Relapsed last night.

Congrats dude. Keep breaking those records!

 

Chin up and all that!

 

Ibrahim i laso slipped last night after 19 days which is my second best time.

Offcourse we are in the fight.

We are fighting until we win !!!

 

Gentlemen, you have to move past "quitting" and you have to get to quit. I was "quitting" for a very long time until I got to "quit". I am quit now. Getting quit for me involved essentially one thing, become porn free. I had to get it completely out of my life, out of my head, out of my brain. In hindsight I see that operates on two levels. First, the practical level, is making a conscious decision to not see it again, not use it, not succumb to it, ever again. It is not a toy you can passively put down but leave in the room with you, because sooner or later it will become the biggest object in the room, you have to throw it away, and walk away from it. You have to give it up, completely. You have to reach a place where you say to yourself--and embrace it--"I am never watching porn again". That was the second thing, telling myself I won't experience it again. I had to move past not watching it, and had to get to wanting to not watch it. That is a very hard thing for any of us addicted to porn to do. We love it. It is the best mechanism in the world to effect the release of dopamine, the best drug most of us have ever taken. It is a hard thing to walk away from, but we have to do it.

I say three things: get educated (understand the problem); get tools (find things outside your self, your will power alone, to help you fight it--such as porn blockers, using this site, etc.); and learn to love withdrawals (there is a reason we fail, and that is our dopamine soaked brains wanting us, begging us, threatening us, reasoning with us, punishing us, to get us to use again). Each and every one of you can do this, it can be done, I promise you. Make a plan. Don't be passive. Make a plan on how you are going to quit it. But it has to be "quit". Porn is not a thing you can put in a box and keep somewhere in your house while telling yourself you won't use again. To quit porn you have to throw it out of your life completely.

Good luck on your journey. And, good job on your streaks. I think if you can get to day 30 with NO porn, it does seem to get easier. That said, I am 5 months porn free and still have difficult days. Getting porn out of your life will make your life easier, but if you think it will make your life easy, you will be disappointed; so don't think it is a cure all. It will be better for you when it is gone, but we all still have to deal with the burdens life throws at us. I am afraid that those of us with addictive personalities will always have difficult days. I don't look at those days as bad anymore; I embrace them as the price of quitting porn. I am done with it, I won't experience it ever again. You know, it is hardly a big thing to give up. It is, in and of itself, valueless. It's just something I cannot control, so, to control it, it had to go.

Peace.

 

What made you relapse?

 

@ mato, there is only one reason we relapse, meaning there is actually no reason, but we succumb to withdrawals. Withdrawals can be brought on by anything, just stress. They are our brain pleading with us, begging us, for that dopamine release. Our brains reason with us, threaten us, punish us, negotiate with us, tell us we deserve it, tell us there is a good enough reason to PMO. It's really just our brain trying to get that fix that we have deprived it from; the dopamine fix. At the end of the day no one makes an intelligent choice to PMO, we PMO because that gets our dopamine levels back to where we are comfortable with. So, we might fill in the "reasons" for a relapse, but we have to understand that for everyone, there is only one reason to relapse; we are feeding our dopamine habit.

When Ibrahim speaks of feeling it coming on for a couple weeks, that is his brain going through withdrawal. Recognizing that helped me to quit. I quit finding reasons outside of myself that gave me permission to PMO, and realized the problem was internal. I then found tools outside of myself to help keep me clean. It's not difficult to understand. We love dopamine. It is worthless, but it is a thrill we, naturally, love. It's built in. Porn releases it. So, ultimately, to quit PMO we have to quit porn, in order to quit that artificially induced dopamine rush. There never is a reason for a relapse, but we come up with reasons to fix. We have to quit fixing.

I wish everyone great luck in quitting.

 

Hey Ibrahim Haidar I think I have the similar issues as you. I can't get it out of my head, I try to think of something else and my mind is aware of my situation, so its always in back of my mind. I hate it, especially when I browse the internet and I know I can look at porn so openly. Right now I have a filter which gives me alot more peace of mind.

And when im just chilling with a peace of mind and im out in public and Iam doing ok, sometimes I see good looking women and you know how that is.
Does anyone know about any internet filter where you can create your own password, where you cant access it. I know about K9 blue coat filter but you need someone else to put a password..

 

That's right, Ibrahim. But quit with knowledge of what you are quitting. Porn itself is the big problem for us. It is a button we push to get that dopamine rush. Soooo, don't just say "I won't PMO again". Or, "I'll MO but not watch porn while doing it". You have to get porn completely out of your life, out of your head. One of the reasons I failed, like many of us do, over and over, when I was in the "quitting" phase, was that I tried to quit, but still kept porn in my life. I watched porn, thought of it, daily, even while I was not PMOing. Even when I cut way back on MOing, I still thought of porn, imagined it, when I MOed. Only when I got P completely out of my life was I able to stop. You will find that when you turn porn off, abandon it, walk away from it, reject it, get it completely out of your life, your thoughts, your head, when you refuse to push the button, that quitting altogether is, if not easy, doable. After a while not watching porn will become your habit, just as watching porn now is your habit. For a long time my daily habit was to watch porn. Now my daily habit is to not watch porn. There are still temptations, but it is almost easy now not to seek it out. Get porn out of your life. It has no value, and therefore giving it up actually will cost you nothing.

Good luck to you.

 

Unfortunately I also relapsed today. But never mind, stuff happens. I'm still in the fight! We can all do this.

 

It's good that you guys are fighting but just keep in mind there has to be a day when you quit all Porn & Masturbation without going back. It's no good to "keep fighting" but relapsing every few days. It's like saying you want to quit smoking but every few weeks you go back for a smoke - it doesn't work. You have to just get rid of it altogether. Stop dipping your feet in the pool and just jump in altogether. Watch every video on NoFap academy on Youtube and memorise all the concepts for how to quit P & M. It's just gotta be done mate if you want to get anywhere in life. Sorry for the strong words but good luck buddy.

 

Ibrahim stay strong and remember that you are defeated only when you stop fighting.

So NEVER GIVE UP !!! NEVER !!

 

Ibrahim, you did what 99 percent of men would never do in their life: not jerking off for 25 days. Congratulations!

 

I disagree Nofap Asian.
Life is not perfect. I think we should consider this NoFap thing as what it is. A lifetime commitment with times where we will need to relapse the tension of our bodies. We don't have to be extreme because if we are, we will pay the price for it. Libido is animal and agressive. We should be flexible and appreciate our ability to delay and appreciate it more than when we were obsessed by it.