seeking support as I try to build more intimacy in my relationship

Hello all,

First time posting here, I have decided it is time I ought to get more active in this community and lean into all of the communal positivity that resides here.

I've had a bad PMO habit for close to 20 years now (I'm 33) - and for the most part it has led to a fear of intimacy and commitment and lots of short relationships and one night stands.

Fast forward to 2020 where I started dating someone in my friend group. She is a wonderful partner and someone I truly want to spend the rest of my life with, when I'm able to view the relationship with clarity.

Around the last year I finally realized that my 2 decade long porn habit has been a huge reason why I have not been able to fully realize all the joys of an intimate, committed relationship.

I have spent most of this year trying to use normal mode to reboot, and while I've had some moderate success here and there, I have relapsed too many times and know deep down I really have to clean it up.

I have a decent understanding of what my triggers are, but old habits die hard.

Thanks for anyone who has read along, really just looking for some support and validation and if this catches on I will continue to post some intermittent updates on my journey.

Cheers