Saving Myself & My Relationship - Day 0

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by SavingMyself26, Feb 4, 2021.

  1. SavingMyself26

    SavingMyself26 New Fapstronaut

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    So, as the title suggests, I am doing this for myself and for my girlfriend. We have been together for almost 6 years She is amazing and kind and I feel like I owe it to her, and myself, to kick this addiction and give her the love and support she deserves. I am also doing this because I find that porn is something of a crutch I lean back onto when I'm either bored or disinterested at work. It is affecting my productivity and my motivation and it needs to go.

    Porn has given me a disfigured view of the female body, of sex and sexual activities, in addition to giving me nothing but shame and the sensation that I have to hide part of myself from my girlfriend. I'm hiding this hideous, awful part of myself that I cannot contain or control. I often engage in the act when she's not around or when i can get a moment alone in the bathroom - anything to chase that orgasm feeling.

    This has made me less interested in actual sex as I know in the back of my mind that I don't need to engage with my girlfriend in order to satisfy my sexual needs. It's less work, less pressure, and I don't have to worry about pleasing anyone except myself. Except, i miss us fucking like rabbits. I miss the days when i felt like I had nothing to hide, and only looked forward to being with her.

    So, here I am. I want to break this gross and unnatural habit and not have to worry about when I'm going to get my next fix, or if my girlfriend will ever find out and end our relationship.

    I'm doing this for me. I'm doing this for her. I'm doing this for us.

    Day 0 - let's do this.
     
  2. Welcome to nofap @SavingMyself26
    Stay strong and you will achieve your goals
     
  3. Oliver Gunter

    Oliver Gunter Fapstronaut

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    Hello and welcome to this great community! You're doing this for the right reasons. Try cold showers, working out regularly and eating healthy to support your journey. All the best!
     
  4. Robindale

    Robindale Fapstronaut

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    Good for you to work on being the best you, which will only enhance your relationship with her. And getting rid of the isolation, secrecy, dishonesty, etc. will let you really emotionally connect to her. Best wishes - know you can do it.
     
    Oliver Gunter likes this.
  5. runner0424

    runner0424 Fapstronaut

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    2 podcasts and sermons have helped me tremendously if you wanted to give them a shot. One analogy from Rick warren was that I started learned about all the garbage I was putting in my mind. The analogy was how we have to watch what we eat, we can’t eat McDonald’s fried food every meal without bad consequences, the same thing applies with what you consistently put in your mind. We are trying to undo years and years of bad addictions and it takes time to undo that.
    I got more tips if you need some, hope it helps.
     
  6. MexFighter

    MexFighter Fapstronaut

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    Welcome!
    I've been an addict for 17 years now and my greatest advice is confession.. You need to tell to your girlfriend and also a friend or family member..
    Getting married or serious doesn't help to "cure" this addiction.. You can find hundreds of threads here talking about it.. So the longer you hide it the longer you remain trapped.. so its time to speak about it.
    Even If you dont tell to her and you go sober for maybe 6 months?, maybe 1 year, maybe 3 years.. if you keep hiding it and never say the truth you will go back to porn.. Trust me.. so many stories here back up what I say.
    We're addicts and NO ADDICT to any drug has ever gotten sober alone. NO ONE. In fact confession, accountability, sponsorship, AP is the foundation of AA. The 12 steps.. so please confess..
    Use your blockers, do workouts, eat healthy.. etc.
    Good luck.
     

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