Relationship Problems While on PMO

Discussion in 'Dating during a Reboot' started by CruzanImpact, Nov 3, 2020.

  1. CruzanImpact

    CruzanImpact Fapstronaut

    Fellas, I need some insight.

    I've been dating my girlfriend for 8 months now and are having problems & we are having problems, mainly from my end. I had picked up porn throughout this relationship due to the temptation of wanting a sexual encounter with my girl. We hadn't had sex for about 6 months (DREADFUL, & don't kill me in the comments) but, due to distance and pandemic, we would sext and FT'X. So temptation arose to watch porn and masturbate after a long streak. Originally I thought it would be easy to quit porn if I masturbated one more time, and I kept saying that every time I finished. After we finally did have sex, I thought, 'this is it, and no more will I need to ever look at P again.' I was wrong and continued to watch porn, fall back into my old habits, breaking my word, procrastination, becoming lazy, etc. All of this came back. I enjoy the sex, and she does too, but there is a lot of insecurity, I feel, millions of thoughts of "What If's" & that I'm just a bum'. Overall my actions have led to more arguments, self-doubt, horrible results in all my work, clouded judgment, insecurity, passivity, poor eating, and the list goes on. My girl is becoming unhappy, and it is a result lt of my choices from my end, and it's driving my insane because I'm doing it.
    I really want to know if watching Porn played a role in becoming low in a relationship or stemming from becoming sexually active again after a long 130day streak (I broke the streak before her, but m'd 5 times).

    Would I see a change for us if I abstained from ejaculation completely, or would just abstaining from P be just as rewarding?

    HELP PLEASE. Preferably from others who have been in the same situation.

    I feel helpless and low. For those who participate in PMO while in a relationship, I want to know do you guys have issues stemming from continually watching porn even in a relationship?
  2. p1n1983

    p1n1983 Fapstronaut

    You are overthinking it. Quit porn and work on yourself.

    Those are turn off for woman. You are acting weak and every woman is going to react badly to a weak guy.
    It's probably you, the good news is that if you change and become again a confident guy, she is going to calm down and start to be happy with his man again.
    NoFap is going to help you with energy and confidence to go after your goals and be your best version. Keep having sex with her, avoiding it is not going to help you at all. Let her come back to you at her pace while she feels you stop been weak and feel that you are again confident and giving masculine vibes.
    CruzanImpact likes this.
  3. CruzanImpact

    CruzanImpact Fapstronaut

    Thank you for the insight, I overthink a lot and you trimming the fat to my words helps and sparks hope. Thank you

  4. AnthonyyVibess

    AnthonyyVibess Fapstronaut

    Porn has nothing to do with you guys fighting unless you’re considering how hard you are being on yourself bro . . . Jus relax most ppl can’t even get to the stage of having sex, you guys are there lol. As far as your bad habits go, we all have them whether we are avid porn-users or not. This isn’t an overnight transformation and your association to negative events strongly stimulates from your loathing of porn and it’s affects in your life prior to nofap but the truth is, NOT EVERYTHING is related to porn and it’s important to remember that on this journey. I just realized my erections aren’t as strong bc i drink a bottle of water maybe once every few months. And that’s a poor habit of mine that has existed well before my fapping issues and it has caught up with me. Stop stressing porn so much bro and ease up on the self pressure you’re applying to you and the relationship
    CruzanImpact likes this.

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