. You have to learn to expect that; if you do not anticipate withdrawals, they can sneak up on you.

    That's all I got.

    Good luck on your journey.
     
  7. Angriff

    Angriff Fapstronaut

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    Im sure that almost all of us went trough this. Main thing is that you should not surrender. Try this time last longer. This is not my first try but definitely it is longest and i feel like it im gonna make it this time.
    Earlier last year i lasted for two weeks, then i relapsed and went back to old habits. Then i tried two more times during summer and also failed.
    Last time i did it in evening/night and tomorrow when i woke up. I felt like shit. Faced myself and started thinking what the hell im doing with my life.
    Good thing is to find some thing to occupy your mind. I personally resumed learning German and javascript. Also i started to workout harder. Slowly im trying to establish daily routine which is not strict but i try to fill it much as i can. Learning, workout plus other useful and good things.

    Just keep pushing and never surrender!
     
  8. humilityheals409

    humilityheals409 Fapstronaut

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    I can honestly say I've done the same thing...many of us can! The best advice I was given was take things one day at a time and celebrate each day as a victory. If you last the week, celebrate that. If you get to 30 days, celebrate that! 7 days is nothing to be ashamed of. I have a counting app on my phone, so when I get to the end of the day I can't wait to click another day past and see that number grow. When I'm feeling tempted by porn or whatever I look at the counter and see how long I've been abstaining and it helps me curb the temptation.

    When I first started this, it took me several attempts to get past day 2! Get back on board and go past 7 days now! Fight the good fight, avoid triggers, prove to yourself you can do this! Hands free leads to freedom!
     
  9. RSI

    RSI Fapstronaut

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    Tenacity not perfection is required to form habits. Keep going.
     
  10. monke

    monke Fapstronaut

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    Get up and continue the fight !!!

    Only lost fight is the one that you stopped fighting
     
  11. Siddharta

    Siddharta Fapstronaut

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    I really like this sentence.
     
  12. Misby34

    Misby34 Fapstronaut

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    Hi bro, continue further ;) Stay strong mate.
     
  13. 2014ney

    2014ney Fapstronaut

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    It took me about 3 months to get to 7 days. Congrats on such a milestone.
     

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