Sadness, loneliness, no motivation (Day 18)

Grant Richard · Sep 11, 2020

Hello everyone,

I've hit day 18 of NoFap, which I'm really proud of, since my last highest streak was 14 days... in April.... and since then I have relapsed every day, until my current streak.

Up until about Day 13 of my streak, I was feeling amazing! It was this uncontrollable adrenaline and desire to just do anything! I was reading, writing, drawing, working out, cleaning, it felt awesome! I got urges, but strong self-talk made me feel a lot better! I felt like a fucking god!

As Day 14 approached, I started feeling a little unmotivated and distracted. Day 15 approaches, I feel unmotivated, distracted, and tired. Day 16, those feelings are worse. Day 17, I'm getting lonely and really unmotivated to do anything. Now Day 18, I'm really lonely, very sad, and don't even have the motivation to do as little as cooking a meal for myself, where as before, I was using zero internet, working out an hour a day, cleaning the whole house, making tons of food, etc. I don't feel tired at all; in fact, I want something to do, but I just don't know why I'm not going for it right now.

Up until Day 13, I just worked a whole lot on stuff I loved, but it didn't tire me. I loved it; I didn't feel tired one bit. And then for some reason around Day 14, I just started falling back into low-value escapism like YouTube and compulsive internet browsing; both of which I haven't done in forever. And day by day since, it's just gotten worse. I was really social, really talkative, super happy, super productive, and I wasn't tired at all. I don't know how I got to this point.

Is this a 'flatline' as they call it? How long will this last? How can I fix it/fight against it the best I can? I don't care if I feel this way for 90 days though, I'm never using porn again to "fix" the problem I'm having here. In the meantime, since porn is not an option, what is an actual option here? I don't even have the motivation to go outside, talk to anyone, go anywhere, do anything, even though I was perfectly capable of it days prior. I don't understand what happened. Any advice would be appreciated.

Srisurya · Sep 11, 2020

Lol you will get used to it.
Just try to make best out of the day despite of the moods etc.
With time these will reduce.

Deleted Account · Sep 11, 2020

It's possible that you have some issues that you were using pm to cover up and you might need to figure those out, but given the fact that you have these things you love and stuff I would say that it's likely just mood swings in a sense. I think you need to make yourself do these things that brought you happiness until your funk goes away. I think the depressive feelings come on to entice us back into our addictions of choice. So hang in there and don't give up on what you love!

alphakadabro · Sep 12, 2020

Grant Richard said: ↑

Hello everyone,

I've hit day 18 of NoFap, which I'm really proud of, since my last highest streak was 14 days... in April.... and since then I have relapsed every day, until my current streak.

Up until about Day 13 of my streak, I was feeling amazing! It was this uncontrollable adrenaline and desire to just do anything! I was reading, writing, drawing, working out, cleaning, it felt awesome! I got urges, but strong self-talk made me feel a lot better! I felt like a fucking god!

As Day 14 approached, I started feeling a little unmotivated and distracted. Day 15 approaches, I feel unmotivated, distracted, and tired. Day 16, those feelings are worse. Day 17, I'm getting lonely and really unmotivated to do anything. Now Day 18, I'm really lonely, very sad, and don't even have the motivation to do as little as cooking a meal for myself, where as before, I was using zero internet, working out an hour a day, cleaning the whole house, making tons of food, etc. I don't feel tired at all; in fact, I want something to do, but I just don't know why I'm not going for it right now.

Up until Day 13, I just worked a whole lot on stuff I loved, but it didn't tire me. I loved it; I didn't feel tired one bit. And then for some reason around Day 14, I just started falling back into low-value escapism like YouTube and compulsive internet browsing; both of which I haven't done in forever. And day by day since, it's just gotten worse. I was really social, really talkative, super happy, super productive, and I wasn't tired at all. I don't know how I got to this point.

Is this a 'flatline' as they call it? How long will this last? How can I fix it/fight against it the best I can? I don't care if I feel this way for 90 days though, I'm never using porn again to "fix" the problem I'm having here. In the meantime, since porn is not an option, what is an actual option here? I don't even have the motivation to go outside, talk to anyone, go anywhere, do anything, even though I was perfectly capable of it days prior. I don't understand what happened. Any advice would be appreciated.
Click to expand...

This is a withdrawal symptom from the addiction. You are still in the early days of recovery. Focus on one day at a time and don't worry about being productive right now. The main goal is to not relapse and begin setting positive habits, like you were doing for the first 14-days. As long as you don't relapse, you can always return to those habits later on when you have the energy. It will take a period of time for you to get out of the slump, it may change day by day, or it may come in waves.

Here is a link to YBOP about PMO withdrawal symptoms. The more you understand about what your brain is going through, the better decisions will make. You will have more confidence in yourself as a result.
https://www.yourbrainonporn.com/reb...oes-withdrawal-from-porn-addiction-look-like/

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Sadness, loneliness, no motivation (Day 18)

Grant Richard Fapstronaut

Srisurya Fapstronaut

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alphakadabro Fapstronaut

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