Sometimes I forgot to update the counter after a relapse and then I feel I need to relapse again so I can actually update the counter to an actual time. Does anyone feel this way? What should you do if you forget when you relapsed and can't update your counter to the correct time?
Firstly a counter is not what your progress should depend on. Are you at all familiar with a calendar? Maybe you don't know what a paper calendar looks like but if you use a digital one, all you need to do is mark something on the date you get clean. That is your clean date. If you choose to use a counter for tracking or motivation purposes here, at least don't allow not resetting it to be an excuse to fap.
I don't want to say what causes you to do that but from the sound and feel of it, it is pure addict mentality. Be honest with yourself if you actually care about getting better is my advice. Also I track daily progress by circling each day I was clean on an old fashioned paper calendar. One day at a time. I don't obsess on what day I am actually on.
